"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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casual coffee internet meeting problem

pete101

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i was suppose to meet this HB yesterday for a casual coffee meet up, i met her from the internet but she refused to give me her number citing that back in the day people were able to get by without the need to exchange numbers so she was sure we could manage too..

i accepted this but provided mine so that she could call me on the day when she got there with the caller id blocked. she did not see this message till a few days after i sent it.

we arranged this coffee meet up over a week ago and she doesn't come on facebook very often so i did not expect her to remember since it's been 7 days ago unless her interest level was really really high.

long story short she didn't turn up and didn't even make an effort to let me know in advance she wasn't coming.

i get a msg from her a few hours after we were suppose to meet that she couldnt' make it and something came up.. i proceeded to send a msg back giving her some grief about not even letting me know and that she should have confirmed it with me yesterday or made an effort to come on FB to do so.

obviously i can't give someone so much grief who i've never met before but i feel like if i let her get away with this i'll be a major AFC. she did counter offer with another time after she got back from holiday next week but it was more a casual 'let's do this after next week i'll let you know' type offers which don't really mean sh1t.

how should i respond to this sort of actions?
im trying my best not to give much grief but i dont know what to say to make it sound like that i will not accept this kind of behaviour.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Mavrick

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You know what was AFC? It was the fact that you gave her grief about not showing up. You should have told her that you forgot about it and didn't show up either, or you should have told her that you were there for about 15 minutes, and you left. Then you should have proceeded to tell her that it's all good, and you went out with another chick.

She should be making the move now. There shouldn't been any plans for a second date unless she's initiated it and wants to make it up to you.
 

SickAgain

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I had a similar incident occur to me. My case: she said she's down to kick it, when i call her to come kick it, she doesn't pick up phone or respond to e-mail.

My take: either they like to lead guys on or they're just nervous about meeting strangers online. I'm gonna give mine one more try after a week. In your case, I think she lost her chance, but it may be worth one more shot.
 

Mavrick

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He lost his chance by being reactive and not showing any value.
 

JackPrescott

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pete101 said:
i was suppose to meet this HB yesterday for a casual coffee meet up, i met her from the internet but she refused to give me her number citing that back in the day people were able to get by without the need to exchange numbers so she was sure we could manage too..

i accepted this but provided mine so that she could call me on the day when she got there with the caller id blocked. she did not see this message till a few days after i sent it.

we arranged this coffee meet up over a week ago and she doesn't come on facebook very often so i did not expect her to remember since it's been 7 days ago unless her interest level was really really high.

long story short she didn't turn up and didn't even make an effort to let me know in advance she wasn't coming.

i get a msg from her a few hours after we were suppose to meet that she couldnt' make it and something came up.. i proceeded to send a msg back giving her some grief about not even letting me know and that she should have confirmed it with me yesterday or made an effort to come on FB to do so.

obviously i can't give someone so much grief who i've never met before but i feel like if i let her get away with this i'll be a major AFC. she did counter offer with another time after she got back from holiday next week but it was more a casual 'let's do this after next week i'll let you know' type offers which don't really mean sh1t.

how should i respond to this sort of actions?
im trying my best not to give much grief but i dont know what to say to make it sound like that i will not accept this kind of behaviour.
Congrats, you got FLAKED. This woman has no sexual interest in you. She is playing internet site games.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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pete101

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JackPrescott said:
Congrats, you got FLAKED. This woman has no sexual interest in you. She is playing internet site games.
yeah that's what i thought. i guess with internet chicks there's a higher incidence of them flaking because well.. it's so easy for them to do it.

i thought about the saying i didnt show either but thought i should try to establish my boundaries clear that it's appropriate to let someone know you're not coming.
 

MacAvoy

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Pete, I've got a question for you.

If she's not that interested in you, why are you wasting your time chasing someone who doesn't like you? Do you really want a relationship with a women who doesn't like you enough to keep her plans with you, which will lead to her disrespecting you in the future because she doesn't like you that much?

Flaking is a direct result of LOW IL. Its because you didn't create attraction when you were interacting with her up to that point. So stop focussing on the flake and focus on what your doing wrong. Step up your game gentelmen.

In this case, your biggest mistake was making plans so far in the future with no follow up prior. Your insticts told you she was going to flake so you should have either followed up or not went.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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pete101 said:
...how should i respond to this sort of actions?
im trying my best not to give much grief but i dont know what to say to make it sound like that i will not accept this kind of behaviour.
Qualify, qualify, qualify. Women who are interested won't flake unless it is an emergency. You are in no place to demand the behavior of someone you barely know either. It's you're choice whether to accept it or move on just like it was her choice to show up or not. No need to get upset about it, you don't even know her.
 
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