"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Can't silence that voice in my head that says "THINK!"

arcilitei34

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 20, 2004
Messages
123
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
Calgary, Alberta
I honestly can't, i've been with this one girl for awhile now, and just recently this one guy that she really liked came crawling back,
and she tells me that she's super pissed at the guy and wont talk to him. Now.. I trust her, i really do, however I don't like to think that i'm insecure, maybe I am? who knows.
But in the back of my head it always says, she could be lying to youuu.. she could be cheating.. and it's really driving me insane! IS there something wrong with me?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Maeisgood

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2004
Messages
447
Reaction score
3
Can you somehow arrange for a "chance" encounter between the two of them in front of you to see how they react to each other? Or maybe you can talk to one of her friends and say something like "So that _____'s a real jerk, huh?" See how the friend reacts to that statement.
 

penkitten

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 14, 2001
Messages
8,256
Reaction score
236
Age
49
Location
at our house
this voice is called insecurity. tell him to stf up. it is normal to have this voice, we all do.
 

arcilitei34

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 20, 2004
Messages
123
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
Calgary, Alberta
nope not yet, the guy is like.. 4 years older than her too. I guess all I can really base my trust off of is her own words, but at the same time I feel like it's not reassuring enough.
 

penkitten

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 14, 2001
Messages
8,256
Reaction score
236
Age
49
Location
at our house
Originally posted by arcilitei34
nope not yet, the guy is like.. 4 years older than her too. I guess all I can really base my trust off of is her own words, but at the same time I feel like it's not reassuring enough.
base your trust off actions first , words second.
actions speak louder than words.
words can be empty promises.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

arcilitei34

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 20, 2004
Messages
123
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
Calgary, Alberta
Originally posted by penkitten
base your trust off actions first , words second.
actions speak louder than words.
words can be empty promises.
I can't exactly quite base my thoughts on her actions, we don't really see each other everyday, and sometimes when i try to do that her actions seem viable. looks like I should tell the other part of me to stfu.
 
Top