amazingswayze
Master Don Juan
i've had a lot on my mind lately. i've been thinking about what could've, should've been. i've been thinking maybe if i was raised differently things would be better. this isn't a positive mindset i know, but from time to time, i reminisce.
i used to play youth league football from 4th grade to 6th grade. i was a beast on defense. i fell in love with the game. after my mom got sick in 6th grade, she couldn't take me to practice anymore.
we were finally allowed to play sports for the school in 7th grade. i tried out for football. the first day was way too intense for me. i couldn't keep up with the others. i was fat. i was always last on the line. i was so sore the next day that i didn't come to practice. tryouts felt impossible. just like that, i missed my chance at the football team.
later that year, i tried out for basketball. same thing happened. i was out of shape, barely athletic. i almost passed out on the gym floor. i was getting dizzy. i stuck with basketball tryouts the entire week though. at the end of the week, i looked for my name on the wall by the gym. did i make the team? no.
i didn't make the basketball team in 10th grade either.
i wanted to play sports so badly. i wonder how things would've been. maybe i would've been popular in high school, maybe i would've stopped being shy, and had more fun with my peers.
i wish i found my love for music earlier.
i didn't start rapping until 1 year ago, when my future was basically decided already. i'm going to college for nursing now. this is how things are gonna be, i guess. i wish i was a natural born leader. i wish i grabbed the world by the balls when i was younger. i wish i understood the things i know nowadays.
i'm trying to be alpha. i want to be a man. the best man i can be, loving life. right now, i'm not at that point. not at all.
all this makes me wonder, what does your childhood have to do with the present? does it determine your personality? your status? this post might seem pointless but it's been on my mind lately. gotta let it out.
my upbringing was quite beta if you ask me. i'm trying to make something for myself. i understand so much more about life now.
i used to play youth league football from 4th grade to 6th grade. i was a beast on defense. i fell in love with the game. after my mom got sick in 6th grade, she couldn't take me to practice anymore.
we were finally allowed to play sports for the school in 7th grade. i tried out for football. the first day was way too intense for me. i couldn't keep up with the others. i was fat. i was always last on the line. i was so sore the next day that i didn't come to practice. tryouts felt impossible. just like that, i missed my chance at the football team.
later that year, i tried out for basketball. same thing happened. i was out of shape, barely athletic. i almost passed out on the gym floor. i was getting dizzy. i stuck with basketball tryouts the entire week though. at the end of the week, i looked for my name on the wall by the gym. did i make the team? no.
i didn't make the basketball team in 10th grade either.
i wanted to play sports so badly. i wonder how things would've been. maybe i would've been popular in high school, maybe i would've stopped being shy, and had more fun with my peers.
i wish i found my love for music earlier.
i didn't start rapping until 1 year ago, when my future was basically decided already. i'm going to college for nursing now. this is how things are gonna be, i guess. i wish i was a natural born leader. i wish i grabbed the world by the balls when i was younger. i wish i understood the things i know nowadays.
i'm trying to be alpha. i want to be a man. the best man i can be, loving life. right now, i'm not at that point. not at all.
all this makes me wonder, what does your childhood have to do with the present? does it determine your personality? your status? this post might seem pointless but it's been on my mind lately. gotta let it out.
my upbringing was quite beta if you ask me. i'm trying to make something for myself. i understand so much more about life now.