Contending life: The Struggles of One Man overcoming Extreme Hardship.

[Contender]

Update

In short: I Fuc'ked up my chances with that girl.

Whinning won't do anything.

But, I learned a lot from it. I'm over it, and I'm moving on already.

I need to prioritize; women are not up there. I was too available you know. I turned her off by acting differently from my confident-self when I chilled with her.

But, that's O.K. I'm glad I LEARNED it now. It's one thing to be told not to do certain things around girls, but it's another to LEARN why not to do it.

I don't like to follow people's advice blindly. I seek out my own truths.

I made so many mistakes, but I'm glad I did them. A) It shows how fuc'ked up she really is. B) It's better to learn now, than wait.

I simply have to DO the things I love to do, without letting WOMEN control what I do.

If I set out going to the gym at 3:30 PM, then, sorry babe, but I'm going to the gym. I'll see you after. No? Okay, have fun babe, talk to you later.

:box:

Fitch inspired me to pick up surfing... so, I'm going to try it out. I snowboard, but never tried surfing - it should be fun; I love the beach.

I broke another personal record at the gym. My gains keep on coming, and coming.

I bench pressed two 75 pound DUMBBELLS! :woo:
I gained mass. I'm now 152 lbs. I remember I used to be like 115.

I went from 145 lb. to 152 lb! WoO!

Hung out with some friends... went to the beach... work out... going to invest in the stock market... hoping to make some profit.... and I'm having a great time!!

Nothing is really fu'cked up. It's all in my head. It's a great learning experience. In fact, I need to thank her... :crackup:

She tried to control me. It worked. She tried to tame me. It worked.

But, that's it. I am who I am. Women, be prepared for ME; not visa versa.

P.S. USA v GHANA in the world cup at 10 am EST... root for team USA!!!!

 

[dannowillbookem]

contender, this is inspiring. i made my own thread like this (why the hell should you have all the fun?) and im going to change things. ive been wanting to for a long time, but i have finally realized they arent gonna change themselves. i ened to take action.

to be a man, he must do something. to be a woman, she simply bleeds.
-pook

 

[Contender]

Complete Status Report.

Well, guys it has been a long month. A tough battle. A forum member posted warning me that it will be difficult until I hold out for a month, or so, in order to develop these changes into habit.

Well, after One Month (approx.) I will post the entire update.

- I do not take care of my body.
- I do not eat “right.”
- I do not take care of my appearance; I let myself be “ugly.”
- I’m a pushover.
- I’m shy.
- I am gullible.
- I am lazy.
- I am not in shape (or at least, I’m not lean and muscular enough to my liking)
- Did I mention I’m lazy? I through my entire High School career down the drain. I had no social life; and my academic achievements suck with only one exception – with my leadership, I carried my school to win its very first Mock Trial competition, ever. I was the Captain; but believe, me I had “bad” moments. I held back. I was timid. I did EVERYTHING WRONG!
- You name it and it’s most likely my flaw.... need I continue?

I'm a complete "AFC" and worse.

Well, let's see how I've done...

I took a shower at least twice a day - sometimes more, if I went to the beach that day.

I wash my face regularly - no more pimples.

I floss and brush after each meal (or as soon possible after my meals).

I keep some mints with me to avoid bad breath after my meals on dates, and such.

I bought some hot, new cologne.

I went shopping. I have a nice wardrobe. But, I am always going to improve it.

My dad is giving me a bunch of money to invest in stocks. If I profit... $$$$$$$$ for whatever I want! So, I'm going to invest wisely!
Does anyone here invest? Which firm is the best to work with - with the cheapest commission? I will work the stocks solo.

I'm taking my motorcycle permit next month. Once I buy my own motorcycle (Yamaha R6), I'll go for the road test with it.

I convinced my father to continue to financially support me throughout college - so I have a decent income per month. I can maintain a vehicle/motorcycle (including insurance, and gas) and some extra cash for clothes, dates, and such.

I am challenging myself mentally and physically - reading, studying, and hitting the gym.

I am eating healthy! I am eating regularly. I am making protein shakes. I am taking a sh'tload of protein, carbs and vitamins. I'm on my way to physical perfection. I lost most of my abdominal flab!

Some chick at the beach assumed I work out at the gym. So, clearly I've improved my physique. Some old relatives saw me on the street. They called my mother later that day, and told her that I've gotten more muscular. :woo:

A friend of mine talked sh't behind my back - according to undisclosed sources. However, according to my new policy to not take people's word seriously... I discovered the truth through my own eyes. I am not longer gullible. I think twice before accepting anyone's comments. I THINK!

