"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Buying Women Drinks: Does It Get You Laid?

meldiamond

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Never say never, but as a general rule, I don't buy drinks solely for girls in the hopes of getting laid. I will buy drinks for friends or people I think are cool and I vibe with. Obviously, on special occasions: birthday, anniversary, promotion, I'm buying. But as a crass/lame "please have sex with me" or "please let me talk to you because I lack confidence" I don't.

However, I realize this is absolutely the norm. Does this help you get laid or to first base? It seems like a decent investment if you can regularly get a girl to make out with you or even have sex for the cost of a few drinks.

I just don't do it. I mean, yes, I don't mind buying rounds with friends, but as part of a cold approach, very rarely. I suspect that a lot of approaches or initial part of the interaction is awkward since just about every girl expects a drink during a cold approach. And since I generally am not looking to buy girls drinks as part of cold approach, it becomes this awkward waiting game where she expects me to fall into guy who buys drinks category.

Does it work? Simple question lol
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Mike32ct

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It don’t believe it’s too effective. It’s ok to buy her drinks after you are already hitting it off and have been talking or dancing for a while.

But initially offering some cold approach chick a drink (right off the bat)? I’ve never had that work*. Strangely, I think it can hurt the conversation early on and have it end sooner.

*Of course everything is looks-adjusted. Mileage will vary, depending on if the guy is Chad, Brad or Shrek lol.
 
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In2theGame

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Buying a drink won't get you laid but the offer to buy a drink should be an opener to have the girl follow you to the bar so you can start flirting with her leading to an eventual fvck. For example, if she's in a group, you can introduce yourself and say something like "Let's get a drink" and lead her away from the rest of the group and chat her up at the bar alone without worry of others trying to c0ckblock you.
 

Alvafe

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i'm not paying anyone anything. time is money right? so pray tell me why I should spend my time to maybe make she talk, and that don't even mean she will mind you, plus in a strategic way is not to your advantage, you are showing you are weaker then your target
 

old_skoolr

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Eh to me, buying a girl a drink was an excuse to get her away from her friends and alone.

I'd only do it if I thought she was worth it.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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sosousage

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dumb question, if you are in her type, then yes, u may get laid, but not cuz uu bought her a drink. lol.
imo its waste of money. the best are stories where someone buys a girl a drink, then some chad talks to her, dances with her and fuks her later LOL!
 

Tilex

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Hell no!
That's incredibly old fashion.

But if I'm on a date, I wouldn't mind sharing a bottle of sake.
And if I'm feeling really bold, I'll just invite her to a bubble bath with a nice cold bottle of Champagne.
 

Billtx49

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It’s ok to buy her drinks after you are already hitting it off and have been talking or dancing for a while.

But initially offering some cold approach chick a drink (right off the bat)? I’ve never had that work.
Agree completely. What’s a few bucks to you once you establish some connective communication with her?
Drink buying openers only bring out any get some free stuff gold digger incentives hidden inside her with no benefit to you…
 
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Murk

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"Can I buy you a drink?" is something I've never opened with, it's what you see in movies, it's what lame cvnts do, but have said after some discourse.

I buy drinks because I like to drink.

Girls have said "can you/are you going to buy me a drink?" - this gets my back up and I refuse and gets a "you buy me a drink".

I have no problem buying a girl a drink, I have a problem with women expecting or demanding it. I find the girls happy to buy you a drink first are the best, it means you established enough rapport and displayed enough value she wants to please you.

Not a golden rule just something that is the general case for me.

I still think meldiamond needs to be banned for having alt accounts.
 

MatureDJ

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As an initial opening, no, it simply lightens your wallet. That said, if you are in the middle of a good ongoing 1-on-1 conversation, it's bit like you're on your first date.

Now, IF you are at the top of the financial dominance hierarchy, than buying a drink would be painless in any case, and of course, any showing of such dominance is a good thing.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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meldiamond

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"Can I buy you a drink?" is something I've never opened with, it's what you see in movies, it's what lame cvnts do, but have said after some discourse.

I buy drinks because I like to drink.

Girls have said "can you/are you going to buy me a drink?" - this gets my back up and I refuse and gets a "you buy me a drink".

I have no problem buying a girl a drink, I have a problem with women expecting or demanding it. I find the girls happy to buy you a drink first are the best, it means you established enough rapport and displayed enough value she wants to please you.

Not a golden rule just something that is the general case for me.

I still think meldiamond needs to be banned for having alt accounts.
But you do crack together with your female roommate in hopes of having sex with her. But buying a woman a drink is wrong? lol. Quite the double standard.
 

meldiamond

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Hell no!
That's incredibly old fashion.

But if I'm on a date, I wouldn't mind sharing a bottle of sake.
And if I'm feeling really bold, I'll just invite her to a bubble bath with a nice cold bottle of Champagne.
It's not old fashioned I see guys doing it all the time now. And these are 20 something guys not just older men.
 

devilkingx2

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Think of it like this: what kind of girl would fvck you for $10? That's like Half an hour of pay.

It would work if you bought her like 5 drinks, because her impaired judgement would make you more attractive
 

BeExcellent

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It doesn't work in and of itself. If a woman likes you it won't matter that you didn't buy her a drink. Drinks are ridiculously expensive now. One round of 2 drinks can set you back $50 USD in many venues. Ouch.

My BF has had a longstanding practice of NEVER buying a woman a drink when first meeting someone. Points taken off if a woman expected it of him, no matter how hot.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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The_411

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If you see a woman and offer to buy her a drink you’ve lowered your value. You are basically paying a woman to indulge you, which puts you behind the 8 ball immediately.

If a woman asks you to buy her a drink and you comply it’s even worse as you’ve emasculated yourself.

Buying drinks should be reserved for people when they’ve done something for you, when the drinks will be reciprocated and if you’ve invited people out.
 

meldiamond

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If you see a woman and offer to buy her a drink you’ve lowered your value. You are basically paying a woman to indulge you, which puts you behind the 8 ball immediately.

If a woman asks you to buy her a drink and you comply it’s even worse as you’ve emasculated yourself.

Buying drinks should be reserved for people when they’ve done something for you, when the drinks will be reciprocated and if you’ve invited people out.
Yeah, that's exactly where I'm at. I'm just curious as I see just about every brosef buying girls drinks. It's definitely the norm around here and probably many other places as well.
 
U

user43770

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Girl: Buy me a drink.

Me: I was about to ask you the same god damned thing. What's your name?
 
U

user43770

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Girl: My name is blah

Me: Ok, blah, what makes you think I would buy you a drink?

Girl: blah

Me: No ma'am. I don't do the drink buying. So why are you here?
 

marmel75

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Imo, its a weak move that says "I have no confidence and I'm not worth talking to so I'll bribe you to talk to me with a drink".

This is in a bar setting where you dont know the person...on a date then ya I typically expect to buy the drink.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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