Dayspring
Don Juan
LONG post ahead! Sorry! Read first and last two paragraphs to get jist of it, read rest to see why I'm having problems just dumping her ass and how she hurt me.
Here's the situation: I've fallen for a friend. This is typical of me when I'm not looking for a relationship or whatever; I ignore the physical aspect, connect on an intellectual level and THEN fall head over heals if she's good looking and there's a spark.
When I started university last year, I met someone who was VERY similar to me: we're both writers, both interested in the same things, etc, etc, sob-story. She asked me out for coffee and junk a few times and we got to really find out just how similar we are, but she talked about her ex back then so I never made a move, thinking she was still seeing him. When I found out she was talking about an EX-boyfriend, I didn't realise she's got issues (this is well-before I became a Don Juannabe), I just noticed she was single and decided to ask her out and only later realized how stupidly "practical" I made my delivered proposal sound. She naturally gave me the "you're like a big brother!" speech. Oh well.
Like I said, I fell for a FRIEND, so I didn't just end our relationship then and there because she turned me down. We became closer unintentionally, but more as best friends. Every week, after a night course, we'd go out with two other friends for dinner and chat. I assumed this tradition was going to remain the same after the summer break since we again all had a night course once a week, but was pleasantly surprised to find out she only asked me out. We went to a nicer restaurant then normal and walked there, instead of take the metro/subway as was last year's custom, in order to make the evening last longer.
Over the previous year, while best friends after I had asked her out, we had talked about what we looked for in relationships and partners, etc, while trading sob stories and dissing EXs; typical relationship talks between best friends. Anyway, this particular evening she was always leaning far over the table and reaching over to hold my hand. We had one of our typical relationship talks, except her answers, which she aware I already knew everything about, had DRASTICALLY changed:
She was now looking for everything I look for in a relationship WORD-FOR-WORD. Her perfect guy was verbatim description of me. I thought she was testing me to see if I was still interested after all this time, which I was, so I started to flirt back. She REALLY liked this.
Then randomly, at the end of the conversation before I was going to make a move (make plans for a date, or whatever), she starts talking about how she can get this **** buddy of hers to make the next step. "He's sooo this! He's soooo that! What if I scare him away? How do I tell him I want all this?" I giver her the adivce, because I didn't know to react with showing I felt completey hurt, and the evening ends there.
I hoped she was playing hard to get, but the next week after class he was waiting for her to take back to his place. They did it, she tried to change from **** buddies and broke up. She hates him and we're having typical Slam-the-EX conversation and itgoes the route of "Why can't I ever meet a guy like you? All I want is someone who does X like you do, who is Y like you are, who's as good looking you are... How hard can it be to find YOU?!"
WHOA. So I figure here's my chance. She says she wants to be platonic, and has cancelled EVERY meeting we were to have ever this year since. We had a few e-mails and chance meetings, but that's it. I move on, and so has she. We're both Narnia fans, so when she tells me she's been seeing movies with a new guy (ie: they're not serious yet), I joke that I reserve the film-adaptation of Narnia, and she not only accepts, but all but demands that we make a day of it: go out to lunch, see Narnia, another movie, go out to dinner. Since I live so damned far from the school, she also wants me to stay the night at her apartment.
Guess what? Surprise, surprise, she cancelled. She e-mails me insisting that she is NOT blowing me off (did I tell her she was?), and that she'll call me early the following week to reschedule the day. That phone call should have been Monday/Tuesday at the latest, and she has yet to even e-mail me.
I know she's treating me like ****, so I replied to her "I SWEAR I'm NOT blowing you off!" e-mail with a link to a trailer of a movie we're dieing to see this summer, in order to make it appear like I was unphased by her cruelty.
HELP ME GET OVER HER!!! This is not a normal woman! Other things to note is that she's only attracted to father-figures and guys we all know (even her)will treat her like crap. Since I'm youngr and treat her like a human being, I see now that she's fallen for me on an intellectual and emotional level ONLY, which is probably why she had **** buddies when she was "only going out as friends" with me for well over a year. Best friends aside, we still went ALONE for coffee, ALONE to restaurants, ALONE to book readings...
SAVE ME! I KNOW she's just going to keep messing with me and that I'll never have a chance since she's the one with the issues, but I can't get over her (something that's made me miss out on chances with two 9s already since I was unknowingly comparing them to her). Now she's not even treating me like a best friend; she's more of a fair weather friend, only coming to me when she needs me to fulfill her emotional needs. How the fvck do I get over her?!
