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Cant get her out of my mind

The Duke

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Hey guys, Im a 30 year old male and was dating this 23 year old girl a year ago. We only dated for 4 months. I really liked this girl and in the beginning she liked me more. This went bad after 3 months. I saw alot of red flags and knew how to handle on them, but i didnt. I thought to myself this time im gonna do it different and be the caring guy and neglect her bad habits and red flags. It anoyyed me and it showed off i supose. Normally i would confront a woman and tell her i dont accept this unrespectable behaviour. Her behaviour went worse ( Excuses for sex, not texting or calling, nagging). I went on to support her in everyway i could.

I blame myself to lose my frame for this girl. But she gave me a feeling i didnt felt for like 8 years. She still comes up often in my mind and cant get rid of the thought of her. I work much, i workout 6 times a week, i have alot of hobbies and friends. I date and bang alot of women. But still after a year she still comes up in my mind. I know it sounds beta but it makes me sad. Maybe i got onitis i dont know. But other women doesnt seem to top her off. I get flashes in my mind the time we were togheter and it gets me everytime.

I just needed to write this down. Sorry for my bad English. Some of you guys experience the same? And what did you do to make it better? I tried to forget but that doesnt work. I dont follow her on anything or see her in real life.

P.S. When i read this back i think to myself grow a pair, but still it feels something is missing in my life.
Learn from your past experiences with women. That's how you grow and understand yourself better which leads you to make better choices in regards to women. We've all had that one that seemed to have it all yet are not good long term choices. Once the years go by you will come to understand it was more infatuation than reality. There will always be women that stand out in your mind for whatever reason. Just enjoy the memories and the time you spent with them. But seek the one who scores high in all the categories that matter..... Settle down with her, they are rare.
 

Giovanni SouthSide

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Every man who is good with women becomes so only after having his heart WRECKED by a woman.

Write yourself a list of Dealbreaker Red flags and check off all the ones she had.
Then write a list of Must have's and see all the empty spots of what she lacked.

Then create yourself standards for future women and slate them according to whether their behavior is ONS/ Pump & Dump -or- Plate - or- Relationship Material. FWIW a woman who sleeps with you on the first date can still be relationship material....

this is raw wisdom of the alpha gods right here.
 

soulforge

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Thats because this BS advice doesnt work. Anytime you find yourself negotiating with women and their doings you kill attraction. Death by 1000 cuts.
Don't do this.
The stigma around the sphere is draw boundary lines through speech. Not so.
Do it through action.
When dating younger women you must not be needy. At all.
Plan on just getting a turn and dont think of her as a ltr.
If she digs your vibe and secs she will stick around. If not who gives a fck. Move on.
You cannot tell her or negotiate out of her good behaviour. Hold a strong frame, if she over steps the line, or disrespects you, removal of attention, walking away is all you can do.

I just walked away from a hot 22 year old Eastern European chick.. The is unfortunately the reality of modern dating.
 

Giovanni SouthSide

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You cannot tell her or negotiate out of her good behaviour. Hold a strong frame, if she over steps the line, or disrespects you, removal of attention, walking away is all you can do.

I just walked away from a hot 22 year old Eastern European chick.. The is unfortunately the reality of modern dating.



it takes a sack of steel to walk away from a little number who was fvcking your brains out, indeed. It was only 2 months of seeing this girl. She came for a week straight every night to my pad and I was pounding her all over the place. She let me do anal. She cooked me breakfast and washed the dishes. That is how submissive I had her in my realm.

I had to dispatch her with her walking papers 3 weeks ago for disrespect over the phone. She never insulted me but her sudden lack of interest is what made me blow a gasket.
Your gut just tells you when her interest level is droppin and you gotta walk away.
just texted her in these exact words "fvck off and delete my number". Immediately she started texting me back but I ignored her. Kept solid to my word.
Haven't heard from her ever since.
They dont bother rectifying let alone recognizing their unacceptable bad behavior because they have other options, brother.

