"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Dealing with Karen

Albatross953

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So this question isn't really about dating, but maybe it's related. I work in sales, dealing with the public. Usually I'm top dog. My sales outpace 90% of my peers. Occasionally though I find a Karen.
For example, this week I did a transaction for a middle aged single woman. Post wall, lives in a run down apartment, drives a ten year old car. Has a 24 year old daughter who looks like a hooker. Karen makes a living as a spiritual advisor. (Really?)
She calls my boss today, and tells him I'm disrespectful for calling her Hun. Details everything about our transaction where I went above and beyond. My boss laughed it off. Karen wants another transaction, and wants a new rep.
Now, understanding that you can't win them all, I've seen this before. Washed up woman, latching onto a tiny complaint and blowing it way out of scale. Is she just angry at the world? Can she smell beta? Does she want me to be a jerk back? Does she want to take me to bed?
Honestly, working in sales for two years I've seen this maybe six times. All the same type of woman.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Machine10033

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Don’t give this any more thought... she’s post wall and insane. As I progressed through my career and took on more and responsibility I realized this quote holds true... the lion doesn’t concern himself with the opinion of the sheep. You need to let things roll off you and have a short memory.
 

Spaz

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It's common knowledge amongst many sales people that there's always someone who's gonna hate on you for any number of reasons.

It's also common knowledge that it's best to ignore them and assign another sales personnel to deal with them.

But it will be a problem if plenty of customers are complaining about you...
 

SW15

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At what age do women become Karens? 35? 40?

Karens are more prevalent at certain household income levels too.

I would define a Karen as a 35-54 year old white woman who is....

a) married and resides in a household with a income of $100,000 a year or more. Husband, like a beta, likely makes more of the money. Likely has children. Has a BA/BS degree or higher.
b) Co-habits with longer term boyfriend. Childless. Income $100,000/annual +. Both partners work. BA/BS degree or higher.
c) a divorcee or never married with an income of $80,000+ and/or higher net worth household. Childless. Women with wealthier families can become Karens if their parents are higher net worth and they don't make their own money. even BA/BS degree or higher.

In the case of the first post here, that is likely a ~50 year old. Unless she was getting immense alimony payments or had higher net worth parents, a spiritual advisor typically doesn't make enough money to start to act like an entitled brat. Living in a run down apartment and driving a 10 year old car isn't typical Karen behavior.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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So this question isn't really about dating, but maybe it's related. I work in sales, dealing with the public. Usually I'm top dog. My sales outpace 90% of my peers. Occasionally though I find a Karen.
For example, this week I did a transaction for a middle aged single woman. Post wall, lives in a run down apartment, drives a ten year old car. Has a 24 year old daughter who looks like a hooker. Karen makes a living as a spiritual advisor. (Really?)
She calls my boss today, and tells him I'm disrespectful for calling her Hun. Details everything about our transaction where I went above and beyond. My boss laughed it off. Karen wants another transaction, and wants a new rep.
Now, understanding that you can't win them all, I've seen this before. Washed up woman, latching onto a tiny complaint and blowing it way out of scale. Is she just angry at the world? Can she smell beta? Does she want me to be a jerk back? Does she want to take me to bed?
Honestly, working in sales for two years I've seen this maybe six times. All the same type of woman.
1. Avoid. 2. Hand off to your boss or supervisor 3. Go sell

If you must, be close ended Q. Lead sale. Exercise plausible deniability ie waa closing other sales so, i froze her out. Obv don't tell your boss.

Its a time suck. Disregard. put on ice. Always. Subtle and never direct. Always indirect.


Chalk it up to a life lesson. The corporate world is full of Karen's. You know that type. Body positivity, don't need no man, fish bicycle, girl power and bulking season between man hating or bashing their hubby.

They will bait you. Pay no mind. Aim for entrepreneurship. Aim for side hustle. Aim to sell your product. Your biz. Blend in. Don't seek war but know that war is always on the horizon.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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EyeBRollin

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Don’t use terms on endearment like “hun” on any woman you aren’t fvcking. Even if your intentions are good it can be perceived as harassment. This is me too era. Just call her by her name or “ma’am.”
 
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Don't assume that she wants to be addressed as "ma'am." She may be feeling like "sir" that day. Use the creature's name.
 

Mike32ct

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Don’t use terms on endearment like “hun” on any woman you aren’t fvcking. Even if your intentions are good it can be perceived as harassment. This is me too era.
Yeah sadly that's true.

Don't assume that she wants to be addressed as "ma'am." She may be feeling like "sir" that day. Use the creature's name.
Agreed. I think "Ma'am" may be an outdated term at best (outside of the military or maybe parts of the south?) and not appreciated at worst because it makes her feel really old.

Probably best to use Ms. So and So initially until she says just call me "XYZ."
 
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Lookatu

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At what age do women become Karens? 35? 40?
In my opinion, Karen's can exist at any age. It generally happens when they don't have any more redeeming features. Some start out as Karen's.

Women that are either post-wall, obese, or anything that repulses men to them are the one's that become jaded and bitter and any opportunity where they feel they have some ammo, they will use.

For example, I see fat/ugly women in the workplace flex their muscle using their title at work to put down people because they know that's the only place they feel empowered. The know damn well on the streets that they are nothing but fat cows to everyone.

Same thing you see where these b1tches try to flex their muscle on service workers because they are paying for a service with their money and it's the money they have power with and often complain the loudest, not because anything is necessarily wrong, it's just because they can and it gives them a sense of empowerment.

Just my $.02
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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EyeBRollin

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Agreed. I think "Ma'am" may be an outdated term at best (outside of the military or maybe parts of the south?) and not appreciated at worst because it makes her feel really old.

Probably best to use Ms. So and So initially until she says just call me "XYZ."
No. She’s just a bvtch if ma’am is offensive to her. That’s one dispute HR will take your side on.
 

dark god

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Lol "karens"...met a ton when I worked at a hospital
 
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