"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Can someone translate this for me?

P

PS79

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Girl does everything to get your attention. Eye contact, close proximity, etc. and you start to notice it but now she's doing things to avoid you.

Explain this to me.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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K

Kevin Feng

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Ok, I'm going to save you a LOT of time.

Mystery and Matador talk a lot about IOI's, stuff of that nature in their book, but in reality, you just NEED TO APPROACH.

You're overanalyzing it, fact is this, different women have different behavior. Some girls are more overt than others, etc etc.

That really isn't a reason not to approach. Approach a girl because you find her attractive, you don't a reason other than that. Excercise the alpha male inside you and take authority.

If you watch Mystery and Matador game, they never look for IOI's, they just go for the kill.

-Kevin
 
P

PS79

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Yep, that's why they're both single and miserable
 
I

Igetit!

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PS79 said:
Girl does everything to get your attention. Eye contact, close proximity, etc. and you start to notice it but now she's doing things to avoid you.

Explain this to me.
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There doesn't really seem too much here to go on. You need to put this into a better context for us to get a better view of what's really going on.

You say this girl has been doing everything she can to get your attention. Ok,how long has she been doing this? Also,is all the communication between you two these little signs,hints,and signals,or have you two actually spoken to each other? And if so,what was the conversation like?

Another thing:when did she start doing things to avoid you? Had she been trying and trying to get your attention,then you finally responded in some way,THEN she started to avoid you? If that's the case,then how was it that you responded to her?

I know this may seem to be a lot of questions to answer,but it's necessary to get an accurate picture of what's going on with this girl.
 
C

Captain

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PS79 said:
Yep, that's why they're both single and miserable
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Single, yes, but miserable? No, no, no!

Single doesn't mean miserable. That's an AFC mindset, that you have to have a steady girlfriend to be happy. I prefer to be single, and date multiple women. I'm happy, far happier than all the men out there in exclusive relationships who aren't getting what they want.

Kevin is 100% right when he says to approach regardless of indicators of interest.

My guess is that you procrastinated too much, and the window of opportunity has closed, as she has lost interest. Either way, approach her.

We really need to know what kind of situation you were in when this happened, where you were and if you know each other, how old, etc.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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A

Allurre

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If she postpones her behavior, it's definitely a sign of her 'giving up' or letting go of you. Obviously, you didn't follow up with her cues or ask her out.
 
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