"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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"Backup Guy"

yngad

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 5, 2006
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Over the last couple months i've realized i've become the "back up" guy for a couple girls and am starting to get fed up to the point i don't want to respond to their texts.

Girl A, friends from a while back we were really close but drifted apart. When she's not dating anyone she'll want to hang out and stuff but like clockwork when she finds a new guy - instant MIA. Earlier today she text me to see if I wanted to go to the book store (we used to do that a lot when we met years back) - how should i handle?

Girl B, met a few months back - will come over hang out on my bed or sits on the sofa super close but when i try and make a move she turns away. constantly txting during the day about bs stuff.

just getting fed up with it. what do you guys think?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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DonutMan

Don Juan
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Nov 14, 2007
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If you are just friends with them, then I wouldn't do anything. If your girlfriend was doing this to you then I would drop her. Sounds like they aren't interested in you romantically, so I would just let them do their thing. Even though it's difficult not to feel resentment and bitterness over things like that, they aren't attractive traits and won't help you get with either of them.
 

Mantis Toboggan

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 27, 2010
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You're in the friend zone. And it sounds like you aren't getting out. You should either forget about these chicks, or do what I do and use them for social proof when you're out at bars/night clubs.

When I go bar-hopping with girls I'm friends with, it makes other girls feel more comfortable approaching me.

It doesn't sound like these 2 girls are romantic prospects, so I don't know why you're worried about it. Use them or drop them. You'll be fine.
 

jnice48146

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 9, 2009
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The Great Lakes State
^ bump. Social proof is all these girl "friends" ( and that's ALL they are) are gonna be good for, unless you actuallly LIKE to talk about soaps, their boyfriends/ romantic prospects, what color to dye their hair, etc.
 
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