"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Being "Weird" or "Different"

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Kriscam23

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So Suave,

I want the know the reason or cause of being perceived as being negatively called "weird" or "different". To me things are not good things for a DJ to be called.

I'm a attractive guy at my school, girls literally stalk me sometimes...but when they meet me I feel like the attraction always waivers away. Many time I've been called different, but being different does not attract more females.

Of course I want to be my own man and be unique, but when does it past to socially awkward and weird? These aren't good attributes to have in my opinion.

How can I change this?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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FairShake

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When you say "school" are you talking about "high school?" Because don't sweat being "weird" in high school. High school is a rigid place when it comes to social attitudes. There are clear lines and woe is the person who regularly crosses them.

Trust me when I say this changes in college and the real world. Being a weird or different guy is an advantage in a big city. Combine it with a nice and interesting personality and certain types of girls will be all over you. And they are the RIGHT kind of girls, not the brainless *****es.
 
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Night-hawk

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Didn't we already discuss this topic in another thread.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Kriscam23

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Hm. Interesting, but I was referring to college. Pretty big school, (Florida State)
 
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FairShake

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Kriscam23 said:
Hm. Interesting, but I was referring to college. Pretty big school, (Florida State)
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OK, I will admit I am surprised it is happening in college. In college people are usually more eager to express their individuality (somewhat) and you can usually find someone more like yourself than high school. Plus people are growing and often that means more open to different things. Maybe Florida State isn't like this...

I think college is probably too late to not be "different." If you are different now you have probably been different your whole life. I don't think you can start all over in your 20s if that's who you are. I'd stop concentrating on being popular at this point. Concentrate on making the best friends you can. Guys and girls who don't give a sh!t if you're weird. Those are also the kind of girls you can date. I'd try to meet girls through your social circle. If they are friends of your friends they might tolerate a misfit better.
 
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