For a split second I thought I can cool the demons in me and lay low with this girl for a bit since the chemistry was pacing with her but sh*t they always start with that disrespectful behavior down the road and im a prideful son of a gun that I had to cut my losses and walk away.
She hasnt even bothered to reach out for 3 weeks which means she doesn't and never cared regardless if I gave her the boot. Maybe I acted like a savage by telling her to fvck off but a girl who is really into you will be fearful of losing you.
But these hves be carrying a dead soul, homie
 
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AureliusMaximus

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Hey guys, Im a 30 year old male and was dating this 23 year old girl a year ago. We only dated for 4 months. I really liked this girl and in the beginning she liked me more. This went bad after 3 months. I saw alot of red flags and knew how to handle on them, but i didnt. I thought to myself this time im gonna do it different and be the caring guy and neglect her bad habits and red flags. It anoyyed me and it showed off i supose. Normally i would confront a woman and tell her i dont accept this unrespectable behaviour. Her behaviour went worse ( Excuses for sex, not texting or calling, nagging). I went on to support her in everyway i could.

I blame myself to lose my frame for this girl. But she gave me a feeling i didnt felt for like 8 years. She still comes up often in my mind and cant get rid of the thought of her. I work much, i workout 6 times a week, i have alot of hobbies and friends. I date and bang alot of women. But still after a year she still comes up in my mind. I know it sounds beta but it makes me sad. Maybe i got onitis i dont know. But other women doesnt seem to top her off. I get flashes in my mind the time we were togheter and it gets me everytime.

I just needed to write this down. Sorry for my bad English. Some of you guys experience the same? And what did you do to make it better? I tried to forget but that doesnt work. I dont follow her on anything or see her in real life.

P.S. When i read this back i think to myself grow a pair, but still it feels something is missing in my life.
There is 7 billion people in this world, half of them are female.
If you think "she's the one" that slipped away then you're delusional. There is many "one's" out there that can make you feel the same way.

Keep smashing through the dating pool and you will find them...
Stay positive bruh! :devil::up:
 

soulforge

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it takes a sack of steel to walk away from a little number who was fvcking your brains out, indeed. It was only 2 months of seeing this girl. She came for a week straight every night to my pad and I was pounding her all over the place. She let me do anal. She cooked me breakfast and washed the dishes. That is how submissive I had her in my realm.

I had to dispatch her with her walking papers 3 weeks ago for disrespect over the phone. She never insulted me but her sudden lack of interest is what made me blow a gasket.
Your gut just tells you when her interest level is droppin and you gotta walk away.
just texted her in these exact words "fvck off and delete my number". Immediately she started texting me back but I ignored her. Kept solid to my word.
Haven't heard from her ever since.
They dont bother rectifying let alone recognizing their unacceptable bad behavior because they have other options, brother.

For a split second I thought I can cool the demons in me and lay low with this girl for a bit since the chemistry was pacing with her but sh*t they always start with that disrespectful behavior down the road and im a prideful son of a gun that I had to cut my losses and walk away.
She hasnt even bothered to reach out for 3 weeks which means she doesn't and never cared regardless if I gave her the boot. Maybe I acted like a savage by telling her to fvck off but a girl who is really into you will be fearful of losing you.
But these hves be carrying a dead soul, homie
Nail on the head... They have other options.. Exactly why I never expect anything long term from most Western Woman.

Smash a few times then move on. I am sure there was some red flags about her behaviour when you met her? Did you intentionally ignore those flags
 

soulforge

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There is 7 billion people in this world, half of them are female.
If you think "she's the one" that slipped away then you're delusional. There is many "one's" out there that can make you feel the same way.

Keep smashing through the dating pool and you will find them...
Stay positive bruh! :devil::up:
I simply plough through woman these days.. There is no ONE, just when you thought the hottest one slipped away... 8 months down the line another one with different qualities or bedroom skill set comes along.

I'm actually more careful about which one I sleep with or continue seeing if there is a red flag.. any level of disrespect and I'm quick to eject.

In the posters case, there was likely flags all along, which he ignored/blind sided because of the good zex
 

Giovanni SouthSide

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Nail on the head... They have other options.. Exactly why I never expect anything long term from most Western Woman.

Smash a few times then move on. I am sure there was some red flags about her behaviour when you met her? Did you intentionally ignore those flags
Red flags to discard for potential LTR , definitely. But I gave her slight benefit of the doubt for the mean time since she was cool and actually brought me medicine and chicken soup when I was having a bad cough. This was days after I took her out the first time.
She didnt let me hit it on the first date.
The Red flags though.
She mentioned she had more guy friends than girl friends. A no no for me right there.
She mentioned she had a guy who was a friend with benefits before me. Stupid hve
She had several tats. A big one on her thigh almost reaching her pubic bone. I dont like tats on women period.
Did I mention that she had alot of guy friends. She no good.

