i want to break up with my girlfriend but everytime i broke up with her she hurts so bad and i feel sorry thats why i keep on coming back tio her,, need some advice DJ's.. Plus shes not my ideal girl becuase she is 3 years older than me.
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break up
- Thread starter Maxkiller
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BackInTheGame78
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3 years older? I mean that is a silly reason to next a woman but I take it you must be really young.
i
im 22 and she' 25 already
yeah, that's why i comeback to her so she will not do suicide
BackInTheGame78
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Yeah... exactly...once you get over 35 you stop thinking like that
bat soup
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Don't let someone take your life hostage. It's your life, not hers.
In the end you have to do what's right for you. She was fine before you met her and she'll be fine after you leave. In fact, she'll probably be banging another guy within two weeks.
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
You’ve said that you want to break up “because she’s 3 years older”. That’s not the real reason. You are attributing the real reasons to the fact that she is 3 years older. What are the real issues that are caused by her being older?
It sounds like you still care about her and you're afraid she might commit suicide.
Normally I advocate to rip off the bandage fast, as that is the best course for action. But sounds like she's threatening you with her taking her life.
Another breakup method I've used before is to get her to be totally disgusted with you and lose interest and therefore she breaks up with you instead.
Find everything that would disgust her and start doing those. Also act beta, needy, weak, possessive, untrusting, clingy. This stuff will always turn off women eventually. Also do habits that would get under her skin, like being messy, dirty, being late, always whining/complaining, etc.
This is something you can always try.
Normally I advocate to rip off the bandage fast, as that is the best course for action. But sounds like she's threatening you with her taking her life.
Another breakup method I've used before is to get her to be totally disgusted with you and lose interest and therefore she breaks up with you instead.
Find everything that would disgust her and start doing those. Also act beta, needy, weak, possessive, untrusting, clingy. This stuff will always turn off women eventually. Also do habits that would get under her skin, like being messy, dirty, being late, always whining/complaining, etc.
This is something you can always try.
Modern Man Advice
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@Maxkiller I agree with @Lookatu here. Normally, you would want to break up fast and go in no contact right away but in this case, since you still care and she is unstable a slow approach is best here. Be intentional with the everyday actions that will make her unattached to you as mentioned above.
Modern Man Advice
i
tried that dude and she noticed it and telling me im doing this to push her away
EyeBRollin
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Go to her house or apartment... a "safe space." Do NOT do this at your place. Break up with her one on one, in person. Tell her it is not her it is you.
"Something is wrong with me I just fell out of love."
After she cries for a few minutes simply tell her you feel like a jerk for doing it, then get up and walk out. Block her phone number and all forms of social media. Do not talk to her ever again.
Men, if you going to play the game you have to get used to breaking up with a lot of girls and not feel bad about it. If the roles were reversed, do you think she would feel the least bit bad about dumping you?
"Something is wrong with me I just fell out of love."
After she cries for a few minutes simply tell her you feel like a jerk for doing it, then get up and walk out. Block her phone number and all forms of social media. Do not talk to her ever again.
Men, if you going to play the game you have to get used to breaking up with a lot of girls and not feel bad about it. If the roles were reversed, do you think she would feel the least bit bad about dumping you?
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
If you haven't broken off things with her yet, then you are not ready to do it. When you are ready you'll pull the trigger. You are still young, have likely never broken things off with a woman. Really you have to get used to this.
Know this... she is 25... she will cry... rage... get upset... call her girlfriends and sisters, they will surround her and talk about what an idiot you are, how awesome she is... they will celebrate by burning your pictures, and tearing up anything you own that is within reach. She'll be fine... a week or so later, she'll go on a dating app and will be banging other dudes before you know it, and trying to rub your face in it.
If this helps, know she will be fine. She's a chick, relationships are their jam, she knows this is coming, don't bother giving her a reason just tell her things aren't working out and you are moving on. REMEMBER you do not have to be honest here, don't say anything you don't have to. You have a reason, and if know it's going to hurt her worst... then DON'T say it.... just let her believe you are an idiot, and will be sorry when she is one. Suicide is no joke, but know VERY few women actually kill themselves over dudes. But what you need to do is tell her family she has made this threat.
Know this... she is 25... she will cry... rage... get upset... call her girlfriends and sisters, they will surround her and talk about what an idiot you are, how awesome she is... they will celebrate by burning your pictures, and tearing up anything you own that is within reach. She'll be fine... a week or so later, she'll go on a dating app and will be banging other dudes before you know it, and trying to rub your face in it.
If this helps, know she will be fine. She's a chick, relationships are their jam, she knows this is coming, don't bother giving her a reason just tell her things aren't working out and you are moving on. REMEMBER you do not have to be honest here, don't say anything you don't have to. You have a reason, and if know it's going to hurt her worst... then DON'T say it.... just let her believe you are an idiot, and will be sorry when she is one. Suicide is no joke, but know VERY few women actually kill themselves over dudes. But what you need to do is tell her family she has made this threat.
Black Widow Void
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I'm sure that I'm not the only forum member that's known and/or known of men that ended their lives over a woman. While it's true that women commit suicide too... ever known one that did this over the loss of a man? The likely answer to this is "no."
And here's another question; ever known a woman that used emotional guilt to manipulate a man?
Think about this; Women are very crafty with toying with your conscience.... but when's the last time you ever heard a woman utter the phrase.. "my conscience. was bothering me."
I get it. I also don't like hurting women (I've delayed breakups when they had exams coming up, lost a family member etc...) but we do this on our terms and based on our decision.
My money is on this ---- I suspect that when this is over, you'll either see a cold and/or vindictive side to her that you never imagined existed.
And here's another question; ever known a woman that used emotional guilt to manipulate a man?
Think about this; Women are very crafty with toying with your conscience.... but when's the last time you ever heard a woman utter the phrase.. "my conscience. was bothering me."
I get it. I also don't like hurting women (I've delayed breakups when they had exams coming up, lost a family member etc...) but we do this on our terms and based on our decision.
My money is on this ---- I suspect that when this is over, you'll either see a cold and/or vindictive side to her that you never imagined existed.
Glassguy
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Call the cops on her when she uses this weak manipulation tool.
Run from her. She is crazy.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
I honestly do not know any. I've called things off with women more than a few times, ALL OF THEM have had a new dude to torture within a month. Seriously... women are biologically built to get over the loss of a man fast. They feel things intensely for a short period of time and their emotional state allows then to move from sadness to happiness pretty fast. They evolved over thousands of years to get over the loss of a mate fast, because though most of human history, a female, without a male to protect her was in a lot of trouble so she had to move on fast. She will move form sad to ticked off really fast, she'll get mad because women are not used to being rejected, she'll be more upset about being rejected than losing you, then she'll be fine.
Wow that makes total sense I never thought of it’s an explanation
OP, if my way didn't work on her, call her bluff and end it abruptly and as others said, go no contact and block her from all communication channels. @Black Widow Void makes a very good point.
Even more so now I would say with all the online support groups, online validation, online option, male thirst these days where women can rebound so much more easily than pre-internet era. So the chances of her just ending her life is very slim IMO.
My guess is if you ended it now, she would have a new guy within a few months easily. No need to feel sorry for her. You should be feeling sorry for all the guys that get dumped and that don't have the kind of options women have these days to make a quick rebound.
