Awkward Feeling

[lostdude]

How should I get over the awkward feeling thing?

I liked a girl from high school for almost 2 years ( and I still like her). She is a really good friend of mine when we both were in high school. Over the summer after we both graduated, I finally told her that I liked her. She totally got freaked out and she feels awkward everytime she speaks with me or when we get together. She told me about the awkward feeling over the winter break ( We both are freshmen in college). Since then both of us got really busy with the college work and we never got enough time to speak; meanwhile, the awkward feeling has reached to the utmost and even I started feeling awkward( I didn't feel that before). She'll be back during the summer. I guess we both will have time to spend with each other. Honestly, I really want HER to LIKE ME back. Cuz, according to me, I rate her around 9 on a 1-10 scale. I have tried all sorts of stuff (including trying to get over her/oneitis) but it kind of didnt work, especially because of the awkward feeling and she is really gorgeous. I really want to get that awkward feeling thing away from us and I want her to like me back. I kind of need tips because I feel this is a unique situation because it involves her uncomfortable feeling around me. I don't really seem to have any major issues with confidence or "I am not fun to be with" stuff. Cuz, she herself told me that my disposition is pleasant and my sense of humor is amazing.
Thank you guys.


Note: I have been following this website for about 6 months and it kinda paid off. And I have also gone through DJ bible and searched the discussion forums for awkward feelings. But the results weren't satisfactory.

 

[diablo]

The problem as I see it is you are in her "friend zone". Once you're there, it's almost impossible to get out of - by you telling her that you have feelings for her, you've put her on the spot... what was once a care-free friend relationship has now taken on more ominous (for her) overtones.


Here are some of the better links I found by searching "friend zone":

http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=43174&highlight=friend+zone
http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=46124&highlight=friend+zone

 

[Knicknack]

NEVER TELL A WOMAN HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT HER EARLY ON!!!

I personally wouldn't start talking about my feelings with a woman until I have dated her 4 months or more.

The problem with this chick you are CHASING is the fact that you have invested so much thought into her while she has thought about everything EXCEPT you. If you want to avoid these "awkward" feelings and situations in the future, you need to create a SEXUAL ATTRACTION from the very beginning of the relationship. This chick may have VERY VERY early on seen you as someone she would like to get romantic with, but you killed all of those feelings when you became her FRIEND.

I hate to use the word "impossible," but trying to change a girl who sees you as a friend into a lover is probably the closest thing to IMPOSSIBLE as there is. Please take my advice and chalk this up as a learning experience. The only way she will ever feel emotional ATTRACTION for you is if you begin to date other girls and make sure she knows about it. Furthermore, you should treat her like your bratty little sister and be totally C+F with her at ALL FUTURE ENCOUNTERS WITH HER. Enough with the WUSSY feelings and stuff. At 6 months on this site you should know that acting like a MAN and not a WUSS is the way to present yourself as ATTRACTIVE to women. I don't mean in a physical way either.

Good luck and keep learning.

 

[Dirtheart]

my disposition is pleasant and my sense of humor is amazing.

Make sure you are not being perceived as a clown or jester. I generally use dry humour that allows me to keep a certain coolness and appear witty at the same time. But when I'm trying to impress a girl I find myself making the mistake of doing what I think she'd find funny, putting too much expression into it and sometimes sacrificing my composure and respect to make her laugh. Doing anything for her approval is not good!

You don't want to be seen as the guy she can "have a laugh" with because that's what friends are. Aim to be witty rather than funny.

 

[Jimbo2k]

Heres how to possibly get her back:

Be friendly to her, but act uninterested. At the same time, flirt with other girls and get a life other than her. Be the life of the party, get other girls attention, and her interest level in you may very well skyrocket.

 

[Ebach]

When she smiles, note the dirt on her teeth. Note the booger in her nose. Note all the oily **** she puts to keep her face "gorgeous." Note all the details that disgust you. She's a 5 now. The secret to brain manipulation by imagination. That should be fine for a while until you find out what you want and know how to get it. Until then, keep playing the games you play. It's fun, I promise!

 

[darkofthematinee]

she's awkward around you cos you want something from her that she's not prepared to give you BUT she doesn't wanna hurt your feelings by totally kicking you out of her life.

From here there's the hard way and the easy way!

Hard way (and trust me, this is experience talking) - you can try to be "just friends" while making no secret about your feelings for her. She can't handle this - and the most you can ever expect from this route is a couple of SYMPATHY dates - if this happens - you can be sure you know how she sees you... someone below her - roughly on a level with an ant - who she (the goddess) mustn't tread on - or she'll break him forever.

Easy way (and its easy relatively speaking, but still fairly hard) - you make it clear to her that you're not interested in her. Even if you wake yourself up in the middle of the night screaming her name (wuss!) You have to make sure she doesn't know it. Once you've done that, you need to start getting over her yourself - do whatever you gotta do, see her less, (don't make a point of it, unless you really need to subtlety is usually better) spend time with your mates and date other attractive girls.

Every day you'll spend less time thinking of her, and the feelings will cool down.

Basically man, until you don't care romantically about this girl - you don't stand half a chance. And when you don't care - you'll probably think twice about wanting to be with her...

Just wanna echo what was said before too - if you straight up tell a girl "how you feel" about them out of the blue - that takes away half the thrill of the chase. Her half. Thats never a smart move.

Good luck.

 

[Ebach]

You can't be friends with her unless that's what you're after. Otherwise, you'll think about her all the time and she'll mess with your thoughts. I suggest you stay away from her for a while and get busy with other girls, hobbies whatever and actually get your confidence high. Next time you see her you'll be like she's just another girl and you won't care. If she asks what's up, just explain to her that you don't see yourself as friends with her.

 

[lostdude]

Thanks for all the advices guys!

But the problem here seems to be like this. She brought in a mediator in between us when this incident happened (It seems that I was the first person to like her). And the mediator happens to be my best friend and her best friend too. I have told this to him, the in between person, he doesnt listen and she doesnt listen. And above all this it is getting really uncomfortable and irritating too. And because of her cowardly attitude, I started hating and scorning at her and the mediator. And with that feeling of hate I also have feeling of sympathy cuz I like her. It just seems like a big unresolvable mess. Like I said, this seems to be like a very unique situation. That is why, I kind of need tips.
Thanks again.