One of the nights she was kicking it in my pad , we were in my living room in the sofa watching some youtube music videos drinking and chillin. She kept going on her phone. After several times of this bullsh*t, I snapped and snatched her phone right from her hands and threw it across the living room. Her jaw dropped. And she asked why ? I said to her with a little smirk on " If you wanted to be on your phone then you should have stayed at your house". I just poured her more wine on her glass and changed the subject. Spiking the f outta her emotions. I guarantee no other man had ever done that to her.
15 minutes later I was fvcking the sh*t out of her on the couch. We didnt make it upstairs to my room.
Going back to your question,
I never ignored the red flags my boy.
Us comrades in this cause never do. I guess I was just going with the current of the flow , infatuated with the booty and maybe thought I can turn a hve into a loyal girlfriend.
What do you think ?
 

soulforge

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Red flags to discard for potential LTR , definitely. But I gave her slight benefit of the doubt for the mean time since she was cool and actually brought me medicine and chicken soup when I was having a bad cough. This was days after I took her out the first time.
She didnt let me hit it on the first date.
The Red flags though.
She mentioned she had more guy friends than girl friends. A no no for me right there.
She mentioned she had a guy who was a friend with benefits before me. Stupid hve
She had several tats. A big one on her thigh almost reaching her pubic bone. I dont like tats on women period.
Did I mention that she had alot of guy friends. She no good.

One of the nights she was kicking it in my pad , we were in my living room in the sofa watching some youtube music videos drinking and chillin. She kept going on her phone. After several times of this bullsh*t, I snapped and snatched her phone right from her hands and threw it across the living room. Her jaw dropped. And she asked why ? I said to her with a little smirk on " If you wanted to be on your phone then you should have stayed at your house". I just poured her more wine on her glass and changed the subject. Spiking the f outta her emotions. I guarantee no other man had ever done that to her.
15 minutes later I was fvcking the sh*t out of her on the couch. We didnt make it upstairs to my room.
Going back to your question,
I never ignored the red flags my boy.
Us comrades in this cause never do. I guess I was just going with the current of the flow , infatuated with the booty and maybe thought I can turn a hve into a loyal girlfriend.
What do you think ?
The fact that she has mostly Male freinds, who ALL want to bang her, an ex Fuk buddy who similar to you, pounded her azz like crazy prob not so long ago, tells me she might have monkey branched to another dude, therefore the attitude and disrespect.

That being said, girls like these are meant to be temporary.. You got a little too comfortable, and got her being the wifey around you.. Cooking, cleaning etc...

I simply bang them, and by lunchtime following day tell them, I have things to do, you need to go home.

Don't get too comfortable.
 

Giovanni SouthSide

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The fact that she has mostly Male freinds, who ALL want to bang her, an ex Fuk buddy who similar to you, pounded her azz like crazy prob not so long ago, tells me she might have monkey branched to another dude, therefore the attitude and disrespect.

That being said, girls like these are meant to be temporary.. You got a little too comfortable, and got her being the wifey around you.. Cooking, cleaning etc...

I simply bang them, and by lunchtime following day tell them, I have things to do, you need to go home.

Don't get too comfortable.
Money to the bank. Probably an ex or another fool came in the picture in those days reason for her cold switch. She probably already got smashed in these 3 weeks of no contact.

That is why I just signed up on here to keep sharpening the blade. Even the genuis asks questions like pac said. Been knowing this sh*t since 2009 when Kanye dropped that "heartless" cut.

If I ever reach out to her for a last fvck and to discard her for good right after , will I look weak in her eyes and not a man of my word?
she lives like 20 minutes away from me. I already know the answer from the vets around here but what would you do homie? would you just leave it at " fvck off and delete my number"
 

soulforge

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Money to the bank. Probably an ex or another fool came in the picture in those days reason for her cold switch. She probably already got smashed in these 3 weeks of no contact.

That is why I just signed up on here to keep sharpening the blade. Even the genuis asks questions like pac said. Been knowing this sh*t since 2009 when Kanye dropped that "heartless" cut.

If I ever reach out to her for a last fvck and to discard her for good right after , will I look weak in her eyes and not a man of my word?
she lives like 20 minutes away from me. I already know the answer from the vets around here but what would you do homie? would you just leave it at " fvck off and delete my number"
Yes you will look very week... Remember sex is a two way thing, she gains pleasure from it too, and she gets your time and attention...

That's a REWARD.. Men with abundance or abundance mindset simply move onto the next... Like this if she reaches out to you in the future, you will have the leverage!

Your essentially rewarding her, for dropping you for another man.
 
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