"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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C&F Repository

E

Engee

Don Juan
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Lets post some decent C&F routines bros..

I'll start- I used this one on a HB8 - "you know what the people looking at us now must be thinking?.. pause.. whats a hot, smart and sexy person like that ..pause..doing with a looser like HER' (looking at her and pointing) worked great..
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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C

Capi Crimini

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^ the above would actually be a neg hit.

Here's one I heard in a indie movei(Ghost City(or sumtin) anyway. it's more of a comeback.

Other Guy : **** YOU!
You: I bet you'd love to.... but you gotta buy me dinner first.

anyway... I think it's best to think these things up on the fly. Otherwise you'll sound canned or re-use that same line.

Laughter is caused by a thought that does not make logical sense and your brain can't process it. So by seeing things in a different light you cause.... yes purple elephant....

If you didn't smile you have a different sense of humor maybe a...


What's purple and black and taps on glass......????


A baby in a microwave...

You sick motehr****er.....

one time this kid was throwing a brick up in the sky. He trew it over his head and caught it. His Grandpa came out and said 'can't you throw it any higher' SO he threw it as high as he could. They waited and it never came down

Whats the differnce between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies....

I don't have a ferrari in my garrage.

Then there is sarcasm and the dry humor. Thats more my type of stuff...

if you're always dissing the girl in your C&F it's not gonna be funny to her for long. A neg hit or whatever now and then is fine.

Learn to broden your funny skill. Learn to manipulate words... Learn to pick up different slurs of words. For example **** can be truck... I posted something on that a while back...

Key Number one. Like the weird Chinese guy said in The Last Samarui


'You mind too much'


Don't worry about it. GO out there not caring if your funny or the lame guy. Have fun. Loosen up. Say what you think. Be spontateous.

So there was this guy on the plane complaning of a monster on the wing... So he calls the steward and she looks out the window... and she pulls back amazed. The guy says 'see! a monster i'm not crazy' She says Nope. Your still crazy, But I just saw a birck go by..

No one beats me in spontanousiticalisity.I reign king of it. Thats why I ****ed the Queen of England.... BECAUSE I AM LORD (Insert random Screenname here.)

I'm really bored.

Whats the difference between a pile of bowling balls and a pile of dead babies.... I can't move a pile of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

A baby was covered by dead babies.... so it ate it's way out. Then It went back and ate some more.... Out of no where.... a brick fell on it and killed it.... _END_
 
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N

NaturallySelected

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Yeah first one defintely a neg-hit and I wouldn't recommend anyone tried it unless they coud pull it off.

If John says/does something stupid:

You say: "My names John, what's you're handicap." :D
 
N

Nameless

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I think the fact that the first implies that she is a loser (even if it is a joke) makes it a neg hit.

Replace loser with a less harsh word.

e.g.

"you know what the people looking at us now must be thinking?.. pause.. whats a hot, smart and sexy person like that ..pause..doing with a [silly girl /dork] like HER' (looking at her and pointing).

Now it is more C&F than neg hit.
 
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