Bokanovsky
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2012
- Messages
- 4,685
- Reaction score
- 4,293
Imagine that you go out for drinks with a girl you met online. The moment you see her in real life, a sense of disappointment washes over you, as you realize that she does not look quite the way you thought she would based on her pictures. You already know what you're going to do...have one drink, talk about some B.S. for an hour or so, then come up with an excuse why you need to leave early. And never talk to her again. During that one hour though, something interesting will happen to your demeanour. No attempts would be made to impress your date...there will be no worrying about saying something that she might disapprove of...and no awkward moments caused by shyness. In other words, you would become naturally confident because you have nothing to lose.
In this particular example, the source of confidence is lack of attraction. But it doesn't have to be. Let's say you find your date attractive but you have 5 other equally hot girls that you could be banging. Whether or not you succeed with this particular female is immaterial because you have so many options. Or say you have so much sh!t going on in your life at the moment that getting laid is the least of your concerns. In all of these situations, you will find yourself feeling more confident that you normally would because you simply don't care about the outcome all that much. And that is the essence of confidence.
In this particular example, the source of confidence is lack of attraction. But it doesn't have to be. Let's say you find your date attractive but you have 5 other equally hot girls that you could be banging. Whether or not you succeed with this particular female is immaterial because you have so many options. Or say you have so much sh!t going on in your life at the moment that getting laid is the least of your concerns. In all of these situations, you will find yourself feeling more confident that you normally would because you simply don't care about the outcome all that much. And that is the essence of confidence.