"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Bring up the Ex-Boyfriend?

A

ARrocket

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So this girl I met last semester (we're in college) had a boyfriend, but we had great chemistry and flirted a lot. She was my dance partner in tango class, so we saw each other a few times a week. She's asked me to hang out a few times, but we never really met up outside of class. Now, I see that she is listed as single on Facebook. I'm gonna have lunch with her at her dorm on Thursday (I'm have a class basically next door). Should I bring up her ex at all? As in "so, how are things with your boyfriend?" Because the last time I saw her she was dating this guy, and so it would be natural for me to think she still is. Or is it better to not mention it, and to proceed as if she has been single this whole time? Sorry if this is a bit wordy, but any advice would be appreciated!
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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T

TheCzar

Don Juan
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My question would be, why does it matter? Let her give up the information on her own accord if she wants. It's kind of a loaded question - it's going to firstly flag 'high interest', and secondly has the potential to bring up emotions for her ex-bf if that's the case. Keep the conversation light, no relationship talk.

Sometimes when I think of a question like that I'm thinking of asking, I think what if she asked me that?

TC
 
2

2crudedudes

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I read or heard somewhere once that you need to help her associate you with having a good time. If you bring up painful events (as break ups can sometimes be) she'll associate you with those painful emotions. Try to stay on positive subjects and practice kino to indicate you don't wanna get friend-zoned.
 
K

katatonia

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Don't bring up her ex at all, just be a more attractive guy to her and she will most likely forget about him on her own.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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J

jnice48146

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Yeah, asking about her love life in the past sounds like an express lane to the friend zone. If a girl brings that up on a date, I'd tell her I'm not the person to tell that to.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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