"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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chasing girl with boyfriend

zemaj

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Firstly, I have not even spoke to this girl. I just see her in this bar that I go to most weekends. And although she is with her boyfriend, there is HEAVY eye contact between me and her. I badly want to talk to her, not neccesarily to attempt to steal her from this guy, but I just want to see what shes like, and maybe even be friends with her. theres just something about her which i find compelling!

So, how can I realistically talk to her if shes with her b.f. should I wait until he leaves (goes to toilet) or just try talking to both of them or what!?

argh. very tough situation!

replies appreciated.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Dergz

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Its kinda difficult the situation u in but hey, where theres a will theres a way right?
Just go over there, say smething like 'Hey wassup, my name's X, d'yu mind if i join yu guys for a chat?' or something like that, then talk to both of them about watever subject yu suppose might be interesting, during the convo try n pick up any subtle signs of interest from the gurl, be the one to end the interaction, not them. When yu leave, make it look like u wanna go do something else - "Hey nice talkin to ya, gotta go check out my crew over there' , that way it won't look like yu came to the club just to chat to them, knowwatimsayin?
 

Tomatoes

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Are you sure they are an item?

If so....

I wouldnt go when hes there.....

1. Third wheel.
2. Its not easy to pull with her BF right next to her. You are more likely to get a negative response. (Fear of loss and so forth)

You could do it when he goes to the loo. It will look very cloak and dagger thow. If you want to play it out that way. He goes to the loo. You go over (on your way out) and ask her if she wants to meet up for some drinks sometime. Take number. Get out before hes back.....All good.

The other option is to catch her when shes there on her own. (eg. Waiting for him or something.) Approach...


Just make sure that WHEN you get that magic little opening....you take it. Dont sit back thinking of the ifs and buts......if you do...you will always just be that guy sitting at the other end of the bar wishing you were in that guys seat.

Sarge on..
 

Dergz

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i dont really dig that approach, makes yu look kinda creepy, goin ova there while they together makes u look ballsy and harmless to both of them, it also saves yu the embarrassment if she doesnt dig yu in that way, knowwatimsayin?
 

zemaj

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thanks for the advice guys. it is a real tough situation. I think i will use a combination of your advice. and just try and build up some sort of friendship, so's I can approach her whenever, and it not being weird. cheerz
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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playboy_supreme

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ly do want to waste youe time and energy on this then. go up to the both of them and open with a relationship question. make it up and just look for a responce. if nothing else u will find out if they are in a relationship or not.
 
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