"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Best Advice Ever To Get Your Ex Back!!
- Thread starter soulforge
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
TheProspect
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Such advice reads like the people who give it have a latent fetish for cuckoldry.
Anyways, most seasoned men here know the best way to get your ex back is the same exact thing you do if you genuinely do not want to associate with her ever again: Go no contact and work on yourself.
After going through a few breakups and doing the "wrong" and "right" things during a breakup, most experienced men learn that trying to get your ex back never works, and on the off chance it seemingly does, the relationship is never the same as it was before and the inevitable subsequent breakup is always worse/harder.
You do not have to visualize your ex being sexually involved with anyone to move on. Instead, you have to through experience, or by the wisdom of others, learn that certain things are counterproductive and should be avoided, such as pursuing exes and continuing to involve yourself with women who have little to no interest in you.
I fixed a couple thing for you bro.
The broad pictured is straight disgusting, nice cherry on top to let it sink in for them boys having 2nd doubts.
Glassguy
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Facts.
I understand trying to communicate about a difference in opinion or something easily fixed in an otherwise very healthy relationship.
But when a chick wants to end things, its 100% best to just say "OK! I agree" and BLOCK.
Trust me, if she has any thought of not letting you go, she will come screaming back.
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Serenity
Moderator
I can actually understand it, but I do not agree with it. The intention is to emphasize that she was always a slut or a bad woman, so there's no reason to want her back, it's a way to force psychological distance. What feels wrong about it to you and me is that it's tainted with bitterness and contempt towards women, stemming from a perceived feeling of injustice after negative personal experiences with women.
It's understandable to me, but it's not a productive or healthy way to handle it. It misplaces focus outside of oneself, it blinds a man from realizing his own flaws as he's blaming it on her flaws. Maybe she was flawed, maybe she wasn't, but it doesn't matter in terms of improving oneself in order to have the best chance of success in the future.
It's a victim mentality. There's nothing more than a very thin veneer of personal responsibility "move the fvck on", no further understanding of what actually drives a man to commit these mistakes, possibly over and over. There's no depth, no understanding of what to actually do differently, how to do it or why.
To revive a word I haven't seen used on this forum for a while now, to imagine your ex getting her organs rearranged by Tyrone or Chad is just a crutch. It's a weak attempt at solving a symptom rather than addressing and fixing the cause of the problem. It's a diversion from where the real problem lies, oneself!
Bokanovsky
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