Attention whoring on social media a red flag?

[sangheilios]

We've all seen it, the girl who posts tons of pictures on her instagram in skimpy little gym outfits, shots of her cleavage, etc. I've long been of the opinion that for a normal woman to do stuff like this is a red flag. In my opinion, I feel that she is clearly trying to get attention and validation, whether or not this is out of insecurity or narcissism I'm not sure.

However, the main issue with this is that such behavior on social media is totally the norm today and it's almost hard to say whether or not this could still be considered a red flag. I'm not even old but behavior that would have been deemed unacceptable or embarrassing just a bit over a decade ago is now completely normal.

What is your take on this?

 

[wifehunter]

We've all seen it, the girl who posts tons of pictures on her instagram in skimpy little gym outfits, shots of her cleavage, etc. I've long been of the opinion that for a normal woman to do stuff like this is a red flag. In my opinion, I feel that she is clearly trying to get attention and validation, whether or not this is out of insecurity or narcissism I'm not sure.

However, the main issue with this is that such behavior on social media is totally the norm today and it's almost hard to say whether or not this could still be considered a red flag. I'm not even old but behavior that would have been deemed unacceptable or embarrassing just a bit over a decade ago is now completely normal.

What is your take on this?

Good chicks are rare. Plenty of garbage out there.

 

[Skyline]

It's a red flag.

There's a reason why most females enjoy the beach or the pool. It's not actually swimming. It's so they can wear a bikini and show off their body.

Their behavior hasn't changed it's just society made it more accepting.

A female that exploits this is one that you should avoid.

 

[sangheilios]

It's a red flag.

There's a reason why most females enjoy the beach or the pool. It's not actually swimming. It's so they can wear a bikini and show off their body.

Their behavior hasn't changed it's just society made it more accepting.

A female that exploits this is one that you should avoid.

Going to the beach to show off could almost be comparable to girls who go out to bars and clubs all done up in their sluttiest of outfits and makeup purely for attention. I've seen women who were married out for a night with their friends dressed up like this.

However, that isn't necessarily something that they are doing on a regular basis but the point is that such behavior, both in the real world and on social media, seems to be very common and normal for them.

 

[sangheilios]

It's a red flag.

Probably the best girl I've been with does it and she does confide in me, it's a legitimate character flaw and red flag. She is loyal but the need for the attention is there. That doesn't mean it disqualifies her but it's a problem.

Do you feel it's insecurity or just a narcissistic type personality who always need the spotlight on her, granted there is a bit of overlap with both of these though. I kind of feel like this type of behavior is a bit more normal and acceptable for teenage girls but once you start getting into your 20s a lot of this behavior should be far less out there.

 

[sangheilios]

Good chicks are rare. Plenty of garbage out there.

Oh, I agree lol. I do know that there are good women out there that don't feel the need to behave in such a manner but it seems to be a rarity.

 

[sangheilios]

It's both. She tries really hard to keep it under wraps. Narcissism is almost a synonym for insecurity, look at the male NPDs on sosuave.

Having narcissistic tendencies does not necessarily mean you have NPD, but yeah I get what you are saying.

 

[Spaz]

Oh, I agree lol. I do know that there are good women out there that don't feel the need to behave in such a manner but it seems to be a rarity.

It is a rarity if ur social circle is primarily engrossed in using social media.

Enlarge ur social circle to be inclusive of other women.

 

[wifehunter]

Now you have to ask yourself this question:

Does she look like a slut?

Some dead give aways:

1. tatoos
2. body modifications aka excessive piercings and other strange sh1t.
3. tight pants or yoga pants
4. lots of skin showing or clothing that focuses on her body.
5. caked on makeup

Did I miss anything?

 

[Spaz]

Now you have to ask yourself this question:

Does she look like a slut?

Some dead give aways:

1. tatoos
2. body modifications aka excessive piercings and other strange sh1t.
3. tight pants or yoga pants
4. lots of skin showing or clothing that focuses on her body.
5. caked on makeup

Did I miss anything?

Actually depends on what you want from a woman.

If it's just to have some fun then everything is good.

If a man is looking to wife up, then point 1 and 2 is a dead give away, while the rest is subject on the location or purpose of being so.

 

[sangheilios]

It is a rarity if ur social circle is primarily engrossed in using social media.

Enlarge ur social circle to be inclusive of other women.

I'm 28, pretty much every female remotely my age range in regards to dating is going to use social media and most likely grew up through high school using it.

