"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Curb anti-social tendencies or force myself out?

Tomo

Senior Don Juan
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Lately I've been really upping my self-improvement regime and with the coming of winter have felt more comfortable being less social. Every weekend I find myself invited to parties but I am finding myself more and more incline to relax at home; especially having finished a month internship at a hospital (for this weekend particularly).

Because of this, it leaves me in a dilemma. On one hand I am comfortable but on the other, I am not expanding my social circle, going out, etc yet I'm not feeling the fun of it. It does not help when friends are themselves in relationships so they can reasonably (to the eye of everyone else) have a quiet night in.

So what do you guys think? Should you always be pushing yourself out socially? Is how I am feeling right now just me reverting to comfortability? Or is it reasonable to be anti-social?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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blind_one

Master Don Juan
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I'd say take a couple days easier if you feel you need to. Expanding your social circle is important and all but you shouldn't force yourself.

HOWEVER, the best parties I encountered where the ones where I was hesitant about going BUT THEY TURNED OUT GREAT sometimes from various reasons like :

- Slept 2 hours after a 30 hour trip to and from a music festival,
- After a 12 hours shift at work,
- "boo hoo im such a puzz its raining like sh!t and I'm being b!tchy for some reason" :p

Sometimes you just gotta plunge youself into the world and own it.:rockon:
 

Special EDy

Don Juan
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I, and several other people I know, tend to go through a back and forth thing between introversion and extroversion. Maybe somewhat like how a BP goes from high to low, I will find myself extremely outgoing, talking to everyone and pushing myself out into the world. Invariably I overextend myself and when I get a chance to cut back, like the semester ending at school, I pull back into my shell and go introvert.
Its a change from needing social energy to charge you up to having social situations drain you, and needing alone time to recharge. I usually give myself a month or two to switch. Just pick up some self improving things in the meantime; working out, learning something new or any self betterment. You will bounce back soon enough.
 
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