Buying Condoms

[Interpol]

I think buying condoms is much less embarassing than buying like diarreah medicine or adult diapers or stuff like that...I mean getting laid isn't something to be ashamed of...

 

[Luscious]

Why be embarrassed to show off that you're pulling the ladies and you're getting laid?

Clerks don't care about the condoms. A purchase is a purchase. Man, people buy all sorts of stuff at drug stores...imagine having to pick up a genital herpes prescription!

If people can roll up into the store and proudly claim their prescriptions for herpes and the such, you can buy condoms. Hell, live life dangerously and buy two boxes.

 

[GlutusMaximus86]

Don't worry about it, as everyone as said the cashier dosen't give a damn. I worked as a cashier/pharmacy technecian at Kmart over the summer and people bought all sorts of werid sh*t but I never thought twice about it. The only thing I was thinking about with the items was the best way to bag them (since I was never really good with that). I never once thought to myself, "I wonder why this man needs Preparhation H, he must be f*cked up" or "Why does this women need vagisal, she must be gross?"

I actually had one girl (11 or 12 years old) when she was buying a training bra with her family and a friend tell me "that isn't for me it's for my friend" and she pointed to her friend. I wasn't sure what to say to that so I just said "ummm ok". That was actually embarrassing for me cause I didn't know what to say that wouldn't make me sound like a sick pedophial. So you see you can even embarass the cashier if you play your cards right.

 

[diablo]

Originally posted by Luscious
Hell, live life dangerously and buy two boxes.

If you're going to do that, why not go all-out? Here's the list of things I expect you to bring to the cash register, all as one purchase:

• 2 boxes of condoms
• 1 bottle of flavored lubricant
• 1 nylon rope, 20' length
• 1 pair of handcuffs from the "toys" section
• 1 bananna
• 1 pack of those vitamin "supplements" claiming to increase your stamina
• 1 quart of motor oil

I don't know about you, but I think that might raise some eyebrows. When he asks about the motor oil (and I'm fairly sure he might), just tell him to leave it to his imagination.

 

[Eternal]

Originally posted by diablo
If you're going to do that, why not go all-out? Here's the list of things I expect you to bring to the cash register, all as one purchase:

• 2 boxes of condoms
• 1 bottle of flavored lubricant
• 1 nylon rope, 20' length
• 1 pair of handcuffs from the "toys" section
• 1 bananna
• 1 pack of those vitamin "supplements" claiming to increase your stamina
• 1 quart of motor oil

I don't know about you, but I think that might raise some eyebrows. When he asks about the motor oil (and I'm fairly sure he might), just tell him to leave it to his imagination.

Good grief man! Are you insane!

































































You forgot the blindfold, bottle of syrup, and the sparkplug.

 

[Ken785]

i dont know why this guy is afraid of buying condoms...if i rung up a dude for condoms i would be thinking "damn this dudes a pimp...hes gonna get laid"

 

[bfl]

shoot im proud and i feel good when i go and buy condoms as a matterfact i like to see people watching me buying them, lets them know u gettin some, i specially like it when it is a female cashier though

 

[AverageFC]

i think it's simple:

if you're not mature enough to buy condoms, you're not mature enough to have sex.

edit: I just saw diablo's post. The motor oil is the best part. I really wanna go shop with your list to freak somebody out hahahha

 

[CadillacCTS]

Go to one of those adult toy stores and ask for a condom. For some reason it's way easier.

 

[sfalexi]

Originally posted by CadillacCTS
Go to one of those adult toy stores and ask for a condom. For some reason it's way easier.

I'm betting that if the person can't go to a grocery store to buy condoms, getting him to walk into an adult toy store is gonna be WAY too much.

 

[diablo]

I have a solution!

Send me $11 via PayPal and I will be glad to purchase a standard 3-pack box of condoms for you and mail them out at no additional charge. They will be sent in an anoymous bubble mailer with no indicators as to the contents of the package. This offer is only good if you are in the continental United States. Should you require more condoms, or a larger sized box, let me know and we can negotiate the price. Shipping will be done via USPS First Class mail, with an average delivery time of 3 days.

 

[Andromax]

will you buy me some gay porn for $20?

I mean ... its for my roommate...

 

[oOh Nasty]

are you f*cking serious?

 

[AlwaysExcel]

LOL! Diablo, that list is hilarious! Reminds me of my last condom purchase. I was just going to buycondoms but remembered I needed mayo too so I grabbed two jars. I realized how this looked when I got to the register and I started to smile. The clerk, however, acted hypnotized by his repetitive work and didn't seem to notice. So I brought attention to my hilarious purchase by telling him that, despite what he may think I wasn't using these items together. When he snapped out of his trance he was like "oh shyt!" and started busting up laughing.

 

[Donald Kaufman]

Ask the girl to buy them. Tell her that way she will get the type she wants. As you discuss it make sure she understands that you expect her to have vast comparative shopping knowledge and perhaps even have developed a brand loyalty. If she feigns ignorance ask her to call home for advice.

 

[KillingTime]

1.Big deal, just be really bold and loudly say "I want to buy this big box of condoms or whatever"... if your bold then you don't come off shy, joke about it or whatever.

2. Buy a bunch of other crap you need and just toss em in the mix, they won't stand out as much.

3. ... BUY THEM ONLINE! There's a bunch of places, hell do it on ebay.

 

[TyTe`EyEs]

Go to a health clinic and get free ones.

 

[OzyBoy]

Who cares? I would just go into a store and buy them, and not give a **** what anyone thinks, its not like they are going to stop you from buying them anyway.

 

[Sardaukar]

You need to desensitise yourself.

1. Go to the cashier, and ask him where the condoms are. Make sure there are people nearby so they can hear you.

2. Ask him loudly if you can try the condoms on for size.

3. When he says no, say loudly: "What? I can't even try condoms on for size??? This planet SUCKS!"


--------------------------

I am not joking.

Just reading this, you will think it easier to just go up to the counter and pay for it silently.

If not, then do the three steps above.

 

[Kourt]

haha I bought condoms the other day. I couldnt find them so I had to ask him where they were, mildly embarassing but w/e. So I get in the check-out line. The cashier tells the person in front of me "have a good night" then after I checked out he said "I dont think I need to tell You to have a good night" rotfl yeah its not that big of a deal, just do it