Casual Talking or Flirting?

[mrgoodstuff]

True. Some girls are more clever about it than others. Like they won't flirt with other guys in front of you, so it leads you to think you're the only one. This way they build up a bunch of guys around them who think they are special in her eyes. If you watch carefully though, they'll give themselves away.

you might be the only one she's ****ing, but that doesn't mean shes not greedy for attention.

Some women FLIRT with anyone. Like I said they like all or most of the attention in the group or the room, it doesn't matter if they have a man or not. This is different. They starve for all the attention.

 

[zekko]

you might be the only one she's ****ing.

True enough, but what I meant was that some girls try to make you think you're the only guy she's flirting with - not talking about fvcking in this context. The more diabolical attention hos try not to let you see her flirt with all the other guys, because that way you will think you are special, she likes you. This way she can pile up orbiters.

On the other hand, some girls just have flirty personalities, and they don't care if you see them flirt with other guys or not.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

True enough, but what I meant was that some girls try to make you think you're the only guy she's flirting with - not talking about fvcking in this context. The more diabolical attention hos try not to let you see her flirt with all the other guys, because that way you will think you are special, she likes you. This way she can pile up orbiters.

On the other hand, some girls just have flirty personalities, and they don't care if you see them flirt with other guys or not.

Only defense is to flirt like that on them. It's not my style. I feel someone should be able to control themselves, and calibrate and not THIRST for all of the attention. In 2018 many more females are addicted to attention like crack cocaine.

 

[jaymbrs]

So in summary she has a boyfriend but agreed to go out with you to see a movie, whenever you decide to ask her. You honestly think this is just being friendly? If this was my GF and she told me she was going to a movie with a coworker who isn't gay, I would say absolutely not.

You continuing to think she's just being friendly is you trying to talk yourself out of seeing this girl for whatever reason.

 

[Logic85]

I think in a perfect world the motives would be clear and there would be no reason to question yourself. I also believe in honest communication instead of just playing the cat & mouse game or whatever you want to call it, I think it's very immature of people to do that.

The reason why I'm saying that I'm not sure is because, in the past, I've experienced things that really made want to question the persons character.


Here's one of the two stories :

One of my co-workers was really flirting with me back then, she was winking at me, touching at the shoulders from time to time, also making long talks during our break and talking about this and that, which of course would automatically will make you think that "hey she IS interested in me", but as time went on, I came to find out, her motive was 2 fold, she was trying to get me on her side because she knew that I had it good with the other girl, whom she did not like. So basically she was just trying to get me on her Team, in order to get her fired. But of course I saw that and did not play that game, which made her go mad because I figured out her whole game and I saw her for she was, a proper backstabber.

Lesson Learned Here : Girls like these would do anything it takes to achieve their goals, they plan on playing dirty, they are going to shower you with compliments, they are gonna flirt....till they get their goal.

Here's the second story:

At a bus station, a girl was always getting near to me, touching me on my shoulders, joking around, getting to know me more and more, was very frequent with the touches, as a third person seeing, you are able to say "hey, she IS flirting with you", I am not saying she was touching me sexually, but the indication of her interest was pretty high, I asked if she has plans for the weekend and if we should do something together and she said "she was busy", which was more than enough to me to know, that she only likes the attention but I gave her another chance and after 2 weeks asked her again and she said "oh my schedule is really busy for the next 3 weeks", I ask myself, if I was interested in someone, even though I was busy I would still let them know about when I'm free to schedule something together, but since she didn't, it was clear she was not interested.

The Lesson Here Was : Some girls just like to flirt, they want the attention, they want you to like them, when you give in that you are interested, thats all they wanted to have, their Ego's being stroked, these are also the girls who are like "I am very touchy feely, my family is touchy feely, I express myself like that, it's normal, I am friendly with everyone, you guys just don't know when we are being nice and take it as we are interested".

So that brings me to my current situation, in my experience if you are not sure about something or you have to ask someone (which i just did), the chances are something isn't right, either you wait it out and let the time clarify everything or you go out with your gut and say "I'm still gonna take a chance".

