"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Beauty

zekko

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I was going to name this thread "Looks", but I thought it might cause some confusion.

I was reading some comments about how shallow men are when they are attracted to looks. Combine this with the general advice that women don't appreciate general compliments like "You are beautiful". They like compliments more tailor-made to them specifically. But if a woman thinks another woman is more attractive than she is, she will be jealous around her or insecure. Women should appreciate being called beautiful, IMO.

Are men shallow because they are attracted to looks? Maybe so. But I don't think women realize how, when a man looks at a certain woman, he can be struck right down to his soul by the way she looks. And this is not always a sexual thing, necessarily. A guy may look at a girl and think how cute, innocent, and sweet she looks. Of course, the man must keep his head in this situation, because as often as not, such a girl might be the filthiest slut on the planet.

A woman's looks might indicate the potential she has. Even though she may not live up to it. But a man is biologically built to react to a woman's look, there's no changing it. You should always be able to mentally override it with logic, but I don't think it means you are shallow. If that was ALL you cared about, yeah that's shallow. But the looks are the hook that brings the man to the table and want to get to know her better - to see if she lives up to that potential.

Although, some guys just want the sex, so that's one reason women are wary.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Desdinova

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The word "shallow" is very much misdirected when it comes to men being attracted to looks. It's like calling a lion "shallow" for preying on other animals for food instead of eating berries.

Women will throw the word around when they're jealous that an attractive male is fvcking women who are not her. She will never admit that she's not attractive, so she makes the male unattractive by slapping the "shallow" label on him.
 

Huffman

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Is it shallow to like based on looks? Looks can be improved easily, so that should be a relief!

People can't handle being dumped because they know it's not as shallow as they'd like.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Is it shallow to like based on looks? Looks can be improved easily, so that should be a relief!

People can't handle being dumped because they know it's not as shallow as they'd like.
What about if they got pumped before hand?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Atom Smasher

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The word "shallow" is very much misdirected when it comes to men being attracted to looks. It's like calling a lion "shallow" for preying on other animals for food instead of eating berries.

Women will throw the word around when they're jealous that an attractive male is fvcking women who are not her. She will never admit that she's not attractive, so she makes the male unattractive by slapping the "shallow" label on him.
An extremely insightful and well-articulated post, Des. You nailed it.
 

ZTIME

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Out of all of our senses, visual stimulation is the most prevalent. This is true for both men and women. Women will try to play it off like they care about the depth of a man's personality, but truth be told, she would have never tried to get to know him if she wasn't visually stimulated to begin with.

However, since each one of us filter information differently (sights, sounds, and smells) we all have a unique attraction profile.

Some of the common traits we as humans seem to respond to are physical fitness, nice smile, and body language which promotes confidence. The rest is all how unique individuals respond to it. Which is why no one is 100% effective with everyone.
 

zekko

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I still think women should appreciate it if they are called beautiful. Sure, it's a general compliment, but it can most certainly be genuine. If a guy is called handsome or hot that is a general compliment as well, but I don't know of many guys who wouldn't appreciate it.

Is it shallow to like based on looks? Looks can be improved easily, so that should be a relief!
Everyone here says that, I've never really agreed. I mean, yeah you can always to something to change your looks, and it might be a small improvement - new haircut, leaner face, etc. But most people are still going to look like themselves. There's only so much a person can do. If you're butt ugly to begin with, I'm not sure a new hairstyle is going to make that big of a difference.
 

Atom Smasher

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Even ugly-ish women can make themselves attractive because men respond to the paint and plaster on the face, the hair style, etc. and not the natural person underneath.

Hence the shocking out there where a person is compared with makeup and without.

Men generally see and respond to accoutrements and not to the real.
 

Huffman

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There's only so much a person can do. If you're butt ugly to begin with, I'm not sure a new hairstyle is going to make that big of a difference.
True! And I feel sorry for butt ugly people. It's not entirely fair because butt ugly isn't even on my radar. So that may be shallow indeed.

But still, for my personal experience, I happen to reject mostly girls that initially were a "maybe" and ended up an "almost". Those definitely had options.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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