"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Asking for a chick's number

TubularBells28

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Hello all, this is my first post here, so a little bit of background.

I am an 18 year old College freshman at a major University in Nevada. I am a psychology and english major, and while I haven't had much luck with the ladies in HS I am hoping that things will be better here.

Anyway, I have two more classes left for the day and am wondering this; what is the best way to ask a girl for her number. I did ask a chick for her number after English in this context, "I got to go, but why don't you giive me your number so we can talk later." She replied with saying, "I don't give my number out to anyone. Did I do anything wrong with my approach?

I have no problem talking and chatting with girls, and hell I am not afraid of even cold approaches. What I do have trouble with is asking for a chick's number. I don't want to sound too agressive in making it awkward and I sure as hell do not was to be a p ussy and give her my number telling her to call me back. Please give me some advice.

Well, off to class.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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DrMetallica

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You seem sorta cool, we should hang out sometime. What's your number?
 

Bible_Belt

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I don't give my number out to anyone.

It's a test. Acceptable replies include (and other people will add their own):

until now
and then you met me
It'll be ok. Just write it down

After you reply, look into her eyes, give her a sly smile, and wait for her response. The seconds will seem like hours, but make her answer you. If you piss her off, she was probably an uptight b!tch who would have been a waste of time anyway.
 

Smooth Player 056

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Originally posted by Bible_Belt
I don't give my number out to anyone.

It's a test. Acceptable replies include (and other people will add their own):

until now
and then you met me
It'll be ok. Just write it down

After you reply, look into her eyes, give her a sly smile, and wait for her response. The seconds will seem like hours, but make her answer you. If you piss her off, she was probably an uptight b!tch who would have been a waste of time anyway.
Money!
 

TubularBells28

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Meh, I got burned by the second girl I asked. I got this really wierd, bug eyes look whilst normally she has narrow eyes.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Arioch

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Did I do anything wrong with my approach?
I don't know, what was it like? Supply some more context. What sort of conversations are you having with these women? Phone numbers mean next to nothing to most of them, so you might be asking way too soon. I love a good conversation, so I've never tried to see the minimum amount of time it takes to get a number from a girl. I imagine (at least for me) it is around one minute of exceptional conversation, or two minutes of average conversation.

Some advice: There is no substitute for a phone number. Screennames, e-mail addresses, and friending on the Facebook are not acceptable.

If you're having a good conversations but still aren't getting results, don't ask--demand: "Give me your number [make up a reason if you want here]." Some girls are too shy to respond to a mere request (are you talking to other freshmen or experienced college women?), and others just have to be ordered around.

--
Arioch: Tall. Long. Great.
 

TubularBells28

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Sophomores, both of em.

I have a little fear of being demanding, I don't want them to think of me as a jerk. They are after all nice people.
 

B-Lemond

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This one is from SmoothPlayer056:

Just ask for her number so in case that you miss class and/or you forgot the homework you have someone to call and won't fall behind.
 

TubularBells28

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^^actually, I did that with the second one.

She said she is dumb when it comes to hw though :confused:
 

animal crackers

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Standard animal crackers # close:


"Give me your number"

Then just SHUT UP NO MATTER WHAT SHE SAYS.

Actually...I've only been refused once, she said bf...


Now as far as meeting up...thats another game. #'s aren't shlt. I suggest gaming girls you meet in class MUCH MORE and then just suggesting a meet when they seem attracted/comfortable with you.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Arioch

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Originally posted by TubularBells28
I have a little fear of being demanding, I don't want them to think of me as a jerk. They are after all nice people.
Then your problem is you are afraid of being a jerk. You are a Nice Guy. Well, get over it, I was a Nice Guy too (I still lean quite a bit to the nice part of the Nice-Jerk continuum), and it will get you nothing except pain. Being nice is good, but being assertive of yourself and getting what you want is more important. I'm not asking you to lie, or manipulate. Just be assertive.

Second, so long as you don't bark your demand like a drill sargeant, no one will even notice. Just put it in the flow of the conversation: "Blah blah blah, you seem to have some interesting ideas, give me your number so I can talk to you more about them later." That wasn't the best example, but something like that.

Third, how big is this school? Big enough to care what a couple of girls too stupid to see how cool you are think about you?

If you really can't do it, try a hybrid: "Why don't you give me your number?" It's still a question, but the way it is phrased it indicates you want an explanation. Of course, you've gotten those already, so how about, "When can I call you?" which indicates you expect to have their number already, or the mildly demanding, "You should give me your number."

Disclaimer: I really don't know exactly which ones of these I've used. I've never had much--no, any--trouble with this to give it this much thought.
 

TubularBells28

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Yeah, I also said, "Why don't you give me your number?"

And my university? 29000 students.
 

Arioch

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Originally posted by animal crackers
Now as far as meeting up...thats another game. #'s aren't shlt. I suggest gaming girls you meet in class MUCH MORE and then just suggesting a meet when they seem attracted/comfortable with you.
Watch out, if you don't have their number they will feel absolutely zero accountability if they decide to stand you up.
 

Arioch

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Originally posted by TubularBells28
And my university? 29000 students.
You still haven't detailed your approaches much.

At 29,000 students, just forget about what anyone thinks about you, especially if you're a freshman. They won't remember you, they won't care, they'll be gone before you are.

And try it out on some other freshmen right now. They're much easier because they are all trying to meet everyone they can, and also the upperclassmen will be less interested simply because you are a freshmen. Going out with a freshmen when you're not one can feel like babysitting.
 

TubularBells28

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^^I'll detail my approaches and bump the thread tomorrow, I got a lot of hw to do.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

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