"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Baltasar Gracián

resilient

Master Don Juan
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Lately I've been going back to my DJ roots. When I found SoSuave over a decade ago, I was getting into a lot of psychology, philosophy, sociology, and in general, empirical thinking at the time trying to understand myself, career aspirations, social skills, women, etc..

I found some wise old legends that influenced my way of thinking. Marcus Aurelius (Meditations), William James (Epistemology and Pragmatism), John Locke (Two Treatises of Government) and finally the Spanish Jesuit and baroque prose writer, Baltasar Gracian.


I read this quote today when randomly looking him up and this quote stood out to me. I think it has a direct correlation to interest level and the level of surprise unpredictability plays. It's a general rule around here that comfort zone = no/low growth = low interest level.

Don't show off every day, or you'll stop surprising people. There must always be some novelty left over. The person who displays a little more of it each day keeps up expectations, and no one ever discovers the limits of his talent. ​

So, I think, in essence. Don't reveal your hand too quickly or at all in a game of cards. Keep an edge factor. Sometimes do what people least expect you to do. I try not to beat myself too much of past LTRs, yet sometimes I'll wonder much later if I kept working on myself as the prize and had some fun impulsive hobbies/pursuits on the side if I could have kept interest level maintained a little higher. I.e. have a plate out of left field drop a text, hit me up on social media so that my main plate sees it and gets jealous or... disappear for a day here or there to do something really fun. In the present, I'm getting scuba open-water certification and plan to go up the ranks in diving as a DHV game plan.

Moral of the story... keep living, DJs. Surprise people. Surprise your family, friends, plates, LTR, whatever it is that people think you can't do or no desire to do... do it. Tomorrow is today. Accomplish your goals for yourself because you're a fun dude who's curious about life and has passions. Don't let others, women, or whoever it is say you can't do what you desire to do.

I'd like to thank, Baltasar Gracian for his timeless wisdom, I hope I can continue to grow and surprise myself.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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