It became evident that he really did talk sh't to get this girl to lose interest in me. After that, me and him are through. I do not tolerate it.
You're either my friend, or not.

THIS is my LIFE. My little WORLD. You don't like me; get the fu'ck out of here.

I will not stand for sh't. Life is to enjoy; to pursue one's passions and spend time with cool people. Time is the best test, of anything - relationships, honesty, etc.

I am keeping good hygiene. I am approaching women, confidently. I am working out. I am eating right. I am keeping myself busy.

There is no pressure to find women. My life does NOT revolve around the opposite sex. I do whatever I WANT to do. I see a hot woman at the beach, I'll say hi. And, I'll enjoy the conversation.

I'll just have a good time. I'll go with the flow. It'll always end up well, as long as you have a good time - that's what I aim for.

Just HAVE FUN. Be Happy. Stay healthy. and Live. Live a life of no regrets.

I think I'm well on my way... sure I passed up some opportunities in the past, but that was then. This is NOW. No more regrets.

I am living on the edge. I want something.. I'll try to get it. If something does not work out... oh well, MOVing on.

It's worse to walk past a beautiful woman, than say "Hi." By saying "Hi" one opens up more possibilities. By walking by, you are passing by everything we stand for.

Yes, I made mistakes over the past month. But, without falling how can we learn?

Look up to the future, and glance back to learn, and beam with confidence at how far we have gone.

I've meet with so many women over this month than I did in my entire life. No, I did not have sex; make-out or do anything sexual. But, so what? Life isn't about sex. It's about having a good time - everything else follows.

I had so much fun. I even laughed at my follies. This is turning out to be an awesome summer.

I'm glad I began this change now, than when I'm 35. I feel a cleansed. I feel new.

I go outside everyday looking around for a challenge. I go to the weight-room and lift to challenge myself.

The easy way out is for pus'sies. I see a beautiful woman down the street - I want to turn away and walk by, but "I'm CONTENDER." I will not throw away all that I've worked for. I will live for the moment. "Hi," I said...

Regardless of the outcome, I was proud that I gathered up all that confidence to say "Hi." Imagine the possibilities.

I am a Contender! I will never stop fighting for perfection.

Self-improvement is a life long pursuit; a life long challenge. Are you up for it?

I AM! :box:

Cheers to progress and my future endevors (from my hobbies [surfing, snowboarding], women, college, to my ultimate career).

 

[DogFashionDisco]

dude, you rock!!!!


this has inspired me to go full throttle on improving myself. no more excuses. no more distractions. no more bull****.

 

[proteinshake]

this is awesome man, im really motivated by reading this. i took control of my appearence at a very young age and made leaps in progress and now i almost wish i could find more flaws in myself to improve apon. there is one thing im still searching for however and it seems like youve already found it, this thing is balance. no matter how hard i try i cannot balance my life, i get tunnel vision and i can only focus on one thing at a time while everything else falls apart, one month it will be a sport, the next month girls, then fittness, and then getting messed up and partying ect.

 

[Contender]

this is awesome man, im really motivated by reading this. i took control of my appearence at a very young age and made leaps in progress and now i almost wish i could find more flaws in myself to improve apon. there is one thing im still searching for however and it seems like youve already found it, this thing is balance. no matter how hard i try i cannot balance my life, i get tunnel vision and i can only focus on one thing at a time while everything else falls apart, one month it will be a sport, the next month girls, then fittness, and then getting messed up and partying ect.

I'm typing right now, while drinking a Protein shake; I find that a bit ironic.

proteinshake, try writing up a daily schedule for yourself. Do not live by it - minute per minute - however, let it serve as a guidline; make sure you complete everything on the list.

Example:

Monday

-Workout
-Study for tomorrow's test
-Date with girl
-Party

Of course, it should be more detailed. I broke up my schedule per hour. I didn't kill myself if I couldn't do something at 11:00 AM, but I made sure everything was done by the end of the day. By the time the month was over, I realized I didn't need that sheet of paper hanging by my bed anymore.

I developed it - the habit of having a healthy balance of everything; ANYTHING in extreme is bad - even the 'good' things.

 

[Contender]

Status Report

Remember the girl that I fuc'ked up with? She called me today, and invited me to go to the beach.

See, never lose faith in yourself. I am the man. I knew it, even after she "owned" me; however, I remain on top.

I told her I would love to, but I'm busy now. She said, "okay, how about in an hour." I said, it's good.



And, the cool thing is, I really was busy.

I had two "dates" today. Went to a girls house to watch the USA v Ghana game. And I have another date, with another girl, towards the evening - I met this girl randomly on the street. Yes, I approached!