Here's the situation: I've fallen for a friend. This is typical of me when I'm not looking for a relationship or whatever; I ignore the physical aspect, connect on an intellectual level and THEN fall head over heals if she's good looking and there's a spark.
When I started university last year, I met someone who was VERY similar to me: we're both writers, both interested in the same things, etc, etc, sob-story. She asked me out for coffee and junk a few times and we got to really find out just how similar we are, but she talked about her ex back then so I never made a move, thinking she was still seeing him. When I found out she was talking about an EX-boyfriend, I didn't realise she's got issues (this is well-before I became a Don Juannabe), I just noticed she was single and decided to ask her out and only later realized how stupidly "practical" I made my delivered proposal sound. She naturally gave me the "you're like a big brother!" speech. Oh well.
Like I said, I fell for a FRIEND, so I didn't just end our relationship then and there because she turned me down. We became closer unintentionally, but more as best friends. Every week, after a night course, we'd go out with two other friends for dinner and chat. I assumed this tradition was going to remain the same after the summer break since we again all had a night course once a week, but was pleasantly surprised to find out she only asked me out. We went to a nicer restaurant then normal and walked there, instead of take the metro/subway as was last year's custom, in order to make the evening last longer.
Over the previous year, while best friends after I had asked her out, we had talked about what we looked for in relationships and partners, etc, while trading sob stories and dissing EXs; typical relationship talks between best friends. Anyway, this particular evening she was always leaning far over the table and reaching over to hold my hand. We had one of our typical relationship talks, except her answers, which she aware I already knew everything about, had DRASTICALLY changed:
She was now looking for everything I look for in a relationship WORD-FOR-WORD. Her perfect guy was verbatim description of me. I thought she was testing me to see if I was still interested after all this time, which I was, so I started to flirt back. She REALLY liked this.
Then randomly, at the end of the conversation before I was going to make a move (make plans for a date, or whatever), she starts talking about how she can get this **** buddy of hers to make the next step. "He's sooo this! He's soooo that! What if I scare him away? How do I tell him I want all this?" I giver her the adivce, because I didn't know to react with showing I felt completey hurt, and the evening ends there.
I hoped she was playing hard to get, but the next week after class he was waiting for her to take back to his place. They did it, she tried to change from **** buddies and broke up. She hates him and we're having typical Slam-the-EX conversation and itgoes the route of "Why can't I ever meet a guy like you? All I want is someone who does X like you do, who is Y like you are, who's as good looking you are... How hard can it be to find YOU?!"
WHOA. So I figure here's my chance. She says she wants to be platonic, and has cancelled EVERY meeting we were to have ever this year since. We had a few e-mails and chance meetings, but that's it. I move on, and so has she. We're both Narnia fans, so when she tells me she's been seeing movies with a new guy (ie: they're not serious yet), I joke that I reserve the film-adaptation of Narnia, and she not only accepts, but all but demands that we make a day of it: go out to lunch, see Narnia, another movie, go out to dinner. Since I live so damned far from the school, she also wants me to stay the night at her apartment.
Guess what? Surprise, surprise, she cancelled. She e-mails me insisting that she is NOT blowing me off (did I tell her she was?), and that she'll call me early the following week to reschedule the day. That phone call should have been Monday/Tuesday at the latest, and she has yet to even e-mail me.
I know she's treating me like ****, so I replied to her "I SWEAR I'm NOT blowing you off!" e-mail with a link to a trailer of a movie we're dieing to see this summer, in order to make it appear like I was unphased by her cruelty.
HELP ME GET OVER HER!!! This is not a normal woman! Other things to note is that she's only attracted to father-figures and guys we all know (even her)will treat her like crap. Since I'm youngr and treat her like a human being, I see now that she's fallen for me on an intellectual and emotional level ONLY, which is probably why she had **** buddies when she was "only going out as friends" with me for well over a year. Best friends aside, we still went ALONE for coffee, ALONE to restaurants, ALONE to book readings...
SAVE ME! I KNOW she's just going to keep messing with me and that I'll never have a chance since she's the one with the issues, but I can't get over her (something that's made me miss out on chances with two 9s already since I was unknowingly comparing them to her). Now she's not even treating me like a best friend; she's more of a fair weather friend, only coming to me when she needs me to fulfill her emotional needs. How the fvck do I get over her?!
