No, I am still going to so say goodbye, just had to do it delicately that's all.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Being the backup guy sucks!
- Thread starter lexab
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
grayclif
Master Don Juan
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- Oct 27, 2009
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She didn't delicately disrespect you and insult you.
The problem is this. You say delicately because you want to make sure she sticks around. And the reason she feels like she can say these type of things to you is because you an emasculated orbiter who won't tell her about her disrepectful tendancies. Man up bro and go no contact.
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PantyWhisperer
Master Don Juan
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- Jul 21, 2016
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- 536
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I agree with the no contact. I am/was/is in a similar situation, except we have had sex once, but she keeps me on the back burner, and like the OP hides or lies current relationships but wants me to mop up when they end. She goes dark or gets snippy every time she is in a relationship, so it's not too hard to tell. I've sort of allowed myself to be in the on deck circle for years, mainly because I don't have to put much in to keep the back burner status. Add to that, she's an HB8 and 31 - I am 50, plus a freak in the sheets so I do tend to put up with a little more to stay in her orbit.
Lately, and being inspired to continue it by these forums, I have had her in NC for 44 days today. That's a personal best. Usually they go no longer than 2-3 weeks before she chirps back in but this time she has an ex-convict boyfriend (who she denies is her boyfriend because "I hate labels") who spends at least 3 nights a week with her. So she has done the normal liking of my occasional social media post, just to sort of kick test me to make sure I'm still in her orbit. I'm like her Personal Floatation device.
I do want to see if I can make the full 60 day NC. Also, full disclosure - she is a side piece and I am married. I've been way too beta with this one, in hindsight, which is why she keeps waving in these alpha, bad-boy, white trash dogs. She's a single mom whose mother is raising her kid mostly so the guys don't have to deal with the normal single mom BS. That's why they stay longer than most but even the trash moves on eventually - or mostly she nexts them because she is super shady and always has a flock of Tinder weenies orbiting her.
Lately, and being inspired to continue it by these forums, I have had her in NC for 44 days today. That's a personal best. Usually they go no longer than 2-3 weeks before she chirps back in but this time she has an ex-convict boyfriend (who she denies is her boyfriend because "I hate labels") who spends at least 3 nights a week with her. So she has done the normal liking of my occasional social media post, just to sort of kick test me to make sure I'm still in her orbit. I'm like her Personal Floatation device.
I do want to see if I can make the full 60 day NC. Also, full disclosure - she is a side piece and I am married. I've been way too beta with this one, in hindsight, which is why she keeps waving in these alpha, bad-boy, white trash dogs. She's a single mom whose mother is raising her kid mostly so the guys don't have to deal with the normal single mom BS. That's why they stay longer than most but even the trash moves on eventually - or mostly she nexts them because she is super shady and always has a flock of Tinder weenies orbiting her.