Defining the relationship

[SandHawk]

I'm currently spinning 2 plates and I am starting to really like one of them. The girl is cute, provide good laughs, is a great masseuse and on top of that, is incredible when it comes to sex. She's pro-active, gives awesome head, loves to be the submissive slave and is up for my experiments and sex in weird places.

In short, a girl that is LTR potential. Now, things are a bit complicated, and I think I like to define the relationship for a bit. I never defined the relationship, but she's giving off IOIs that can be interpreted as being in love. Asking me to come over, keeping me up to date with texts, constantly responds to my Facebook updates.

However, I've never actually defined relationships on my own. Usually the girl would bring it up, and I'd tell em it's purely sexual. This time however, I want to bring it up myself, but I'm not entirely sure. I was thinking about just asking "Alright, I need to get something straight: Is this purely sexual, or more for you?".

Any thoughts on this?

 

[casthenova]

Sounds good bro.

1) "Alright, I need to get something straight: Is this purely sexual, or more for you?".

2) Let her bring it up.

Step up to the plate if its what you want. Take it. Don't be afraid of rejection or loosing her. You obviously have enough game and skill to keep her interested she probably is waiting for YOU to step up. Your the man. Claim what you want. Be SOLID now, don't be another guy on here that didn't know when to stop playing games.

 

[Jeffst1980]

Don't bring it up. That's HER job--and believe me, she WILL bring it up eventually.

In the long run, it's going to be better for you to be the one that GRANTS her exclusivity, rather than the one that ASKS her for it.

When a girl has high interest in you, she's ALREADY exclusive--a truly socially calibrated man understands this and doesn't ask for exclusivity when it isn't necessary. If you want a relationship with her, just wait for her to ask if this is going anywhere, and then tell her you've decided that yes, it is.

This sets the frame and places YOU in charge of the relationship. She will feel MORE invested in you, because she understands that she EARNED your love.

It's a minor detail, but this is the more successful way to handle this.

 

[epic_barrels]

DO NOT BRING THIS UP! Keep doing what you are doing and stay a challenge..I did this recently and messed everything up.

Let her make the move.

 

[SandHawk]

Seems like the advice here unanimous, so I see no reason to ignore it. I'll stick to the plan, let her bring it up and step up my game a bit.

I always threw a little test at her tonight. She was on MSN, so I unblocked her(yes, I usually keep her blocked on MSN because I like to limit the amount of time she gets to speak to me, and she doesn't have to know when I'm home and when I'm not), and she opened me on msn. We had a bit of a chat, and then I popped she was still supposed to come see Donnie Darko(love the film) and proposed a day I knew she couldn't come over. She told me she couldn't come and so I proposed 2 days: Either monday or next saturday. She immediately went for tomorrow and cancelled a meet with her best friend for me. So far so good.

Tomorrow, I'll light a few candles in the living room and put em in the shower as well and then shower with the lights off. I'll see where it goes, and to seriously prevent one-itis, I'm going to sarge for an additional plate as my 2nd plate is starting to annoy me like crazy.