"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Chick has boyfriend, is blowing up my phone and Facebook

expos

Master Don Juan
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OK...I'm spinning plates with three girls. Maybe a 4th if I play my cards right. One of things I notice is that more you spin plates, the less time you have to pay attention to all of them, thus making you seem like you don't care, which drives them crazy.

So anyways, this one girl has a boyfriend. She is 25 and I'm 34. The thing is that her boyfriend lives two states away and travels, so she has Skype dates with this guy to make up for lost time. Yeah, that sounds like it's really going to last.

When I first met her, I thought she was sort of cute. We talked a little online and I secured a wine/movie date with her. Total FZ stuff, at least, that's how I came off to her. A few weeks later, her and I meet up and have coffee and have this long, drawn out conversation about relationships. I really showed myself and painted myself as valuable.

A week passes and I ask to meet her for dinner. I call her, she doesn't answer. She flakes and texts me that she can't. I don't respond.

My birthday was this past week, she texts me a birthday greeting and I tell her thanks...nothing more. This week, she starts liking my Facebook photos, posts, etc, but she can see that I have another girl who is blowing up my wall with sweet stuff and compliments. I am now valuable, but I'm giving her nothing back.

She just texted me tonight to talk about Boston Marathon tragedy....I haven't responded at all.

Now, it might be time to make a move and get this girl out of the friend zone.

Or --- what is girl trying to do with me if she has a boyfriend already?

Advice?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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expos

Master Don Juan
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bump - needs opinions. Thinking about making a move on this one....
 

AmIAFC

Senior Don Juan
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Thing is, she never returned your early gesture of inviting her. She rejected it, and then subsequently maintained a diet of conversation with you that was only agreeable to her. She never invited you to hang out after that flake. No action, just all talk/texting.

Invite her again, except to something a little less intimate than dinner so as not to alert her - say, happy hour or drinks at a nearby bar. If she rejects your invitation again, move on; if she gives you the green light, hang out and escalate from there.
 
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