Casual Talking or Flirting?

[Logic85]

So long story short, we have hired a temporary co-worker who is a girl till the end of this year.

She has been working with us for 3 months now, my mate likes to joke around with her, one day he went on to say ‘hey do you like this guy in the office?’ She said ‘no’ my mate asked : ‘whynot?’ To which she replied with ‘he’s not my type’, since I was listening the conversation I asked her ‘so what is your type?’ She looked at me and said ‘you’ and then went with ‘just kidding, just kidding’.

Now this past Wednesday, she asked me what my plans were for the weekend, I told her ‘that it’s too early to plan for the weekend, since we are 2 days away, but I would definitely be going to the cinema’ she asked ‘are you going with your sister?’ I said ‘no, with a mate, but he hasn’t confirmed yet’ she said ‘would you be going to the cinema alone?’ I said ‘I don’t have any problems by going to the
Cinema alone, in fact I’ve many times’.

Maybe I am thinking into this too much & considering that she’s flirting with me where she might as well be making casual talk with me, I feel conflicted with either one of those thoughts, so thought that you guys would be able to give me some insight on it.

What do you guys think?

 

[AttackFormation]

What do you guys think?

I think it's obvious that she's hitting on you, your gut knows this too, but you wanted to ask someone other than her for confirmation. We'll be glad to provide that for you. Go take her out but I would say a cinema is a poor date because you're not neither talking, looking, or touching at each other. So if you're set on the movies, get a good spot in the back and try to make her feel some sexual tension and tease her before you enter the cinema so you can keep it up during and after.

 

[IKO69]

She is displaying what is called "high interest". You would be safe in asking her out

 

[Alvafe]

I think it's obvious that she's hitting on you, your gut knows this too, but you wanted to ask someone other than her for confirmation. We'll be glad to provide that for you. Go take her out but I would say a cinema is a poor date because you're not neither talking, looking, or touching at each other. So if you're set on the movies, get a good spot in the back and try to make her feel some sexual tension and tease her before you enter the cinema so you can keep it up during and after.

I think it's obvious that she's hitting on you, your gut knows this too, but you wanted to ask someone other than her for confirmation. We'll be glad to provide that for you. Go take her out but I would say a cinema is a poor date because you're not neither talking, looking, or touching at each other. So if you're set on the movies, get a good spot in the back and try to make her feel some sexual tension and tease her before you enter the cinema so you can keep it up during and after.

well he did say he would do the cinema thing, I think its important to keep what you say up, so after the film go eat something and then play that up

also take note on one little thing guys, all jokes, have some truth on it, you don't joke about it if it didn't cross your mind, so take jokes as hints, a easy way to say what you think in a way you can evade any fallout as joking and not serious

 

[IKO69]

She is being really obvious about it too. This is about as forward as most women get when they are really into a guy, practically just short of asking them out.

 

[Billtx49]

She looked at me and said ‘you’

and then went with ‘just kidding, just kidding’.

she said ‘would you be going to the cinema alone?

Her hard hit on you

Neutralizing the severity of the hit with a joke

Her invitation for you to ask her out…

It can take some time gaining experience, but your goal is to always be in the moment with clarity.

 

[jaymbrs]

So long story short, we have hired a temporary co-worker who is a girl till the end of this year.

She has been working with us for 3 months now, my mate likes to joke around with her, one day he went on to say ‘hey do you like this guy in the office?’ She said ‘no’ my mate asked : ‘whynot?’ To which she replied with ‘he’s not my type’, since I was listening the conversation I asked her ‘so what is your type?’ She looked at me and said ‘you’ and then went with ‘just kidding, just kidding’.

Now this past Wednesday, she asked me what my plans were for the weekend, I told her ‘that it’s too early to plan for the weekend, since we are 2 days away, but I would definitely be going to the cinema’ she asked ‘are you going with your sister?’ I said ‘no, with a mate, but he hasn’t confirmed yet’ she said ‘would you be going to the cinema alone?’ I said ‘I don’t have any problems by going to the
Cinema alone, in fact I’ve many times’.

Maybe I am thinking into this too much & considering that she’s flirting with me where she might as well be making casual talk with me, I feel conflicted with either one of those thoughts, so thought that you guys would be able to give me some insight on it.

What do you guys think?

So she turns into a dude after the year is up?

Joking.

 

[Logic85]

Ha

So she turns into a dude after the year is up?

Joking.

haha my bad, what I meant to say was she would be working till the end of December with us.

Another update :

I just found out that she has a boyfriend that she’s together with for almost 4 Years? :/

Does that change the dynamics or it doesn’t really matter because she is hitting on me? :l

 

[AttackFormation]

Does that change the dynamics or it doesn’t really matter because she is hitting on me? :l

Not at all. Women line up their next boyfriend or lover before officially dropping their current one, this is called "branch swinging". They'll emotionally check out of the relationship before they break up and scout for new lovers or hit up old flames while the guy has no clue yet that she is replacing him, that's why guys (like her boyfriend) feel they got hit with the breakup "out of nowhere". Worst case scenario, you get an opportunity to work on your game. She's hitting on you and she took the vows, not you.

 

[IKO69]

The above is actually true. Last semester in one of my classes there was this girl I met, she seemed okay and appeared into me - I say that because she would ask me a lot of questions like if I had a girlfriend, why didn't I have one and so on....questions that....seemed prying and it just seemed like she was asking because there was interest. Anyway as I was getting to know her she also let slip she had a boyfriend....but the relationship was rocky and she'd sometimes tell me about it. By the end of the semester she had ended up breaking up with him (I did not instigate it at all, that's actually not really my thing) and I ended up not doing anything about it in the end. I ended up sorta being put off for reasons I won't go into and aren't necessary.......but yeah, sometimes when a girl has a boyfriend it doesn't really mean anything.

