"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Back with the same adventure diff girl

sadonomspa

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Hey guys,

I have not posted here in awhile. Some might remember me. But here are my stats.

I was married. My wife joined the Navy. I thought she was BPD and you can see my past posts on that. She ****ed an 18 year old marine, left me, I find out later he was 40 and she wanted me back.. Did not take her lol Had someone else. Since than I have not spoken to my ex in over a year.

Anyway. Met this girl last summer through my boys girlfriend. Turns out she use to be a lesbian but has dated guys before.

She was 24 at the time now 25. Wanted to have more sex than anything I ever knew or saw. Didn't really enjoy sex because I became numb from so much. lol.

We have been together for a year. Now she is going to Medical school in the Bahammas because her grades sucked sh*t and couldnt get in an American School. So she wants to become a Neuro Surgeon.

I find out a month before she leaves that her ex girlfriend got accepted into the same school!?! I mean out of all the red flags. Then I find out my girl is on celexa because she was to damn manic and the past and needed to stay level.

She is a spoiled girl by her mom and step dad. Mom got divorced twice because she cheated on dad and step dad. But that doesnt stop all her parents from giving her what she wants.

A little about me now. I work for a pretty well known fashion designer here in NYC. I go to fashion shows, meet hot girls, even had the top super model offer to take me out to lunch.(pretty good ego boast for someone who was just getting divorced)

I know a little about game, I was AFC for awhile with my wife. Became alpha because I just didnt care and was focused so much on landing this job with the fashion people.

I am in a dilema again because I let myself go back in a LDR. Alot of similiar things between her and my ex wife but my ex wife never looked at me so much and so hard the way this girl looks at me.

I never stressed my girlfriend esp given her background and my background. But now she is in the Bahammas.(well now in Florida because of the hurricane)

She left last month and we have had 4 skype chats and are both guilty of cancelling on others.

She told me today she gets drunk every night in her room with her nieghbors who are also students that get to have their own apartments in a complex.

I mean she wont text me sometimes because she fell asleep or texts me real late at 4am. Parties with this ex pat Americans who live on the Island while all her peers are studying.

So she tells me today she gets drunk because she misses me and that she thought a LDR would be easy. She even freakin tells me she loves me for the first time a day before she leaves.(she said it first)

I was sort of looking forward to her leaving again but when she said love I got all messed up!

Now she is b*tchin to me because she says she feels survivors guilt about coming back to the USA while all of her little school island suffers in wait for this hurricane.

She has only been there a month and seems to be falling apart. I mean I am too and I want to get some advice from you guys. I know these are so many red flags and a year ago I would not have stood for it. Broke up w girls because they didnt stop Sh(9t testing me.

I notice that our roles are reversing where I am becoming the needy one and I don't like this feeling.

With NYC fashion week literally around the corner I need to focus.

Any advice on calming the thoughts in my head?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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The_411

Master Don Juan
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There is no such thing as a long distrance relationship. It's a romantic fallacy that has no hope of success. Yes, I know there are people who have ahd a long distance relationship and been successful blah blah blah jsut like there are affair partners who get married and next cheat. These are extreme statisitical outliers which means you'd have a better chance to be attacked by a bear or struck by lightning.

you saw the red flags already and more were revealed like she's drinking every night with guys.

She sounds terribly unhealthy. Move on to save yourself the heartache.
 

sadonomspa

Don Juan
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Yea.. Well I know she goes out with mostly girls but still who the hell knows if shes lying. Besides the fact she has more guy friends than girls.

I come to find out a friend of hers whos band we went to go see use to be her ex boyfriend in High School...

Shoot. You guys are making me remember stuff now more vividly.

So what now? Go to the fashion show and hook some? :)
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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scrouds

Master Don Juan
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You never mentioned you're a hooker. Yeah go to the fashion show and hook a little, go make me some cash.
 

sadonomspa

Don Juan
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Sheeetttt.. Usually on the weekends but if this falls on a Thursday I am screwed
 
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