"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Beauty

zekko

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I was going to name this thread "Looks", but I thought it might cause some confusion.

I was reading some comments about how shallow men are when they are attracted to looks. Combine this with the general advice that women don't appreciate general compliments like "You are beautiful". They like compliments more tailor-made to them specifically. But if a woman thinks another woman is more attractive than she is, she will be jealous around her or insecure. Women should appreciate being called beautiful, IMO.

Are men shallow because they are attracted to looks? Maybe so. But I don't think women realize how, when a man looks at a certain woman, he can be struck right down to his soul by the way she looks. And this is not always a sexual thing, necessarily. A guy may look at a girl and think how cute, innocent, and sweet she looks. Of course, the man must keep his head in this situation, because as often as not, such a girl might be the filthiest slut on the planet.

A woman's looks might indicate the potential she has. Even though she may not live up to it. But a man is biologically built to react to a woman's look, there's no changing it. You should always be able to mentally override it with logic, but I don't think it means you are shallow. If that was ALL you cared about, yeah that's shallow. But the looks are the hook that brings the man to the table and want to get to know her better - to see if she lives up to that potential.

Although, some guys just want the sex, so that's one reason women are wary.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Desdinova

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The word "shallow" is very much misdirected when it comes to men being attracted to looks. It's like calling a lion "shallow" for preying on other animals for food instead of eating berries.

Women will throw the word around when they're jealous that an attractive male is fvcking women who are not her. She will never admit that she's not attractive, so she makes the male unattractive by slapping the "shallow" label on him.
 

Huffman

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Is it shallow to like based on looks? Looks can be improved easily, so that should be a relief!

People can't handle being dumped because they know it's not as shallow as they'd like.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Is it shallow to like based on looks? Looks can be improved easily, so that should be a relief!

People can't handle being dumped because they know it's not as shallow as they'd like.
What about if they got pumped before hand?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Atom Smasher

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The word "shallow" is very much misdirected when it comes to men being attracted to looks. It's like calling a lion "shallow" for preying on other animals for food instead of eating berries.

Women will throw the word around when they're jealous that an attractive male is fvcking women who are not her. She will never admit that she's not attractive, so she makes the male unattractive by slapping the "shallow" label on him.
An extremely insightful and well-articulated post, Des. You nailed it.
 

ZTIME

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Out of all of our senses, visual stimulation is the most prevalent. This is true for both men and women. Women will try to play it off like they care about the depth of a man's personality, but truth be told, she would have never tried to get to know him if she wasn't visually stimulated to begin with.

However, since each one of us filter information differently (sights, sounds, and smells) we all have a unique attraction profile.

Some of the common traits we as humans seem to respond to are physical fitness, nice smile, and body language which promotes confidence. The rest is all how unique individuals respond to it. Which is why no one is 100% effective with everyone.
 

zekko

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I still think women should appreciate it if they are called beautiful. Sure, it's a general compliment, but it can most certainly be genuine. If a guy is called handsome or hot that is a general compliment as well, but I don't know of many guys who wouldn't appreciate it.

Is it shallow to like based on looks? Looks can be improved easily, so that should be a relief!
Everyone here says that, I've never really agreed. I mean, yeah you can always to something to change your looks, and it might be a small improvement - new haircut, leaner face, etc. But most people are still going to look like themselves. There's only so much a person can do. If you're butt ugly to begin with, I'm not sure a new hairstyle is going to make that big of a difference.
 

Atom Smasher

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Even ugly-ish women can make themselves attractive because men respond to the paint and plaster on the face, the hair style, etc. and not the natural person underneath.

Hence the shocking out there where a person is compared with makeup and without.

Men generally see and respond to accoutrements and not to the real.
 

Huffman

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There's only so much a person can do. If you're butt ugly to begin with, I'm not sure a new hairstyle is going to make that big of a difference.
True! And I feel sorry for butt ugly people. It's not entirely fair because butt ugly isn't even on my radar. So that may be shallow indeed.

But still, for my personal experience, I happen to reject mostly girls that initially were a "maybe" and ended up an "almost". Those definitely had options.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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