"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Cold Approaching At The Age Of 40, Need Advice From All DJS?

soulforge

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Recently I have decided to make a bigger effort in cold approaching woman.

In the past pretty much all of the woman I have dated, have either been from online or from the odd night out clubs/bars.

The city in which I work, has so many hot woman, pretty much everywhere you look. I feel like I am missing out on so much potential puzzy by not approaching these chicks.

There are hot chicks in my gym, at the shopping centre, and generally out and about shopping in the city centre!

I guess I feel awkward about approaching woman, so I have some questions that I could really do with answering from you experienced guy.


  1. Cold approaching females in the street, at the age of 40, is this considered creepy? Lol

  2. Tips and advice on how to start a conversation?

  3. How to get her number?

  4. And how to deal with regular rejection?

  5. Do I need a wingman or go solo?
Any other advice you can give me, will be appreciated.. Thanks guys!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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ChristopherColumbus

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I think it is commendable that you are doing this and getting off-line.

The singular most important pieces of advice I'd give is to first make yourself available and then look for the IOI.

So you go to the kind of place that you like to go [for me it's the coffee shops], and then if you notice a lady noticing you, you respond. It's more like a warm approach.

Forget all the silly 20 year old man's game, and tailor it to you.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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Here's an anecdote.

A few weeks ago, I sat myself down at a coffee shop window seat. Was checking my emails, and a girl sat down right next to me. She was totally immersed in her smart phone. I opened with 'You look busy'... we chatted. Swapped numbers. She messaged to meet, a bit of back and forth. And then she decided to drop out for some reason and have her friend meet me instead.

Met this other girl, who was cute and enthusiastic. She just texted me [I can't be bothered chasing] and organized to meet me again in a couple of days.

This is the kind of interaction I enjoy. Where the women are moving things forward. The lazy man's way... ha ha
 

bigneil

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Cold approaching females in the street, at the age of 40, is this considered creepy? Lol
- To some women it is, so you only approach women who give buying signals. Same as any situation. I feel younger at 47 than I did at 40 to be honest. I feel no shame flirting with 18 year old women. My friend can't believe it because he sees me seduce women who are 45 and their daughters. Treat all women the same.

Tips and advice on how to start a conversation?
- Don't open with a compliment. Just mention something about the environment. The pattern on their purse. Ask for the time. Let them look you in the eyes and then it will be based on chemistry if she likes you.

How to get her number?
- Build rapport. Ask 'Are you single?'. If she says yes, say "Write your number down" - I prefer they write it on a napkin versus entering it. Never give out your number or a card. Ever.

And how to deal with regular rejection?
- Work out more.

Do I need a wingman or go solo?
- Solo works best for me
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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