And, I got the digits!!!

 

[dannowillbookem]

goddamnit contender youre making me insane with all the changes i need to make. my life has become shiit...sure at one point it was much better, but now its awful. my resolve is tougher. i will approach that random girl on the street. i will say hello to the pretty chick in the store. i will keep a to do list by my bed. i will help others when i have nothing else to do. infact i think i'll go find a way to help others now. peace.

 

[Contender]

goddamnit contender youre making me insane with all the changes i need to make. my life has become shiit...sure at one point it was much better, but now its awful. my resolve is tougher. i will approach that random girl on the street. i will say hello to the pretty chick in the store. i will keep a to do list by my bed. i will help others when i have nothing else to do. infact i think i'll go find a way to help others now. peace.

All you need is a plan, and the willpower to follow through with it. Write one up, and let's take this world by storm.

Dude, I don't know how I changed so fast. It's like I unleashed myself out into the world; as if, I chained and suppressed my true nature for years and years.

I just loosened up, and I was myself around the women. Sure, I cracked some stupid jokes... it happens, but I didn't let it get to me at all. We had a great time!

I walked away leaving her laughing for a good two minutes on the corner - I made a cute joke before leaving. Now, that's an excellent exist.

Just go out there to have a good time, not because "We must have sex." Sex is overrated. It's easier to have sex, but it's harder to simply have a good time.

I had a better time today than I ever did in my life - just spending some time with a hot chick... alone at the beach. Did I mention she had a hot, hot body?

Oh, and I was very self-conscience of my body... I thought my stomach was too flabby, and I was too skinny. But, she saw it differently. She thought I go to the gym (and I do go... I started recently). She said I'm very buff, with a sexy build.

But, regardless of the positive outcome, I put myself out there. I decided not to let my fear control me. F'ck it, I'm going out to have a fu'cking good time! And, I did.

The biggest change... the biggest leap in improvement starts internally.

[Edit] But the really bad news.... USA lost to Ghana!

 

[Contender]

Another Update

I think I'm developing one-itis for this girl... Like, I'm starting to look at the college at I'm going to with disdain; I look at her school, and I'm thinking... why didn't I decide to go there instead... I could be with her that way.

I don't know if it's one-itis, come to think of it. I'm starting to miss her at the thought of not seeing her for a year. We really had some good times at the beach, and when we strolled around the city - hanging out with her, and her friends.

Wow, it's funny how when it all boils down to it... I am actually sad to leave High School. I hate my school, but the people here and in the nearby area aren't so bad. I met a cool chick.

Good memories are nice to have... I hope I'll see her again.

The funny thing is... summer has just started, and I'm already upset. Don't worry, I'm not letting it get to me. It's when I'm alone these thoughts creep in.

Haha, I'm really going to miss her and her friends. They were some of the coolest people I met to date.

 

[Contender]

I had to bump this thanks to the "KKKKKKKKKK" threads.

 

[Potbelly]

dude....two 75 lb dumbbells...HOLY SHIIIEETTT

nice nice props for that fast ass gains man

 

[Zerix]

Contender, you are a ****in huge inspiration. SO many times when I look at my flaws, decide I shall change, but I don't, or I start and quit when **** gets tough. Damn, I'm so going to make a plan for myself now, and hopefully you keep posting here and keeping this page updated I'd love to read more and get motivated after each read! You are awesome.

 

[dreamxhenry]

So 2 days after getting this HB8.8\'s number I called her.
I messed up sooo bad! not even funny i confused myself
but atleast i called her.

LOSER,lolz

 

[Mr_rogers]

LOSER,lolz

When was the last time you called a girl?

Before you go calling someone on their mistakes, maybe you should make sure you can actually do better.

 

[Contender]

dude....two 75 lb dumbbells...HOLY SHIIIEETTT

nice nice props for that fast ass gains man

I just weighed myself - I stand at 153 lb. now.

153 from 148 (approx); not bad, not bad!

Contender, you are a ****in huge inspiration. SO many times when I look at my flaws, decide I shall change, but I don't, or I start and quit when **** gets tough. Damn, I'm so going to make a plan for myself now, and hopefully you keep posting here and keeping this page updated I'd love to read more and get motivated after each read! You are awesome.

Thanks. Feel free to post your results in here, too. We can do this together!

So 2 days after getting this HB8.8's number I called her.
I messed up sooo bad! not even funny i confused myself
but atleast i called her.

It would be a wasted effort if you DIDN'T learn anything from it. If you came out of that ordeal knowing more than you did before you called her, consider it a success!