I can't say for sure if it's the case for your scenario as I am not there to observe the interactions, but just know that branch swinging is infact a "thing". They are not going outright tell you "Hey you, go out with me" while they are with their boyfriend because then you'll think poorly of them, but they'll throw out some "bait" to let you know you are a prospect.

 

[Logic85]

I have been on the receiving end of the "branch swinging" as well. My Ex-girlfriend of almost 2 years threw the "It's not you, its me" and "I am not sure about my feelings" / "I need some space" card when she was probably testing waters with someone else.

After breaking up with me, within a week she had a new and shiny boyfriend, of course this was the dude she swinged with, once confronted about it, she said "He's not the reason for what I did" yeah right.

Guess who gets in touch with me after an year long absence, yup you guessed it, her message was "just to see how you are doing", I found out through a third source that she messaged me when her relationship with the other guy fizzled, since I didn't bother replying her back, she did what she knows best, found herself another new shiny bf within a week....again lol.

That relationship of hers lasted almost a year as well, now she's on her 3rd bf after me, I think they broke up as well, but I am not interested in her at all now. So the "branch swinging" theory is quite accurate.

 

[Logic85]

Upate from yesterday :

She told me that she has seen the new Mamma Movie movie twice and asked me if I have seen it as well?

I said that I haven't seen the first one, doesn't seem like my type of film and she was like "but why, it's so good" etc.

I jokingly said "If I asked you out to see a Mamma Movie with me, you would most definitely say yes to it again right?"

She said "yes absolutely".

Then since I am going on a vacation starting tomorrow, she said "you are going to miss us during your holidays" I said "Wouldn't you miss me as well" She said "Nahhh....." and then "Of course I will".

I see a swap between being friendly and showing interest here, which makes me go unsure about the whole thing.

 

[zekko]

I see a swap between being friendly and showing interest here, which makes me go unsure about the whole thing.

Sounds flirty to me.

 

[The Diver]

Other answers options:

she asked me what my plans were for the weekend

Don't know yet but one of them is taking you out for a drink.

but I would definitely be going to the cinema’
she asked ‘are you going with your sister?’

You: No, I'm going with you.

would you be going to the cinema alone?’

I won't be alone Bcos you'll be with me.


Thinks and be bold, express your sexual intention without fear, it'll get you more pu*ssy then be polite


From The Sixteen Commandments Of Poon

XI. Be irrationally self-confident
Self-confidence, warranted or not, triggers submissive emotional responses in women. Irrational self-confidence will get you more pu*ssy than rational defeatism.



.

 

[Alvafe]

the BF thing is kinda a turn off to me actually, that is a low class thing to do, with is the norm for females, but yes dude she is hitting on you, hard even, unless you are waiting for the end of the year to try something you should do it soon

 

[Logic85]

Seems like every day there is a new update :

Today I was showing her something on the PC regarding work, I realised she brushed her fingers against me, then I looked down she was feeling my arm hair (I'm not extra hairy, but still have some arm hair) and when I looked at her she smiled, I said "well trust me they are real" lol.

Now this is something I did not expect to happen at all and yet she did it, I don't know why is there a feeling inside me thats saying she is just being friendly and I'm taking it the wrong way & also that she trusts me and is being frank with me and I might disappoint by thinking too far.

I was asking my friends at work, if we should go for Bowling on the weekend, I would invite her along as well and then ask if she would like to go to the cinema.

The thing is, as Alvafe has mentioned above, I can't take her seriously & even though she is / isn't interested in me, because in the back of my mind it isn't sitting well that she has a bf and the way she's going forward with me, automatically makes me think that there isn't something serious I should take out "IF" it turns into a relationship.

 

[Billtx49]

I realised she brushed her fingers against me, then I looked down she was feeling my arm hair

I was asking my friends at work, if we should go for Bowling on the weekend, I would invite her along as well .

It’s called kino and it’s a step beyond flirting, but to be on the safe side you should probably wait until she grabs your azz to determine her intentions…

Btw-Inviting her to a group date/event usually gets you nowhere. It’s a friend event.

 

[zekko]

The thing is, as Alvafe has mentioned above, I can't take her seriously & even though she is / isn't interested in me, because in the back of my mind it isn't sitting well that she has a bf and the way she's going forward with me, automatically makes me think that there isn't something serious I should take out "IF" it turns into a relationship.

I definitely think she is flirting with you, but that doesn't necessarily mean it is something "serious".
The girl could be an attention ho, as indicated by the fact that she has a boyfriend but apparently that isn't enough for her.
On the other hand, she could be looking to branch swing.

You might be able to get some action out of this, if that is your goal, but I wouldn't necessarily see it as something serious. There are some red flags here, or at the very least yellow ones.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I definitely think she is flirting with you, but that doesn't necessarily mean it is something "serious".
The girl could be an attention ho, as indicated by the fact that she has a boyfriend but apparently that isn't enough for her.
On the other hand, she could be looking to branch swing.

You might be able to get some action out of this, if that is your goal, but I wouldn't necessarily see it as something serious. There are some red flags here, or at the very least yellow ones.

Attention hoez get attention from anywhere. It doesn't matter if the guy is "good enough" or not. They have an addiction to getting all or most of the validation in the room or the group. Your nothing special, just a source of attention and entertainment.

 

[zekko]

Attention hoez get attention from anywhere. It doesn't matter if the guy is "good enough" or not. They have an addiction to getting all or most of the validation in the room or the group. Your nothing special, just a source of attention and entertainment.

True. Some girls are more clever about it than others. Like they won't flirt with other guys in front of you, so it leads you to think you're the only one. This way they build up a bunch of guys around them who think they are special in her eyes. If you watch carefully though, they'll give themselves away.