My Name is Nobody
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When you meet up with a chic for drinks and it's the first date, do you go and sit at the bar or get a table?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Bar or get a booth?
- Thread starter My Name is Nobody
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"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Kevin Andrew
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I'd go for the booth. Seems to me the possibilities are greater from a booth then at the bar.
MotownMack
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I am not a big fan of the bar, just because it's more awkward to face the person you're talking to. In the interest of developing rapport and good body language, I like to comfortably face them. You could do this at the bar, but it isn't as natural. I prefer the table or booth also.
After the first few dates, I don't think it really matters tho.
After the first few dates, I don't think it really matters tho.
My Name is Nobody
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alright cool thanks guys.. this girl is some kind of secret agent for the government.. she won't tell me about her job and she didn't talk much on the phone.
All I know is she is in the "anti terror" unit.. any advice how to handle this first date??
All I know is she is in the "anti terror" unit.. any advice how to handle this first date??
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
DavenJuan
Master Don Juan
MNIN..
is this for drinks or dinner or both??
If you are only going for drinks i would def. pick the bar. this outting is suppose to be a social outting and believe it or not, being around others makes it more of a social outting and helps create this persona.
if you are only going for dinner then i def would go to the booth. it calms things down a bit and a bit more intimate. even though you can still have the same intimacy at the the bar, it takes a bit more work since you are occupied with others conversation and entertainment.
if you are going for both, then obviously the ONE ****tail at the bar before you get sat at a booth tends to work wonders.
but if it were me. i always seem to choose the BAR first. i build rapport with the bartender showing social proof, mingle a bit with other patrons asking about drinks, showing her a good time. then i move to the BOOTH. we have built a bit of rapport and by time we get to the booth we know more about each other and it is a lot more relaxed.
IMO
is this for drinks or dinner or both??
If you are only going for drinks i would def. pick the bar. this outting is suppose to be a social outting and believe it or not, being around others makes it more of a social outting and helps create this persona.
if you are only going for dinner then i def would go to the booth. it calms things down a bit and a bit more intimate. even though you can still have the same intimacy at the the bar, it takes a bit more work since you are occupied with others conversation and entertainment.
if you are going for both, then obviously the ONE ****tail at the bar before you get sat at a booth tends to work wonders.
but if it were me. i always seem to choose the BAR first. i build rapport with the bartender showing social proof, mingle a bit with other patrons asking about drinks, showing her a good time. then i move to the BOOTH. we have built a bit of rapport and by time we get to the booth we know more about each other and it is a lot more relaxed.
IMO
My Name is Nobody
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DavenJuan said:MNIN..
is this for drinks or dinner or both??
If you are only going for drinks i would def. pick the bar. this outting is suppose to be a social outting and believe it or not, being around others makes it more of a social outting and helps create this persona.
if you are only going for dinner then i def would go to the booth. it calms things down a bit and a bit more intimate. even though you can still have the same intimacy at the the bar, it takes a bit more work since you are occupied with others conversation and entertainment.
if you are going for both, then obviously the ONE ****tail at the bar before you get sat at a booth tends to work wonders.
but if it were me. i always seem to choose the BAR first. i build rapport with the bartender showing social proof, mingle a bit with other patrons asking about drinks, showing her a good time. then i move to the BOOTH. we have built a bit of rapport and by time we get to the booth we know more about each other and it is a lot more relaxed.
IMO
We agreed to meet "for a beer" .. that's it.. anything could happen really... it's all up in the air.. we talked for a few min on the phone.. she wasn't talkative but agreed to the meeting. Maybe I will show up 10 min late and let HER pick where to sit.
See my previous post about her profession..
In Motion
Senior Don Juan
Say this: You know, I have a hidden bomb! IN MY PANTS!My Name is Nobody said:All I know is she is in the "anti terror" unit.. any advice how to handle this first date??
My Name is Nobody
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In Motion said:Say this: You know, I have a hidden bomb! IN MY PANTS!
I just LOL'd very loud.. I really did!
My Name is Nobody
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In Motion said:Say this: You know, I have a hidden bomb! IN MY PANTS!
Alright how's this:
A few minutes into the date I'll say "I have a hidden bomb in my pocket are you going to arrest me?"
If she says yes or anything like that I'm good to go!
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
You're already losing the battle. You're over analyzing and seeking an outcome.
You have to go with the follow and take control with her. You become the leader, and she will follow. Don't go into it expecting anything out of it, but be fun and exciting. Then she'll be into you. I'm sure of it.
You have to go with the follow and take control with her. You become the leader, and she will follow. Don't go into it expecting anything out of it, but be fun and exciting. Then she'll be into you. I'm sure of it.
My Name is Nobody
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Mavrick said:You're already losing the battle. You're over analyzing and seeking an outcome.
You have to go with the follow and take control with her. You become the leader, and she will follow. Don't go into expecting anything out of it, but fun and exciting. Then she'll be into you. I'm sure of it.
I hear you. I always post on here pre-date it's like a ritual for me. I get great lines like In Motion suggested, lol.. and other good advice. I would have never thought of the "bomb in my pocket" line if I didn't ask my friends here on sosuave. And you guys know I always follow up with a date report so we'll see what happens.
Plus, I think I'm ready... This can't be harder than going out with a lawyer.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
Dude you messed up the joke.My Name is Nobody said:Alright how's this:
A few minutes into the date I'll say "I have a hidden bomb in my pocket are you going to arrest me?"
If she says yes or anything like that I'm good to go!
That isn't even funny.
Ha! I thought the same thing.iqqi said:Dude you messed up the joke.
That isn't even funny.
My Name is Nobody
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Mods, could please merge this thread with the "date with a secret operative" thread? Results of the date are in there...
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.