 

[Spaz]

I'm 28, pretty much every female remotely my age range in regards to dating is going to use social media and most likely grew up through high school using it.

Everyone has social media but not everyone is posting themselves in skimpy clothing nor do everyone has tattoos.

I'm in my 40's and date women younger then u r.

Actually I'm invited out for dates more then I invite women out.

 

[sangheilios]

Now you have to ask yourself this question:

Does she look like a slut?

Some dead give aways:

1. tatoos
2. body modifications aka excessive piercings and other strange sh1t.
3. tight pants or yoga pants
4. lots of skin showing or clothing that focuses on her body.
5. caked on makeup

Did I miss anything?

No, you are pretty spot on with all that lol. I avoid women with tattoos, odd piercings and unnatural hair colors (blue, pink, etc.) for obvious reasons, as should most men. Clothing can be a tough one because a lot of women dress kind of slutty now a days without actually being sluts, same for makeup. That's why I mentioned on my original post that I'm not sure if social media attention whoring can truly be seen as a red flag when this type of behavior is not only common but the norm, though the degree of which seems to vary.

 

[Doctor Europeo]

Yes. Red flag AF

 

[Ranger]

It stirs competition in them. A few girls do it and gets a lot of attention but isn’t shamed (socially rejected)
The other women see it and feel that it it’s an advantage in competition so they make the jump.

Competition can be fierce.

 

[wifehunter]

Clothing can be a tough one because a lot of women dress kind of slutty now a days without actually being sluts, same for makeup.

A old friend's wife had a funny saying for that:

"Dress like a goule, and goules will try to get into your pants."

 

[Mazer]

Yes, good for banging only, no feels

 

[Chi Town]

Good for banging, bring em on

 

[devilkingx2]

We've all seen it, the girl who posts tons of pictures on her instagram in skimpy little gym outfits, shots of her cleavage, etc. I've long been of the opinion that for a normal woman to do stuff like this is a red flag. In my opinion, I feel that she is clearly trying to get attention and validation, whether or not this is out of insecurity or narcissism I'm not sure.

However, the main issue with this is that such behavior on social media is totally the norm today and it's almost hard to say whether or not this could still be considered a red flag. I'm not even old but behavior that would have been deemed unacceptable or embarrassing just a bit over a decade ago is now completely normal.

What is your take on this?

Depends on if the skimpiness is excessive.

Some men are prudes who want their girl to wear sweatpants to the beach in the summer, but some women are slvts that would go outside in lingerie and a trenchcoat during the winter.

Also depends on if the posting itself is excessive or not.

There's a difference between daily selfies where she pulls down her pants to show off her ass and thong in a mcdonalds bathroom while at work, versus posting in a bikini at a beach trip. Or wearing short shorts during a heat wave.

In the end I think some guys need to get with the times, it's not 1942 anymore, your woman being sexual and sexy is a good thing unless your crippling insecurity is a bigger deal than having an attractive girl you can have fun with on your arm, etc.

As long as she isn't allowing or inviting other men to get some while you two are committed, and she dresses sexy for your benefit rather than primarily for others

Also most of the women I know who wouldn't wear something sexy have crippling insecurity. It's not that they're super good girls or anything, they're basket cases when it comes to their body and appearance.

Ironically a lot of women who self righteously take pride in """not being that kind of girl""" are just virtue signaling (whether it comes to dressing slvtty, having sex early or easy, etc.)

example: girl 1 I knew would always call girl 2 a slvt looking for attention behind her back because girl 2 was obsessed with crop tops and wore them even in the winter. in the end girl 1 ended up cheating on her boyfriend and girl 2 was 100% loyal. Funny how that works out huh?

 

[devilkingx2]

More stuff

The valedictorian at my high school posts the sexiest pictures out of 99% of the girls I know. I've seen her entirely in various sets of underwear in various locations and skirts so short a breeze would flash you (which she implies that she wore outside by calling it todays outfit). She's currently going to a college on a full scholarship to an engineering major, rather prudish about sex, etc.

For contrast a girl I dated was a complete slvt by most metrics (half a dozen guys by 18, lots of crazy stories about them, etc.) And yet when I wanted her to dress sexier and show off her body more she basically refused because "she's not just some hoe" or some dumb sh!t like that.

(Then she gets drunk and "accidentally falls into a guys lap" or "accidentally ended up in bed with a guy but I got out immediately i swear" or "accidentally got a hickey from a guy at a party")