You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Yes she probably is...and yes i will too.....She is spinning plates....
Go NC and spin your own....
i have plenty of self respect....i never chased her...nor will I ever chase any woman. i walked away and have not looked back....i was asking about bday text because i want to show indifference....but after thinking about it...she deserves absolutely nothing from me...i don't care she reached out 3 weeks ago, she never showed and then goes distant for 3 weeks? peace, have fun rolling into your 30's drinking and getting drunk while the rest of your friends are moving on with their lives and forming families.You don't date flakes. Stop wasting your time. If she flakes, she's out. She's dead.
IF you've already had sex with her before her flake, you can keep her around by demoting her to a booty call. You will not pursue this woman ever again.
Have some self-respect. Women that like you do NOT flake.
Glad you already know what the deal is.i have plenty of self respect....i never chased her...nor will I ever chase any woman. i walked away and have not looked back....i was asking about bday text because i want to show indifference....but after thinking about it...she deserves absolutely nothing from me...
I can blow a load into anyone and "form a family." Is that supposed to be some sort of accomplishment?peace, have fun rolling into your 30's drinking and getting drunk while the rest of your friends are moving on with their lives and forming families.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
The point is she doesn't care. Meet a woman that does.i dont know dude, take it for what you want. Point is she's too flaky to know a good thing when it comes around
you are exactly right....The point is she doesn't care. Meet a woman that does.
Agreed...i gave her benefit of the doubt... Now that i think of it, i wonder if she was seeing another guy in the meantime... Who knows. She sidnt come across as that type of woman, but its very possible... At this point who cares.You should have tried to bang her on the second meet up. I would have laughed if a broad said hey lets me up again in 12 days. Forget about her and find new prospects.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Only if you want to be her chump.Im supposed to ask her out after she cancelled and never rescheduled??
2 This is a typical case of a woman who showed some interest but then because of X, Y or Z she lost interest.
You cannot do anything about it. You showed her you were interested; she showed you she aint not longer interested. End of the story.
You did fine, it happens.
The ONLY reason why i thiught of sending bday text was to show indifference by not letting her think im affected by dissapear act.I think you're 100% correct: knowing why doesn't matter. If you knew why, it likely wouldn't change a thing.
I challenge you to delete her number AND if she texts you, wait a few hours then respond with, "Who is this??"
Oneitis can creep in very subtly (i.e. your wanting to wish her Happy Birthday).
In my opinion deleting her number and focusing on other women will make it a little easier to ignore her and eventually erase her from your mind.
For validation and an ego boost to know that she still has you if she wanted you.Exactly.... And i walked each time she flakes. I know it doesnt matter, but why reach out a few weeks ago? Makes no sense to me if she had zero interest.
today is her bday, she gets sht from me. I walked and Not looking back.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
You should stay honest with yourself in any way. Even it creates temp painful feelings. It makes you to who you want to be. And that's the most important.Because she likes toying with you and manipulating you. Its fun for her and makes her feel important and not worthless.
My ex girlfriend tried to keep a strong line since she dropped me 2 months ago. But she didnt want to lose me (WTF!). She pushed and pulled back like 'I doubt again on my decision because you still touch me with what you say'. Blablabla. (why the hell broke you up?)
I kept my position. Me 100% or nothing.
I wrote her a very open letter 1,5 week ago. I'm very vulnerable in it and expressed my love for her straight away.
That's the second time you said that. Seems to me she didn't want to put any effort into the relationship,and wanted you to do ALL the work....to make her and yourself happy.She said she would respond as soon she has read the letter. For sure she received the letter already.
Silence till now. The longest we have since break-up. She wanted to keep 'the good part of me' without doing any effort for the other parts. Sorry girl, it's the whole package, like I take you too with your + and -.
I doubt it. From the way you described her,I think the only thing she's conflicted about is how to make it so you continue expressing your love/desire for her,so her ego will continue to get fed.I'm sure she is conflicting heavily with herself now (on social media, used to be active, complete silence also) and don't know yet how to react.
In that case,your letter was a failure. Seems like you want maturity,and respect out of her.Indirectly the aim of my letter: face you insecure attitude, grow up or leave me alone.
I do. The standstill she has you at now,it's where she's gonna keep you. You sent her the letter a week and a half ago? No response as of yet? There'll CONTINUE TO BE none. And if she does reply,I can predict what she'll say.....I have no idea what the outcome will be
Whatever it takes to make yourself feel better.But anyway the stress is building up on her now. Eat it.
Really.....I'm still feeling very well having sent that letter/message.
What's wrong 'being weak'? I love this forum, but if it's only for the sake of being 'we overpower the girls and period' I'm not following.In that case,your letter was a failure.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.