THE_ADDMAN
Master Don Juan
A situation happened to me recently, and its caused me to notice a flaw that is holding me back. perhaps some of the more experienced DJs can help me
I was hanging with some friends at lunch the other day, and we were all talking. all of us were telling jokes, so to tease one of the girls, I told her a woman joke as we were walking to class. (they had all been telling jokes that teased one another)
we exchanged a smirk, and we all kept walking. she gave me a poke in the side, so I poked her back. she did it harder, so I reached back and messed up her hair, and it escalated with (what I thought) was harmlessly play-fighting. so I'm walking, play-fighting, when out of the blue I hear "OK! you know what?! **** OFF!" from her. and it was not playful. it was dead-serious and angry.
I was totally stunned. here I thought it was harmless play fighting, and I had not accidently touched anywhere inappropriate or did anything besides playing around. so I did nothing that I thought would elicit that kind of response.
I talked to some of our friends later, asked what had happened, and the 2 friends (they are girls) mentioned that "oh, apparently she thought u were play-fighting too hard". then they made a comment how guys cant understand what a girl REALLY means by what she says (right, I dont usually interpret "**** OFF!" to mean "not so hard, please " )
First of all, how do you guys read into the situation? what should I have done/not done, do you think her behavior was appropriate, etc
also, in regard to my getting stunned whenever a woman yells at me angrily. I guess I still have some bad programming that holds me back and prevents me from handling these female outbursts properly (call it society and twisted "chivalry") It causes me to freeze up and not know what to say. by the time I regain composure, its too late. any advice for dealing with this issue is also appreciated.
Thanks in advance.
ADDMAN
I was hanging with some friends at lunch the other day, and we were all talking. all of us were telling jokes, so to tease one of the girls, I told her a woman joke as we were walking to class. (they had all been telling jokes that teased one another)
we exchanged a smirk, and we all kept walking. she gave me a poke in the side, so I poked her back. she did it harder, so I reached back and messed up her hair, and it escalated with (what I thought) was harmlessly play-fighting. so I'm walking, play-fighting, when out of the blue I hear "OK! you know what?! **** OFF!" from her. and it was not playful. it was dead-serious and angry.
I was totally stunned. here I thought it was harmless play fighting, and I had not accidently touched anywhere inappropriate or did anything besides playing around. so I did nothing that I thought would elicit that kind of response.
I talked to some of our friends later, asked what had happened, and the 2 friends (they are girls) mentioned that "oh, apparently she thought u were play-fighting too hard". then they made a comment how guys cant understand what a girl REALLY means by what she says (right, I dont usually interpret "**** OFF!" to mean "not so hard, please " )
First of all, how do you guys read into the situation? what should I have done/not done, do you think her behavior was appropriate, etc
also, in regard to my getting stunned whenever a woman yells at me angrily. I guess I still have some bad programming that holds me back and prevents me from handling these female outbursts properly (call it society and twisted "chivalry") It causes me to freeze up and not know what to say. by the time I regain composure, its too late. any advice for dealing with this issue is also appreciated.
Thanks in advance.
ADDMAN