"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Damn guys, sometimes things hit you a bit more

Ricky

Master Don Juan
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I am in the process of moving to a new town.

I don't know a damn person there, which isn't the problem as much as it has really started me thinking about whats important in life.

My parents are getting older, I'm missing them

I've dated a ton of girls and am currently in a long distance relationship with a girl I really love. But I have this feeling that she won't move to be with me even though she had talked about it.

I am sitting alone in a hotel on a Friday and getting ready to go out to eat.

But damn man, I haven't felt this low in a while. I should be feeling great and excited. I have a great new job lined up that will really be great for my career.

But I can't help but think, I'm 31, I should be settled down and in place in life instead of starting over again in a new job and a new town.

Yes financially I'm in a job that pays well (although in a town that is really expensive)

Anyways it's just a funk, but I tell you what I feel pretty sad.
ANd it's of my own doing. I could have just stayed in town.

Change can be really hard sometimes...
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Chrispy

Senior Don Juan
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Good luck - i think you're making a good move, because you need a good job with good money before all the gf and stuff work too. I gotta be blunt, but I'm not sure how long the gf thing will last - long distance is very straining and you're being unfair to yourself -

Think of your new town as a new adventure, and that when u see a girl/stranger you can do the cold approach and ask for directions, and do the whole "i'm new here" intro :)
 

jbbrain

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If you're 31, then there's a good chance you've dealt with substantial change in your life already. If you haven't, then there's no better place and time then here and now to embrace it.

You have to keep in mind to accept and celebrate change for what it signifies...a new beginning, a fresh start, new people, new experiences..leaving the old behind...

You fear change because you got too comfortable with what you had before. After you settle in and realize that this change was EXACTLY what you needed, you'll learn for the next time never to allow yourself to get to comfortable and complacent with your surroundings.

I think you just need to relax and savour the moment and opportunity man. Change (for the most part..or at least in this case) is a chance to experience life that much more as well as a chance to help you grow as a person and maybe even find happiness you never knew existed in your 'previous' life. Youre 31 which isnt too old 'at all'. Bro, you're still a young guy with 'much to see'. I'd be giving you the same advice if you were 51. There are no rules that everybody must conform to, dude...definoitely not by 'society's' standards.

Relish it, even if it doesn't go smoothly at the beginning. Just keep a good head about it and make your judgements later, if you so choose.
 

Slickster

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If you were settled down in your home town with a gf or wife (maybe some kids) then you'd probably be wishing you had experienced more in your youth. Done more things, travelled more, etc.

Change can be rough Rick but it only makes you better.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Ricky

Master Don Juan
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Yeah guys the problem is yeah that I'm moved before and that was all good.

But now I'm 31 I'm feeling like I should have already been setting down roots.

And it hasn't been happening.

And it doesnt' help that i really love a girl but I'm not sure if we will be together. It isn't oneitis, this time its a bit more. After dating alot of girls, she is really great. But lately it doesn't look like it's gonna happen for us.

Believe it or not, I'm tired of going to pick up girls all the time and being on top form for that type of ****. I guess the reason is, things go great initially with all of them then it all falls to hell. I guess I am worried about where it will end up more than living each day.

****
 
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