"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Desdinova proves we all can slip at times

SoldMySoul

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Sorry to put you out there Des, but I read some of your recovery journal...not all but some. You have always been solid on here and I have a sense you are really struggling with being dumped. Just goes to show many things: 1) You are human 2) You experience normal emotions 3) you have the ability to try after failure 4) Your hurt and down feelings can be experienced by the best.

With that said, We learn from our mistakes not our successes. All of us need to take a nice, long look deep inside of us as we all can be going exactly through what Des is. When you are down it can take a long while to recover.

Des, I wish you the best and I know you will bounce back, but you sharing your feelings instead of lying to yourself and trying to seem like a hard a$$ is refreshing and it needs be pointed out. WE ALL, AT ANYTIME, CAN slip.....it is how we come back that's makes us stronger and indeed the victor. If you are not careful, a woman can suck the life out of you destroying your desire and ambition to handle yours in life.

THANKS FOR SHARING!!!
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Desdinova

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Just to add on...

I don't feel like I "slipped" by getting highly emotionally involved with the girl. I don't regret it one bit. It actually felt great to feel it again - something I haven't felt since I was an AFC who was madly in love with the woman who drove me here.

Recovering from the termination of the relationship is a bytch though.
 

zekko

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Yeah, I don't think Des slipped at all. The one that slipped was his ex-girlfriend.

:up:
 
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SoldMySoul

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Yeah slipped was a poorly chosen word, but you get the gist. Sometimes no matter how you try or want the person you want....it just doesn't happen. What never changes is who you are and we know who Des is. A warrior on the recovery road and will be back with a vengeance.
 

Boilermaker

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I don't think Des slipped by any stretch of the imagination either.

This is life, $hit happens. You don't call it a "slip" when you get hit by a truck on your way to work or somebody close to you dies, or your trusted girlfriend walks away on you, without warning.

Being a DJ doesn't mean we are to be trained like Navy SEALS. What's wrong with missing a girlfriend?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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B

BeDJ

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A year and half after my 4 year LTR ended, I sometimes look back and imagine what I could have done better. It's bittersweet, but prevents mistakes from happening in future relationships. Having said that, these lessons sometimes intertwine with the good moments you have shared with your ex. Most importantly. forgive yourself and ex for why things didn't work out. We all live, love and learn and learning is the hardest part of all. Look back to gain perspective on life and smile that you had the experience because nothing smacks you harder. Spin plates...
 
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