"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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calibrating ****y funny / signs you've gone too far

ne0phyte

Don Juan
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just wondering how do you know if you've gone too far doing ****y funny?

lately, i've been testing my boundaries with it, and there are times when I feel like I've gone too far.

for instance, there's this one girl who likes to tell embarrassing stories about herself. it's really easy to neg her, and she seems to like it (always laughing). for example, she says she didn't stop believing in santa until she was 16 (she's 24 now). so i said, "wow, do you know the truth about the tooth fairy then?"

i guess my question is, if they're still laughing (genuinely from what I gauge), does that mean I'm still within the boundaries? and what are some reactions to when you guys have overdone the ****y funny?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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JustLurk

Senior Don Juan
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Jul 1, 2010
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Personally, as long as I concentrate on the "fun" part and not the "jerk" part, it never goes too much into the "jerk" part. Some people can give as good as they get and take crazy negs, some people just can't take it, and some people will give you trouble for negging others.
 

runner83

Master Don Juan
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JustLurk said:
Personally, as long as I concentrate on the "fun" part and not the "jerk" part, it never goes too much into the "jerk" part. Some people can give as good as they get and take crazy negs, some people just can't take it, and some people will give you trouble for negging others.
Push the boundaries and see what happens.

But don't overdo the ****y and funny. i.e. mix it up with normal conversation as well.

Main thing is not to come off as arrogant, since that will be a reflection of your own insecurities. But as long as you mix enough humour into it, arrogance should not be an issue.

At the other end of the scale, also make sure you don't turn into the "entertaining monkey".

Remember that a jerk is simply a guy who puts his own needs equal to or above those of others.

Better to be a jerk and get laid than an "entertaining monkey" who people laugh at, not with.
 
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