"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Best response to a postponed/cancelled date?

B

Buddhistguy

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Hey there,

Looking for some advice on the best way to respond when a girl cancels on a first meeting.

I have been chatting to a girl off the internet for about two weeks. Things were going well, and she gave me her number last week. We spoke twice on the phone, and arranged to meet for coffee tomorrow. Over the weekend, she sent me three e-mails. As I was trying to play it cool, I responded only once in this time. Today, I recieved this e-mail (please keep in mind she is recently arrived from Europe. so her English isn't great)

"Header: No Coffee Tomorrow

Hello dear but I think that would be better is we move the coffe for another day tomorrow I found my self a bit busy... as I need to finish some studies in a short time. SO I think tha could be better if we just meet up another day meaby in the holiday brake... And the problem is also that I'm always busy during the week... Sorry about it, speak to you soon a kiss ****"

Should I treat this as a blowoff and move on? or could she be genuinely busy? Any advice would be appreciated.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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W

Wyldfire

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My son works with a young woman from the Ukraine who came to the US to study and work. The girl works 3 jobs and is studying. It might be that the girl you're talking to is in the same boat and really is very busy.
 
N

nishbuk

Master Don Juan
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Wyldfire could be right...but don't get your hopes up! Where is your backup plan? Are there other girls that you are concentrating on?

If a girl did that to me, I'd call her back only ONE time again. I would wait for about week though. Set a date, then hang up. If she flakes it's a definite "next".

You only ever give a girl 2 chances in the begining. Depending on how she acts, I may only give her one. If a girl is really interested in you, she will cancel her plans to go out on a date with you.
 
D

Derek Flint

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Ask her how she plans on making it up to you.

Always have the stronger frame.
 
K

ketostix

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Oh god, no one's that busy, especially considering she had time to chat, email, and she agreed to the date..Buddhistguy it sounds like a blow off, and I would call her on it. I don't know say maybe to the effect, "you made plans so I expect you to folow through on them or make reasonable alternative plans..." I don't know it's always a tough situation but you might be able to pull back for a few days or a week and call her again, but I'd be moving on while the getting out is good.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

G

Gangster Of Love

Master Don Juan
Joined
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Los Angeles
Originally posted by Derek Flint
Ask her how she plans on making it up to you.

Always have the stronger frame.
Click to expand...

Exactly.

Tell her she is on probation, for being flaky, and make fun of her in a funny way, but at the same time saying you won't tolerate it.
 
D

DonJuanMonk

Master Don Juan
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She could be busy, but consider this a blowoff. Would she make time for some rich guy like Brad Pitt? See the dillemma?

Send her a friendly message hoping you'll meet sometime and don't contact her anymore afterwards. Go about your business, and look forward to spending time with a woman who will not waste your time.

Now if you do what the other guys say which works along the lines of "You messed up, now you must do what I say" - No don't do that. Just wish her well, walk away, live your life.
 
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