Dated 2 Weeks, Never Turned Down, Now Busy 1st time

[VAboi]

I asked this girl out online, she said yes and it went well. We had sex on the first date, then again 2 days later. We had probably like 5 more dates and had sex every time but the last time which was a few days ago. On the 3rd date I bought her dinner then we had sex, the next date we had sex and I spent the night at her place and she bought me breakfast at a restaurant. Then we went out again, and had breakfast at like 3 A.M.

She almost never initates contact with me, but responds.

This is a text exchange, around 5 days.

Her: The apartment is not on fire. but if it was, Joy would have put it out with her superb water spilling skills . Drive save, nighty <3

Me: haha.. Joy... gnight

Me. Hows work baby? *sends snap chat of me at a bar drinking

Her: whaad up *cash emojis

SATURDAY:

Me: call me when you get off work, taking you out tonight

Her: Okie dokie

SHE CALLS ME, we go out. She is tired from work and when we get back she only wants to cuddle and not ****. I cuddle with her then since she doesn't want sex because shes about to pass out. I jack off in the bed next to her, and ***. LOL

She asks if I can go because, she's tired. So I leave.

Sunday:

Me: I got some saltenas! they Taste REAAAAL GOOD. I want to bring you some

*no response.

Wednesday

Me: I hit my 3k quarterly bonus! Crushing it at work. I also got another letter of rec for my MBA program! Let's go out tomorrow, I'm taking you out. I'm SO ****ing happy!

Her: Awesome. I'm proud of you, but I'm busy tomorrow

Me: k no worries, when are you free this week?

Her: Maybe sunday, but I was planning on doing some shopping for house things *she recently moved here and has a new apartment with barely any furniture.

Me: Yah, you def need to buy some things haha. Coke Zero *cough cough. (inside joke) K, we can celebrate next week on Tuesday. Have fun shawwwpin.

*no response.

Should I ask her out on Tuesday and no contact for now? She didn't respond to the Tuesday suggestion. This is the first time she said shes busy without suggesting another day.

 

[marmel75]

You are coming off sounding kinda desperate for her attention and Kinda clownish which is funny at first but gets annoying fast...she needs to wonder about you and what you are doing...right now she knows she can have you anytime she wants and you will go out of your way to see her.

Basically she has the frame and the power and is gaining more by the minute.

Unless this changes and changes quickly, you are on your way out...you might get another Fvck or two out of her but there is someone else lurking behind the scenes she is ready to jump to...

 

[VAboi]

It was the first time this happened, and I already ****ed her a lot. And shes bought be breakfast before. I don't think it's going that bad. Just interested on how to play it.

 

[dude99]

I asked this girl out online, she said yes and it went well. We had sex on the first date, then again 2 days later. We had probably like 5 more dates and had sex every time but the last time which was a few days ago. On the 3rd date I bought her dinner then we had sex, the next date we had sex and I spent the night at her place and she bought me breakfast at a restaurant. Then we went out again, and had breakfast at like 3 A.M.

She almost never initates contact with me, but responds.

This is a text exchange, around 5 days.

Her: The apartment is not on fire. but if it was, Joy would have put it out with her superb water spilling skills . Drive save, nighty <3

Me: haha.. Joy... gnight

Me. Hows work baby? *sends snap chat of me at a bar drinking

Her: whaad up *cash emojis

SATURDAY:

Me: call me when you get off work, taking you out tonight

Her: Okie dokie

SHE CALLS ME, we go out. She is tired from work and when we get back she only wants to cuddle and not ****. I cuddle with her then since she doesn't want sex because shes about to pass out. I jack off in the bed next to her, and ***. LOL

She asks if I can go because, she's tired. So I leave.

Sunday:

Me: I got some saltenas! they Taste REAAAAL GOOD. I want to bring you some

*no response.

Wednesday

Me: I hit my 3k quarterly bonus! Crushing it at work. I also got another letter of rec for my MBA program! Let's go out tomorrow, I'm taking you out. I'm SO ****ing happy!

Her: Awesome. I'm proud of you, but I'm busy tomorrow

Me: k no worries, when are you free this week?

Her: Maybe sunday, but I was planning on doing some shopping for house things *she recently moved here and has a new apartment with barely any furniture.

Me: Yah, you def need to buy some things haha. Coke Zero *cough cough. (inside joke) K, we can celebrate next week on Tuesday. Have fun shawwwpin.

*no response.

Should I ask her out on Tuesday and no contact for now? She didn't respond to the Tuesday suggestion. This is the first time she said shes busy without suggesting another day.

Two giant luls of no response from her. Dude she is seeing more than one guy (more than you) and right now he has her attention. That is a huge sighn of low interest when she ignored you for days

I wouldn't ask her out. I would go ghost.

 

[Reykhel]

That's a lot that happened in the space of two weeks.........a lot.

Your wording is even quite interesting "we dated for two weeks".

