Cold approach problem: lacking thrust

anonymous12345

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 23, 2021
Messages
468
Reaction score
175
Age
39
Location
Sweden
When it comes to intuitive, unprepared approaches I almost always fail, except for with asians. This is imperative, if I decide "this walk I'm gonna cold approach", it goes fine, it's the unprepared ones I fail. In bed I’m absolutely fine with dominance, but it’s as if I lack the energy or “air” for doing these approaches, and the girl passes me there on the street.

It’s not anxiety or stress (the typical approach anxiety), it’s a lack of dominance. It feels like I can’t “win” over her, and I’m left in some bland helplessness. After some meters/time I realise that I’ve missed and have distress. It's as if I have a blackout, not thinking, not perceiving, during the time the approach can be done and I wake up afterwards.

One thought is that it’s related to me being introvert, but it’s not that much, maybe 50% or so.

Any thoughts on a solution?
 
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
5,127
Reaction score
4,311
It’s not anxiety or stress (the typical approach anxiety), it’s a lack of dominance. It feels like I can’t “win” over her, and I’m left in some bland helplessness. After some meters/time I realise that I’ve missed and have distress. It's as if I have a blackout, not thinking, not perceiving, during the time the approach can be done and I wake up afterwards.
Walk around like your spirit animal.
 

anonymous12345

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 23, 2021
Messages
468
Reaction score
175
Age
39
Location
Sweden
Works for me.
Wolf is an animal that is crucial to me. In one critical period in my life I looked myself in the mirror, and saw it sneer at me. I got scared as hell. A hallucination or whatever you'd call it.

First hit from on Google says the wolf signify "intelligence, instincts, and freedom." I got many such attributes but could get better on the killer instinct.

How do you practically carry being your spirit animal?
 
Last edited:

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
13,737
Reaction score
14,605
When it comes to intuitive, unprepared approaches I almost always fail, except for with asians. This is imperative, if I decide "this walk I'm gonna cold approach", it goes fine, it's the unprepared ones I fail. In bed I’m absolutely fine with dominance, but it’s as if I lack the energy or “air” for doing these approaches, and the girl passes me there on the street.

It’s not anxiety or stress (the typical approach anxiety), it’s a lack of dominance. It feels like I can’t “win” over her, and I’m left in some bland helplessness. After some meters/time I realise that I’ve missed and have distress. It's as if I have a blackout, not thinking, not perceiving, during the time the approach can be done and I wake up afterwards.

One thought is that it’s related to me being introvert, but it’s not that much, maybe 50% or so.

Any thoughts on a solution?
Realize this is all in your mind and then be determined to change this. Without this willingness nothing will help.

You are your own worst enemy at this point.
 
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
5,127
Reaction score
4,311
How do you practically carry being your spirit animal?
I behave like a tomcat. Always on the prowl to drag kittens to my lair.

(That I carry a tomcat around is just happenstance. He got used to riding my shoulder when I had to carry him with me through Prague for six days. Back in Amsterdam I just continued taking him everywhere.)
 
Top