"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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chick from school

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cyjay201

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Hey guys. I'm going to be a freshman at a school out east this summer. While I was there for orientation, a HB 9 had trouble opening her dorm room, as I walked by she started whining about how cold it was and how she needed her sweatshirt. Then she asked for my help. After opening the door we had a small conversation, she was turning bright red and was playing with her hair a lot. (I love it when they get all flustered.)

Anyway half-way through the conversation i got **** blocked by my friend, who was looking for me. So I said goodbye and left.

The next day I caught her staring at me from afar numerous times, which basically indicates a high IL. When I left she found me and said goodbye to me before I left.

In any other situation I would have gotten her #, but considering I live in the midwest and she lives on the East Coast I determined that it was pointless. (At least until I get back to school)

Now here's where the real question comes in.

I saw her on thefacebook.com, and under her relationship status it says single. I have not messaged her or anything, b/c I am strictly against talking online with girls I want to get with.

In this situation, considering I live halfway across the country, do you think it would be in my best interest to send her a message? Or just wait til I go to school to get with her. (PS we're in the same dorm)

Your comments are needed.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Desdinova

Desdinova

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In this situation, considering I live halfway across the country, do you think it would be in my best interest to send her a message?
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Talk to her directly and get her number! If you send her a message out of the blue, you'll come off as creepy. Your success will be better if you do things in person. Just approach her next time you see her and initiate conversation with her. She already knows you exist.
 
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MidnightResistance

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So what if it's a LDR. Make her a booty call.
 
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cyjay201

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Originally posted by Guitar_Whizz
You should be posting in the high school forum.
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Yeah I should be, but you know what i noticed? The advice from there is not nearly as high caliber as the advice is from here. So forgive me if I'm "under-aged" and not allowed to post on these boards...:down:

Desdinova, thanks. That's what I was thinking, and I will see her around a lot when college starts.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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diablo

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Originally posted by Guitar_Whizz
You should be posting in the high school forum.
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Sounds to me like he's discussing college matters - orientation, dorm rooms, thefacebook... :rolleyes: Des's advice is spot-on.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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