I am personally not gonna do anything and just keep it neutral, because I am at the point, where I hate questioning myself, because the chances are if I am questioning it, the chances are, the messages I'm receiving are very conflicted as well that makes me go on that unknown rollercoaster and by knowing myself, I eject myself pretty early in these situations.

It's just very sad to see the state of girls these days, of course not every girl is like that, there are good ones there as well, but seriously where are they, I see the same thing over and over and over again, girls cheating, losing interest, finding someone new (which was mentioned in this thread as branch swinging), no wonder cheating and the rate of divorce is high these days.

 

[jaymbrs]

I think in a perfect world the motives would be clear and there would be no reason to question yourself. I also believe in honest communication instead of just playing the cat & mouse game or whatever you want to call it, I think it's very immature of people to do that.

The reason why I'm saying that I'm not sure is because, in the past, I've experienced things that really made want to question the persons character.


Here's one of the two stories :

One of my co-workers was really flirting with me back then, she was winking at me, touching at the shoulders from time to time, also making long talks during our break and talking about this and that, which of course would automatically will make you think that "hey she IS interested in me", but as time went on, I came to find out, her motive was 2 fold, she was trying to get me on her side because she knew that I had it good with the other girl, whom she did not like. So basically she was just trying to get me on her Team, in order to get her fired. But of course I saw that and did not play that game, which made her go mad because I figured out her whole game and I saw her for she was, a proper backstabber.

Lesson Learned Here : Girls like these would do anything it takes to achieve their goals, they plan on playing dirty, they are going to shower you with compliments, they are gonna flirt....till they get their goal.

Here's the second story:

At a bus station, a girl was always getting near to me, touching me on my shoulders, joking around, getting to know me more and more, was very frequent with the touches, as a third person seeing, you are able to say "hey, she IS flirting with you", I am not saying she was touching me sexually, but the indication of her interest was pretty high, I asked if she has plans for the weekend and if we should do something together and she said "she was busy", which was more than enough to me to know, that she only likes the attention but I gave her another chance and after 2 weeks asked her again and she said "oh my schedule is really busy for the next 3 weeks", I ask myself, if I was interested in someone, even though I was busy I would still let them know about when I'm free to schedule something together, but since she didn't, it was clear she was not interested.

The Lesson Here Was : Some girls just like to flirt, they want the attention, they want you to like them, when you give in that you are interested, thats all they wanted to have, their Ego's being stroked, these are also the girls who are like "I am very touchy feely, my family is touchy feely, I express myself like that, it's normal, I am friendly with everyone, you guys just don't know when we are being nice and take it as we are interested".

So that brings me to my current situation, in my experience if you are not sure about something or you have to ask someone (which i just did), the chances are something isn't right, either you wait it out and let the time clarify everything or you go out with your gut and say "I'm still gonna take a chance".

I am personally not gonna do anything and just keep it neutral, because I am at the point, where I hate questioning myself, because the chances are if I am questioning it, the chances are, the messages I'm receiving are very conflicted as well that makes me go on that unknown rollercoaster and by knowing myself, I eject myself pretty early in these situations.

It's just very sad to see the state of girls these days, of course not every girl is like that, there are good ones there as well, but seriously where are they, I see the same thing over and over and over again, girls cheating, losing interest, finding someone new (which was mentioned in this thread as branch swinging), no wonder cheating and the rate of divorce is high these days.

I agree with what you're saying to a point, but honestly what exactly are you losing by asking a girl out who you think is flirting with you? Nothing. If anything you're saving time that would otherwise be spent on someone who is just flirting with you for attention. I personally don't like overthinking about what a girl's intention is. I'd rather ask right away to avoid any unnecessary time and effort spent.

 

[Logic85]

Update :

I began this week working again after my vacation. I was just joking around with her and said "Since you have a broken display on your iPhone, you should ask your boyfriend to get the new iPhone X, since it's a new thing by apple to introduce an iPhone every year now".

She said to me "Will you be my boyfriend then?" (I took it as jokingly of course).

I said to her "So I need to shell out 1000 Dollars to be your boyfriend, when I can just pay half the price and get myself a Playstation 4" (jokingly of course lol).

I find some of the answers that she gives in the office extremely odd to be honest.