Experiences shape who we are, and become; get the best out of each and every experience.

tell me about it! i've never been that nervous talking to girls.
i've had a crappy few weeks and wasn't in the right mindset!
maybe i should of wrote down what i was gonna say but
she gave me her number cause she's comfortable with talking
to me, i just wasn't comfortable talking to her.

i've got 2 numbers these past 3 days! yeah!

Congrats... and do not pressure yourself. Whenever I pressured myself, that's how I f'ed up - i.e. the phone convo with that girl I met at the beach; luckily, my charm from our little hangout persevered.

 

[Contender]

6/25/06: Update

What's new?

Well, do you remember the time I went to the beach with that girl? Well, her friend, whom I met at the beach also - they were all together - found out, and she's jealous.

She was like how come you didn't invite me; why did you go to the beach without me.

So, now I'm wondering what to do with her. Both girls are fun to be around; I want to hang out with both. Seperate, or together, I can handle it. I did it before.

Any ideas? Should I call her, or what? I don't know how to approach this scenario. I am inexperienced; help me out guys.

----

Secondly, I went to a party. Let me wrap it up simply. I came in. I danced. I drank a little. I danced, and not alone. I touched her...kino... she was all over me.

Kiss Close! And, I came home at 5 am. hehe.

That's the abridged version. But it was successful. I saved the day a couple of times... helped organize the drunk crowd.... helped restore the house to proper order before the parents arrived... and of course I had a good time... with great results

[edit] I saw some pictures from the party... and I don't look so skinny anymore. I have some muscle. WoO!

 

[Contender]

6/27/2006: Update

As of tomorrow, I've officially graduated from High School! :woo:

Lately, I've been having some pretty bad days. I was confused as to my motivations. I felt pressured to approach women, and I felt like sh't whenever I didn't talk. I had this urge to TALK to everyone... for some reason, I suppressed it.

So, I had a bad couple of days. But, now I'm feeling better. I'm starting to develop my own approaching style - a casual approach; next time I go out - when I'm not with a girl - I will approach.

I will post the daily field reports. My casual approach throws away the rule book. I don't need guidelines. I don't need to be told what to say and what I can't say. I'll figure that out through experience. I'm going to formulate my own rules, because I am a different person.

Starting tomorrow, I'm going to add a mission to my daily routine of self-improvement. On top of improving my mental and physical aspects, I will improve my 'game.' I will combat my shyness and build up my confidence by facing my fear. I will approach at least one woman per day.

I'm starting my own Boot Camp. For the next two weeks, I will focus on approaching 14 women. I may prolong it, or move on depending on my progress. So, stay tuned.

Tonight is a special night, however. I think I might lose my virginity tonight. :cheer:

Remember the girl who I fu'ked up my chances with? Well, it's actually working out. I got a second chance to redeem myself. I cleverly asked her out, and she said something alone of the lines of whose coming or whatever.

I said just you and me, and I winked. She replied where and whose bed. lol.

I did something right.

I'll update how this evening goes.

P.S. Please give me advice to get her to my house. What should I do on the date? Should we go out or should I say let's cut the foreplay b'tch and come over now.

And when it comes down to sex, will I last longer if I jack off now? What should I do?

She's older than me; she has more experience.

If I can successfully fu'ck THIS GIRL; I can fuc'k anyone.

 

[Mr_rogers]

I'd say that you should go out. Get her all excited and everything, make her want you BAD, even more than she already does. I know that you want to make your own rules through experience, but I think you should take a look at the DJ Bible for the whole sex topic. I'm sure that it'll tell you a few things. One thing that I know is this: FOREPLAY IS GOOD, lol. Make sure to use it.

 

[Contender]

I'd say that you should go out. Get her all excited and everything, make her want you BAD, even more than she already does. I know that you want to make your own rules through experience, but I think you should take a look at the DJ Bible for the whole sex topic. I'm sure that it'll tell you a few things. One thing that I know is this: FOREPLAY IS GOOD, lol. Make sure to use it.

But, maybe she was just flirting. Do you think she's serious? And, regardless... how should I get her over? Or, how should I get myself to her place?

What should I do on the date? Eat, go play pool, and then walk to my house by taking the route by the beach? Maybe, do something stupid and get both of us wet, and like **** around on the beach... build excitement, then move to my house?

Should I just make a move randomly? Aggressively, but not forcefully (obviously). Sounds good?

[edit] Going to check out the sex topic in the dj bible. thanks for reminding me about that.

[edit 1] read it... it's pretty basic. it doesn't help me. i know how to do foreplay and ****. i can give her a sensual massage while kissing her, and tease her....
i think i get it.