You said you met the first night, then two days later......then like 5 times after that........again that seems
like an incredible amount of time to spend with someone is such a short space of time...

You seem to be in her face a lot, pursuing her. She doesn't have a chance to miss you nor a chance to pursue you....

It would appear that you don't have any other options to pursue and your launching into this one with all guns blazing.....

But even if we're not taking about options/spinning plates.......I wonder do you have any other activities or social pursuits in your
life. You must be giving her the impression that you have nothing else going on in your life because that's the impression I'm getting
from reading what you wrote.

So you've over pursued and spent too much time with her........let's leave that aside for a second..

You've made her an offer.......and there was no counter offer.........simply that she's busy..........(at least there was no bull****e excuse or lie)

It's up to her to counter offer now..............you could always go ghost for a week or so.......and if she doesn't contact you, you
have the option of dropping it completely or hitting it up one more time with an offer of hooking up (I'd never lower myself to ask more
than twice if there was no counter offer..)

But either way, you should back off and be genuinely busy pursuing other pursuits......it's funny when you're genuinely busy
you're phone starts hopping with messages...........

 

[The Duke]

Her interest level has dropped most likely because she is interested in somebody else. Also, you needed to slow your roll a little. You come across like you have nothing better going on and she is your major focus. You have to keep them wondering what you are up to. Its good to be a little scarce.

Maybe she saw you as just wanting sechs???

 

[Arcturus]

You don't know what's going on in her life. Girls can get really emo and shut down sometimes. Don't message her first, and wait for her to get in touch with you, if 2 weeks pass, shes moved on. If she contacts you, cut the bs and try to meet up with her in person as soon as you can. When in person, straight up ask her what the deal is. If she has a good reason, like depression due to grandma dying, then be cool, if she has no reason, you need to next her and go no contact.

 

[marmel75]

It was the first time this happened, and I already ****ed her a lot. And shes bought be breakfast before. I don't think it's going that bad. Just interested on how to play it.

Yes...read my post again...being clownish gets kind of annoying after a while...

You are at the stage where she is thinking of whether or not she wants something long term. If she doesn't see anything long term she is likely planning on dumping you before she gets too invested. It happens, not much you can do. Could be another guy, could be she doesn't see anything long term, could be any reason really...

You are not going to get anywhere by continuing to push...pull back and see what happens

 

[resilient]

If she has (or had) higher interest level, she would counter-offer another date and time. Don't get too attached too early. It's time to back off and let her pursue you.

Don't try to display higher value or seek validation in your texting/calls. Actions speak louder than words. Your bonus and letter of recommendation should be for you. You earned it. Enjoy your success. Maybe upgrade a wardrobe piece. Get a massage, etc. But I wouldn't seek her for validation. Ever.

In my mind... I think the text convo would have sound better like this:

Wednesday

vaboi: Work has been mad crazy. I have some interesting news on the MBA progress. We can savor that over drinks tomorrow. How about Jimmy J's at 7pm?

Her: Awesome. I'm proud of you, but I'm busy tomorrow.

vaboi: Alright. My weekend is already booked, unfortunately. Let's get together Monday for dinner. I'll let you cook me something nice, I'll bring the wine.

 

[dustmuffin]

ghost her for a couple of weeks. If she doesn't contact you you can ask her for a date at that point. If she says no......move on....Don't fixate on her. Sounds like she might have what she thinks is a better deal. Plus you did make yourself available quite a bit. Cut that crap out.

 

[pyros]

Probably she's more interested in another guy or... you're annoying her too much, or both.

Anyway, it seems she likes to have sex with you BUT...you are acting too damn over-eager! you're pursuing her TOO MUCH. And if you pay attention, the more you pursue her, the less she wants to see you.
Conclusion...? stop pursuing her so much, stop initiating so much. At this point, SHE should be initiating not you. Once you have sex a couple of times with a girl, if she has interest in you, SHE WILL CONTACT YOU, but if she doesnt and you do too much, it decreases her attraction for you.

So, stop contacting her. Give her space, and if she contacts you DONT LOOK SO OVER-EAGER, and do not ask her out rightaway. Why...? because you've already showed too much interest and she hasn't reciprocated it, so you should be pissed, and since she pissed you off, now she has to earn your attention, not the other way around. She should be worried that you may not want to see her again.

That's pretty much it.

 

[VAboi]

yeah I'll just go no contact. I assume she will text me back within a week. then I'll never do this behavior again. I've learned from my mistakes.

 

[Glassguy]

Good advise here.

You came across WAY too eager. She could tell you had no other options. The easy fix to this is get other options! Do not initiate any contact with her for at least a week or two. At that point just send a simple "Hey " and see how she responds.

If she texts you, act half intetested. Let her think your banging someone else and let her hamster spin.

 

[Bayne05]

You lost your frame bud. Banging her more then once doesn't mean you can now be available for her all the time, you coming off as an overly attached guy with no options and she's considering dropping you if she hasn't already have. You've done enough texting, go ghost now.