 

[devilkingx2]

1. She's obviously blatantly hitting on you and you're acting like a nerdy middle schooler, where's the confidence man?

2. She's obviously a slvt, because she's blatantly trying to **** guys behind her boyfriend's back, think of her and treat her accordingly. Don't committ, fall in love, get serious, treat her like a good girl, etc.

 

[Alvafe]

you should have said, so paying you 1k is enough to change boyfriend?, that is not what I like to see in a girl.

and see what she does or say

if she says she does not have a BF, then she ended or is hoping for you do the deal on her branch thing
if she tries to validade herself without mentioning the BF chances are she have him and want to check if you are a better deal
if she gets angry you get peace

try to bust woman asses more often with sarcasm, and being playfull, you would be surprised how much you can say like that

and again she IS flirting with you hard, or you ask her out or wait till the end of the year, because she works there and you are not willing to date a girl from your work, but remember till the end of year can be too late, also no one said you have to take her serious, have fun, if you can't have fun with woman what is the point?

ah yes before I forget, all jokes have some truth behind then, no one jokes about something who did not cross they mind about it, and like I said is a nice way to say things without pushing too hard

 

[Logic85]

Today she said to me "you have small hands" I was like "really?" (because I actually thought hers were smaller than mine lol), she then put her palm against mine to compare and said "look my fingers are bigger than yours" and I was like "Oh my, you are right, I better complain to my dad that I have short hands" lol and she said "I'll complain to mine too".

I said "for what, that you have bigger fingers than mine" lol.

 

[Glassguy]

Today she said to me "you have small hands" I was like "really?" (because I actually thought hers were smaller than mine lol), she then put her palm against mine to compare and said "look my fingers are bigger than yours" and I was like "Oh my, you are right, I better complain to my dad that I have short hands" lol and she said "I'll complain to mine too".

I said "for what, that you have bigger fingers than mine" lol.

Stop acting like 8th graders and get to the fvcking point dude.

"I'm going to grab a drink and chill after work. Why dont you join me".

Stop wasting time. Pump her only and watch her chase for more. There is an expiration date to ANY woman's interest. Keep ****ing around and you're only friend zoning yourself. You could have a nice regular piece of @ss plate here if you'd just be the man and make a move.

And if she pulls the BF card, you ignore that bish permanently and stop feeding her ego with attention.

 

[Logic85]

Stop acting like 8th graders and get to the fvcking point dude.

"I'm going to grab a drink and chill after work. Why dont you join me".

Stop wasting time. Pump her only and watch her chase for more. There is an expiration date to ANY woman's interest. Keep ****ing around and you're only friend zoning yourself. You could have a nice regular piece of @ss plate here if you'd just be the man and make a move.

And if she pulls the BF card, you ignore that bish permanently and stop feeding her ego with attention.

Dude calm your nerves, and stop using the curse words like a 8th grader. If you had read the post-nr. 25, it should have been clear to you where this is going.

The reason for me updating is because someone is likely to have a similar situation somewhere, they are going to read up on this thread and extract the similarities from it and come to their own conclusions about it.

What you could have contributed about is "hey if she's doing it like this, my own personal experience about it is like this" instead you are going with friend zone and God knows what.

Like I said man, this is not a race, clam down.

 

[Glassguy]

Dude calm your nerves, and stop using the curse words like a 8th grader. If you had read the post-nr. 25, it should have been clear to you where this is going.

The reason for me updating is because someone is likely to have a similar situation somewhere, they are going to read up on this thread and extract the similarities from it and come to their own conclusions about it.

What you could have contributed about is "hey if she's doing it like this, my own personal experience about it is like this" instead you are going with friend zone and God knows what.

Like I said man, this is not a race, clam down.

I get chicks (get laid) like its nobody's business. You calm down.

You came to this board for help/advice.

From my own personal experience you need to either pull the trigger or enjoy the friend zone. Or stop trying to mess around with another man's chick.

Good luck on here. No more help/advice for you.

 

[Logic85]

I get chicks (get laid) like its nobody's business. You calm down.

I stand corrected, this is not a race man, who gets laid more.

Appreciate the direct approach advice & also for the good luck.