Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Complicated @ the Academy

Twist of Cain

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We've been on and off for 3 years. I'm 28, her 22. blonde, 9, bartender etc..

She dumped me over the holidays, 3 weeks later she contacts me while I'm on course in the military..

we see each other, then she goes hot and cold. it's been rinse and repeat like this for 3 months..

I'm in Police Academy, an hour tops from her place. We saw each other a few times right up until I left for the Academy. She initiated both times.

When we parted on the final day, she kissed me on the cheek (in public as I was seeing her off in the subway) I said no, lips - we did, she said "text me".. I said no ___, you text me.. you text me." Dead eyes at her, making my intentions known that I won't be chasing you, or following your lead..

She knew that I'd be confined to base for 3 weeks, then I'll be allowed weekends off.

We parted april 3 i think.. it was a Saturday - awkwardly saw some of her friends at the club I used to bounce at, that night - I was there for the free booze I get when I'm there etc..

This may have been a factor, or not, however, being confined to base, without any decent tail in miles...

..and no text from her. nothing. more games on her end, i'm assuming.

she's insecure etc.. either she's holding out for me to initiate a text, because she did the past few times - she found another guy - or she lost interest.

the times we hung out previous to leaving for the academy were totally fine imo.. yet here I am - big time depressed when I'm alone. more lonely than anything - weekends are the worst, holy sh!t.. 2 remaining until weekends off..

should i shoot out a text, indifferent in nature, almost dismissive, saying something like "predicate the text, classy."

This is a bad emotional drug I'm getting out of me..
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Peaks&Valleys

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Twist of Cain said:
I said no ___, you text me.. you text me." Dead eyes at her, making my intentions known that I won't be chasing you, or following your lead...
Besides sounding childish, you're setting yourself up for a lose/lose situation.
 

hithard

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Ween yourself off her. Hate fuc.king, mismatched and a whole lot of oneitis, you are not in love you are just possessive. Is it a self-confidence issue where you think this is the only girl you can get?
Is/was this your first serious relationship?
A lot of bodybuilders(think you mentioned you were one) I know have zero game ability.
 

Twist of Cain

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im fine with game. more don draper with strong eye contact and slow speech..

it is what it is. im doing my thing, progressing as a man - this is a hinderance that im allowing - im thinking i may have played it too indifferently, thats why im going back & forth

ive ltr'd with a model before her - my weakness is oneitis due to childhood sh!t, being ignored etc..

yup - have a pretty embarrassing history w her on this site. but its the internet so im cool putting it out there
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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zekko

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Twist of Cain said:
she said "text me".. I said no ___, you text me.. you text me." Dead eyes at her, making my intentions known that I won't be chasing you, or following your lead.
If she's an HB9, 22 years old, and a bartender, I'm sure she's getting multiple offers every day. She must have a lot of options. It strikes me that you are playing pretty heavy hardball with her, and she can't miss that either.

Why should she stay with you when I'm sure she can find someone else willing to give a little bit here and there? It's one thing to not be needy, but she has to get SOMETHING out of the relationship.

Having said that, I would not consider a 22 year old bartender for a potential LTR. Very bad risk.
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Twist of Cain,
I would be flattered if a hot Bar Girl ever fancied me...I would maximise whatever opportunity she offered,but as for considering her LTR material,Oh don't be a Masochist,she is too smart and in an ideal place to lead you a constant Dance...Keep her at Arms length,spin more Plates!
 

Twist of Cain

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@ zekko. youre saying i should shoot a text..?

ex: I forgot, are we fighting and most importantly am I winning? 

or: i just met your twin
 
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