Best way top deal with an ex when you meet them?

[Stud No1]

ok, this girl, a HB9.5 if not 10 but an emotional liablitiy, was my gf of 3 years.

we broke up almost 3 months ago after she started going on about wanting space blah blah. i broke it up after she asked for the break but deep down she instigated it which hurt because in my mind i was the superior one of the relationship. just for the record im now glad we're apart, lets just say she wasnt right for me and i see that now.


BUT

how do i act to her when i meet her?


part of me wants to just ignore her, or worse tell her to piss off out of my face

my only true meeting with her since was out one night she walked past, i said 'hey, wats up', she stopped for a convo i didnt give her one. i wasnt at all akward but seemed to think it waas an akward meeting


so heres my options

(1) dont even acknowledge her at all
(2) acknowledge her but little else
(3) treat her like an friend and smile


the one im thinking of doing even though itd be completely fake (id rather tell ehr to **** off and how she wasted 3 years of my life tbh)....

(4) smile, chat, show interest in how shes doing, give her a really good convo and be everything she loved but more, maybe even buy her a drink and crack jokes. avoid reminising in anyway though and make zero sexual feeling. Have a glint in my eye and basically make it clear (implicitly) that im genuinely loving life (which is true) without her. just when she's enjoying my attention just leave her hanging. not in a rude way but just in a way as if, 'ok, times up ive got better things to do now, cya around'. if that cant hit a nerve what can??

that way im thinking it shows her ive got over her really fast. so fast i dont even put on her a pedestal and ignore her for 2 years (like most couples ive seen do). Surely that would play on her mind?


she already admitted when she asked for a break that she'd probably regret it. and also, tbh shes quite impressionable so i think this could truely hit a chord. or would this actually be a bad thing if she responds OTT and tries to get me back (all i want is a moral victory, not her anymore).

my only fear about this, apart from not covering up my actual contempt for her, is that she didnt give me the interest/time id need to cary this out. i doubt that'd be the case but if it was that could be disasterous as it might look like i was trying to get her back which would shoot me right in the freakin foot. the thought of that happening would make me cringe tbh


p.s- i already know i look better than ever, ive bought a whole new far more stylish wardrobe of clothes and nice jewelery, not OTT ofcourse but very tidy. so whatever the choice when she sees me she'll notice how much better i look. i actually make sure to not wear any old clothes anymore, its part of the new me


serious replies/experiences please guys

 

[wjh]

If I was in your shoes I would probably be polite, not intentionally trying to cause her pain, but short. I would close the door on the amount - and type - of attention she would receive from me. She doesn't deserve anything more than that. She would have to be just like any other woman I am not interested in pursuing any type of relationship with. Even friendship.

If you feel like being a prick, for your "moral victory" - don't even acknowledge her existence. But I don't agree with your motive and think it's unnecessary.

 

[Stud No1]

If I was in your shoes I would probably be polite, not intentionally trying to cause her pain, but short. I would close the door on the amount - and type - of attention she would receive from me. She doesn't deserve anything more than that. She would have to be just like any other woman I am not interested in pursuing any type of relationship with. Even friendship.

If you feel like being a prick, for your "moral victory" - don't even acknowledge her existence. But I don't agree with your motive and think it's unnecessary.

ill give that. itd be manipulative, but probably deserved and frankly itd make me feel good

 

[skirtChaser]

this is silly, why would you be thinking of a ex 3 months after?...why give it so much thought and effort? you need to get a life, and fast

 

[wjh]

this is silly, why would you be thinking of a ex 3 months after?...why give it so much thought and effort? you need to get a life, and fast

He's upset. He may have put his whole heart/head into the relationship. Granted he might have made mistakes, and maybe the death of the relationship was for the better, but I think he still resents her for the way it ended.

It's happened to me before.

But when every thing's all said and done, revenge isn't worth the trouble. It's better for your own peace of mind to just accept the fact that it's over (humility) and find other people to take up your thoughts and activities.

 

[skirtChaser]

who hasn't been there before?....you have to block your thinking, when I have something disturbing in my mind I attach another thought to it. then everytime I think of it I catch myself and think of the other thing. after awhile it goes away all together.
I agree about the no revenge thingy, just let karma do the rest, it always comes through.

 

[Stud No1]

this is silly, why would you be thinking of a ex 3 months after?...why give it so much thought and effort? you need to get a life, and fast

are you for real?

ANYBODY that has an ex, especially one that caused him/her anguish, will have some sort or similar thoughts. its not about being over them, there'll always be an unspoken thing going onn between ex's, you always like to look good when they see you dont you? but maybe you're different than anyone ive ever seen.

have you ever been in a serious LTR?

 

[Stud No1]

who hasn't been there before?....you have to block your thinking, when I have something disturbing in my mind I attach another thought to it. then everytime I think of it I catch myself and think of the other thing. after awhile it goes away all together.
I agree about the no revenge thingy, just let karma do the rest, it always comes through.

absolutely. her losing me is the karma imo, i guess i just want to speed up the process of it hitting her for my enjoyment.

honestly i dont even think about this girl (well not very much) i already see i should have dated another girl back then which is the girl ive now got oneitis for

i guess im bitter she actually messed my chances up with this other girl (which so far seems to be the case if you read my other threads)

 

[aliasguy]

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I completely understand the bitterness and anger. Truly. I've been there, and to be honest, there's a little residual anger and bitterness in me, too.

But, if you really believe in "karma" (the REAL karma as understood by those who've preached it as part of their true philosophy and faith, not the 'california karma') then you might well have to wait until your next lives for it to kick in.

