"Blank Mind on Dates? She's Dropping Hints You Keep Missing"

The plates get cleared and the silence lands like a brick. You can feel her waiting. Your brain offers up your commute, your job, the weather — topics that have ended more second dates than bad breath.

Here's what most guys never learn: women hand out free conversational material all night long. Tiny clues about what they actually want to discuss. Catch them and you never run out of things to say — because she's telling you what to say next.

Rule 4 of the "22 Rules" trains your ear to catch every single one.

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Can you tell me how it is being raised by a single mom?

AgentofChaos

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I've never experienced being raised by a single mom. Can you tell me how it is and how it affected you growing up as a man?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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rayv12

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I was mostly raised by my mother. My father stays abroad 11months out of 12 and now it is for almost 30years. one thing that I struggled initially a lot and hated Is being fearful of doing normal things and always felt like being taken advantage off. Something I’ve observed in her. Though I no longer feel that anymore but I’m always very cautious about my actions.
 

derby1

Master Don Juan
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the boy ends up extremely emasculated or extremely insecure, they cant handle anything a woman does, or any advice from a male that the way they are doing things is slightly wrong
 

Black Widow Void

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Due to court custody battles and the woman normally getting awarded, such was the case with me.

I was brought up more on sensitivity and empathy. Also to be a 'gentleman.' In small doses, I think this is okay. However, when it's in excess, this is unhealthy for a boy / young man.
The worst part?
My mother didn't do a lot of revolving door dating but the men I did meet (and also her future husband) were "pleasers." These were poor role models.
I'm really surprised that I averaged a new girlfriend each school year. I think I was above average looking which probably played a role. I wasn't overly masculine - that's for sure.

After getting tired of making excuses for female behavior and observing male friends that were achieving the end result faster and with less headaches, I spent my past time doing a whole lot of self-reflecting. Through those late teen years, I 'unwove' that motherly influential tapestry. To this day, I don't get any kick out of making a woman (or anyone) feel bad, but during my transformation period, I started looking after myself. I didn't want to feel bad either.
 

Hal9000

Master Don Juan
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Head down to the closest prison and ask those guys. They were all raised without a father.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Billtx49

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It doesn’t matter, anyone can blame their fvcked up adult state of mind on their childhood circumstances, my brother does for minor reasons. Adolescent years with in house beta dad or no dad present at all has no impact on what you want to become in life.
Many childhood abuse victims can and do overcome their ingrained tendency to abuse their own children when they become parents simply based on their own mindset and personal determination Not to repeat their past…
 

redskinsfan92

Master Don Juan
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My parents are still married. My dad never has done household chores such as washing dishes, laundry, cooking, etc. Holds frame for sure. Wish I would have learned more from his actions sooner.
 
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