"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Casual Fling

NDGUY88

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New to site, thought I would give this a whirl. I currently work 70+ hours a week, and I am studying for the CFA. I don't have any time for actual dating, so the most I look for is a one night stand. However, I have real trouble actually "spitting game." The whole thing just seems kinda lame and indirect. I just cannot bring myself to fake interest in what a girl actually has to say, when all I want is just a one night stand. Any advice on how to mitigate this thinking or to flat out just get girls to approach you first? My standards for hooking up aren't high, so I am not too picky.

Side note, I really don't have any friends that are girls, so that whole thing of turning a friend into a "lover" is off the table.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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NDGUY88

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Can't lie to you guys, totally desperate. Uncertain what to do. I don't see why it has to be this difficult. I am on over a year long dry spell, and I don't what I can do to break it. It's so hard for me to spit game, bc I truly just want to get laid. I can't fake interest.

I think I am ok looking, and I have a pretty muscular build.
 

Mike32ct

Master Don Juan
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First, you need to accept that some women DO go for ONS'. My first ONS propositioned ME. It blows my mind to this day. Prior to that, it was really hard to believe that some women want quick hot sex with a stranger. But it's true. If she's alone (best) or with say one friend after say 1am, she's not there for milk and cookies lol. I'm not saying it's easy. It's generally quite challenging except for very good looking guys. But it can be done.

You don't have to be that interested in her as a person, but don't you genuinely like talking to a girl? Don't just go by looks and the boner test. Try to find a chick that seems cool and has half a brain. I mean, she's not your gf for the night, but it is more fun when it feels like it.

Never force yourself to converse with a chick you don't "click" with just to b@ng her. Odds are it won't work anyway.

Women looking to get F-ed generally aren't the most friendly. She might even seem a bit cold at first, but if you have a decent convo with some kino (or dancing at a club), you have a shot.

You have a muscular build - great. Make sure you have a sexy haircut (or shaved or buzz if balding). Hairstyle is critical for scoring.
 

NDGUY88

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Mike32ct said:
First, you need to accept that some women DO go for ONS'. My first ONS propositioned ME. It blows my mind to this day. Prior to that, it was really hard to believe that some women want quick hot sex with a stranger. But it's true. If she's alone (best) or with say one friend after say 1am, she's not there for milk and cookies lol. I'm not saying it's easy. It's generally quite challenging except for very good looking guys. But it can be done.

You don't have to be that interested in her as a person, but don't you genuinely like talking to a girl? Don't just go by looks and the boner test. Try to find a chick that seems cool and has half a brain. I mean, she's not your gf for the night, but it is more fun when it feels like it.

Never force yourself to converse with a chick you don't "click" with just to b@ng her. Odds are it won't work anyway.


Women looking to get F-ed generally aren't the most friendly. She might even seem a bit cold at first, but if you have a decent convo with some kino (or dancing at a club), you have a shot.

You have a muscular build - great. Make sure you have a sexy haircut (or shaved or buzz if balding). Hairstyle is critical for scoring.
TBH, I don't enjoy talking to women. And my standards for hooking up aren't high at all. I don't' know whether or not I have a sexy hair cut, my hair kind of grows in a shag. If I am being honest, I just can't make a move, it all seems so forced and disingenuous. It's difficult for me and as a result, I've only been with 4 women, two of which were strippers, and they were all one night stands. So do the math on that. I know it seems dumb, but I always hope the girl makes the first move. But that's about as rare as a 3 leaf clover.
 

Mike32ct

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Yeah a girl will only make the move if the guy is really hot or he has a status thing going like he's the bartender. Or he's really rich. Or he's decent looking but one of the few guys in her social circle.

I don't recommend waiting for a girl to come after you. At a minimum, you need to get the conversation started.

I'm sorry that you don't like talking to women. It's a common issue with guys. Some guys might think they are afraid to approach or don't know what to say, but they honestly just don't LIKE talking to girls, so it's a chore they would rather avoid. But it's very hard to play this game if you don't enjoy talking* to girls.

*I don't mean forcing yourself to "work the room"; I just mean start a convo and fluff talk with a female.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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