Better to just live your life. Forget her.

Even if "karma" is real (I really don't buy it, but that doesn't matter), it isn't your means of retribution.

HER karmic debt isn't to you! It's to "everything," or the "universe." It isn't for you, it's actually "for" HER. To "help" her.

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[Poonani Maker]

If I was in your shoes I would probably be polite, not intentionally trying to cause her pain, but short. I would close the door on the amount - and type - of attention she would receive from me. She doesn't deserve anything more than that. She would have to be just like any other woman I am not interested in pursuing any type of relationship with. Even friendship.

If you feel like being a prick, for your "moral victory" - don't even acknowledge her existence. But I don't agree with your motive and think it's unnecessary.

Best advice, right here. BE short. Don't even call her by her name, even if she blurts out your name. Just act like you've gotta getter going. You're busy. Bye.

 

[skirtChaser]

maybe if you believed in karma yourself you could possibly let go of all your bitterness.

 

[Stud No1]

i dont believe in karma one bit atually

 

[Bible_Belt]

me either. If I did, I'd say that b!tch owes me.

it might look like i was trying to get her back which would shoot me right in the freakin foot. the thought of that happening would make me cringe

'Get her back' is different when you mean as a gf. I think it's ok to get her back just for sex. In fact, if you wanted revenge, the best kind would be to seduce her, make her fall for you again, fvck her, and then later make it obvious that you were just using her for sex.

 

[aliasguy]

me either. If I did, I'd say that b!tch owes me.

it might look like i was trying to get her back which would shoot me right in the freakin foot. the thought of that happening would make me cringe

'Get her back' is different when you mean as a gf. I think it's ok to get her back just for sex. In fact, if you wanted revenge, the best kind would be to seduce her, make her fall for you again, fvck her, and then later make it obvious that you were just using her for sex.

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yep, that's it.

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[Stud No1]

Best advice, right here. BE short. Don't even call her by her name, even if she blurts out your name. Just act like you've gotta getter going. You're busy. Bye.

yeah, tahts what i did the first time we met

but i suppose i just thought id give her a reminder of my good personality that she always loved then quickly snap if away from her. treat her good then all of a sudden become preoccupied and move on. i cant help thinking itd feel great

 

[Poonani Maker]

yeah, tahts what i did the first time we met

but i suppose i just thought id give her a reminder of my good personality that she always loved then quickly snap if away from her. treat her good then all of a sudden become preoccupied and move on. i cant help thinking itd feel great

Only way, is to have her SEE you in a better position, like a Stamp of approval from the outside world. THEN, you go deadlock silent. Don't say a word. Just look at her in a scornful condescending way, as if you were her father in disapproval of his daughter. This is a look from you of sorrow. I really feel sorry for you, ____. You had your chance. I loved you. You took me for granted. Now your salvation is gone.

 

[Stud No1]

me either. If I did, I'd say that b!tch owes me.

it might look like i was trying to get her back which would shoot me right in the freakin foot. the thought of that happening would make me cringe

'Get her back' is different when you mean as a gf. I think it's ok to get her back just for sex. In fact, if you wanted revenge, the best kind would be to seduce her, make her fall for you again, fvck her, and then later make it obvious that you were just using her for sex.

lol. nah truely not interested in ever being intimate with her again. if you seen her you'd think im mad for saying that, but seriously, not my thing. although admittedly if i really wanted to go that far, and im almost 100% sure i could, i would probably break her

but thats never been me. she knows im a man of integrity and she'll miss that with time. ive got alot of dirt on her i could seriously destroy her whole reputation with but ill never let it slip. at worst, im proud of myself, i practise what i preach

 

[skirtChaser]

ok maybe if some old g/f gave some dude HIV, ok I could see wanting to punch her out, but just some chick with a 1up on a breakup?...nah....they always end up doing me a favor.
anybody here ever notice when somebody has major trauma to the heart, something really good happens shortly down the road?....always has for me. major ordeals always make somebody a better person, so go and enjoy the new and improved you and forget about the past.

 

[Stud No1]

Only way, is to have her SEE you in a better position, like a Stamp of approval from the outside world. THEN, you go deadlock silent. Don't say a word. Just look at her in a scornful condescending way, as if you were her father in disapproval of his daughter. This is a look from you of sorrow. I really feel sorry for you, ____. You had your chance. I loved you. You took me for granted. Now your salvation is gone.

i like it

already, thats starting to filter id imagine. her sister, im sure will have already told her how well im looking these days (she keeps telling me). she'll also hear how i turned down her friend the other day, which, i twistedly will raise my value as much i hate that system.

what do you mean exactly about a better position? with a girl? or just generally? socially? or material things like a nice car, well-paid job? either way, all of these are pending



heres something off topic, but twisted for ya's.

my brothers gf never admitted that my ex was stunning, she always played it down. now we've broke up she's admitted she was 'off the scale'. she was smiply jealous of her getting all the attention from my brother and the rest of my family. isnt that comical.

 

[Stud No1]

ok maybe if some old g/f gave some dude HIV, ok I could see wanting to punch her out, but just some chick with a 1up on a breakup?...nah....they always end up doing me a favor.
anybody here ever notice when somebody has major trauma to the heart, something really good happens shortly down the road?....always has for me. major ordeals always make somebody a better person, so go and enjoy the new and improved you and forget about the past.

listen buddy, i agree. my life's never been better, ive never been happier already.

i guess i just wanted to seal the whole thing by rubbing it in her face and giving me the perfect closure