"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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dating and kids

1utfan1

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Hey DJ's,
Been with my girl for a year. She has a little girl (3 years old). Her dad is a goofball, she's a little bratty (especially around the grandparents) but I like being with both of them. I guess I just need some advice on dealing with a women with a child. Any pointers?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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dietzcoi

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I personally would not do it, so I cannot give you any pointers. Just be sure what you are doing. The woman wants a replacement father for the kid. It will dominate all your interactions. Hope you know what you are doing.

DIetzcoi
 

WaterTiger

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I'd also be VERY careful about making friends with the little girl. There has been cases where the stepfather/boyfriend has become a psudo-father to the child. Hense, in the eyes of the law YOU are the only father she's ever know and she is bonded to YOU. This means they can make you come back for visitations even if you and Mom break up...for the best interest of the child.



P.S. All three year olds are bratty...it's just the nature of the beast. :rolleyes:
 

1utfan1

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Originally posted by WaterTiger
I'd also be VERY careful about making friends with the little girl. There has been cases where the stepfather/boyfriend has become a psudo-father to the child. Hense, in the eyes of the law YOU are the only father she's ever know and she is bonded to YOU. This means they can make you come back for visitations even if you and Mom break up...for the best interest of the child.



P.S. All three year olds are bratty...it's just the nature of the beast. :rolleyes:
Sorry, my original post was a little unclear. The girls father is active (not as much as he should be) in her life. He see's her twice a week. I just was looking for some pointers on how to deal with the various BS one goes through when dating someone with kids. Thanks for your replies.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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disciple

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Like my father once told me: Don't date a woman with kids unless the baby daddy is no longer in the picture. There are too many complications that can arise when the child's father is an active part of the picture. A lot of these guys still feel like that's their territory even though they're not with the woman anymore. I've dated woman with kids so I speak from experience. Try to avoid the ready-made-families. The reality though is that there are more single moms than ever before and with many women choosing to raise kids as a single parent and the high divorce rate creating newly single mothers everyday, sometimes it may be hard to find one who doesn't have a kid (especially if they're in the 30-40 age range). That being said, I would try to stick to dealing with one child and not a pack of them but only if the baby daddy is not an active part of the picture.
 

dietzcoi

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Not to mention, that there must be some issues, or why would she be a single mother? Yes the father may be 100% the problem but I doubt it very much. Therefore this single mother has some problems or faults of her own. Of course all women have something wrong, but still... watch it. I personally want no part of it, ever again. I did do it once, and the drama was too intense.

Think about it... you are just asking for more chains to be added to your legs... you should be freeing yourself from chains, not adding chains (drama)

Dietzcoi
 
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