"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Boyfriend or sugar daddy? Ever a proper venue to approach?

ThisNThat

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This is a bit of a two-parter. At least it evolved into one. lol...perhaps even multiple issues here.


There's this woman I started talking to that I met through certain geek Facebook circles that's coming to a convention in the states. She's British and is flying in over the weekend. I saw on her Facebook would COULD be her boyfriend, but he seemed a little too old...so assumed he was an older relative or co-worker.

I've been chatting with her online here and there, as with other women that is coming to this convention and I asked if she was flying solo.

She said that she was, but will be meeting up with a group of friends once she gets there.

Then I had asked her about dating and if she was single. She said, "No I have a boyfriend, he's on the cover of my FB page" and I said, "Oh, and you're coming without him?"

She said, "Well, he's 20 years older and isn't into the geek stuff I'm into." and I said, "Oh, I figured he was an older relative or co-worker or something.lol"

Then she kind of got a little on the defensive, saying "I hope you haven't been stalking me on FB, because I'm not there to get hit on."

And I said, "Oh, no...I don't mess around with taken women, I was just thinking that guy in your photo was someone else."

Although, I find it rather odd she'd travel across the globe without a sig. other in tow...regardless of his interests, yes?

I dunno, even if I wasn't into the same thing she was....I wouldn't be cool with a woman going without me...so that's always questionable. Sometimes I wonder if he's just her sugar daddy since he's 20 years older. Who knows, he could wind up tagging someone else while she's away while he funds her world travel. lol

She probably only THINKS she's in a relationship, yes?

I said, "Well, Im sure there are plenty of unattached ladies to talk to" and she said, "Well, the women don't go there to be 'hit on' they are there to have 'fun".

And I'm thinking, "Whatever, man...there's going to be thousands there...so who the F cares"

It seems women like to shame men into not approaching women in a venue other than a speed dating event or singles mixers.

"Don't approach us women because we're not THERE to be HIT ON!"

Of course you are....but only if he's cute enough, right?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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lizardking82

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Typical, stupid, woman. "Women are not there to get hit on". Women and men are everywhere to ALSO get hit on and they get hit on everytime, all the time. I mean, maybe you got the nerves to deal with this stupid *****, but I would not.
 

Doctor Europeo

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That´s why many people here always say never to listen to most women´s advice on women.
 

SgtSplacker

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All that talk about not wanting to be hit on makes me think she's just traveling solo to just gobble the most cawcks she can.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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devilkingx2

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She sounds like an overly arrogant b!tch, bragging about her boyfriend so hard and telling you that she isnt there to be hit on
 

MrAddiction

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There is about as much chemistry between you both, as there was between the second Blues Brothers.

You can blame the woman, but from what I can understand, you are orbiting her. And you aren't even really flirting.

You even told her, "oh no - I don't do things like that!".

Come on now, mate....
I thought something alike.

Pook probably would have put it in that way: "...because I'm not there to get hit on." - means "because I am not there to get hit on by you!"
 
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