"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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"Ask me anything you want" / "tell me a secret"

pvf94

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When a girl you just recently started to hang with says such things to you via online messaging and in person....are they trying to get you to get dirty or what?


note I havent kissed her or anything like that, we have just recently been introduced to each other and she bugs me to hangout everyday for the past 3 days lol.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Stéphane

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1st of all online messaging is lame.
2nd of all I would probably say something like but that would take all the mystery out of it. with a sexy voice tone.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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I wouldn't play this game online, no benefit to you what so ever. In person a safe bet is to answer "You first" in order to find out what type of information they want to get out of you.
 

pvf94

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
I wouldn't play this game online, no benefit to you what so ever. In person a safe bet is to answer "You first" in order to find out what type of information they want to get out of you.
Exactly, that's why I avoid it online. It's like she wants ME to set the tone of the conversation because she won't "go first". Should I quit playing it safe? And next time this happens....which it will...got an example of how I could start it off? I see this as a pretty good opportunity to set a mood and get her hot and bothered :]
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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pvf94 said:
Exactly, that's why I avoid it online. It's like she wants ME to set the tone of the conversation because she won't "go first". Should I quit playing it safe? And next time this happens....which it will...got an example of how I could start it off? I see this as a pretty good opportunity to set a mood and get her hot and bothered :]
Think of it such like a game of "truth or dare." First, which would be more fun, playing it online or together? Second, if you start off you have 50/50 chance of saying something completely fvcked up and the odds are against you because she already has the tone in mind, she brought it up didn't she? Let her go first, it'll at least define the starting point; you can always escalate from there.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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pvf94

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Think of it such like a game of "truth or dare." First, which would be more fun, playing it online or together? Second, if you start off you have 50/50 chance of saying something completely fvcked up and the odds are against you because she already has the tone in mind, she brought it up didn't she? Let her go first, it'll at least define the starting point; you can always escalate from there.
Sound's pretty solid, ill toss an update out whenever it happens again. She's clearly comfortable with being close to and touching me and so on....I don't think I can mess up to bad considering her Interest level is apparently high....I say this because of the way she looks at me, talks, and generally wants to spend time with me.

not to mention she's sorta touchy feely, yesterday we were in her computer room and the dog wanted by me but couldnt because my legs where blocking it from passing, and the girl started like patting/lightly slapping on my inner thighs saying "cmon" ah well theres plenty of stuff like that to mention...I gotta make a move.


:crazy:
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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pvf94 said:
....I say this because of the way she looks at me, talks, and generally wants to spend time with me. ..not to mention she's sorta touchy feely, ..
Dude, if that's the case with her you should only you IM to say one of two things:
  1. Come on over.
  2. I'm on my way.
:up:
 

pvf94

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Dude, if that's the case with her you should only you IM to say one of two things:
  1. Come on over.
  2. I'm on my way.
:up:

On the flip side that's sorta how she is with me haha, uses it to just say can you come over.


Oh, like I said about her touching my inner leg / stomach it's pretty much a set deal that I can do that to her now that she has done it to me right? More or less letting her up the ante....it's passive but I don't know her too well and I don't wanna scare her off.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Get to know her better so that you won't need to be in the passive role and continue to let her dictate the climate of the situation. One way is for "you" to start playing the "tell me a secret" game and draw some interesting things out of her. :up:
 

pvf94

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Get to know her better so that you won't need to be in the passive role and continue to let her dictate the climate of the situation. One way is for "you" to start playing the "tell me a secret" game and draw some interesting things out of her. :up:
good call, haha if she did it why can't I sort of thing.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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DoctorLW

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Actually, playing this game online is the SAFEST way to go about it. Anyone saying otherwise is foolish. This is a game that can go VERY badly if you tell her the wrong thing. Hence, having to TYPE out an answer and READ it yourself before you send it is the best way to ensure you don't say something stupid.

Writing things out allows you the best opportunity to convey your thoughts as accurately and as safely as possible. Also a phone conversation that takes 5 minutes lasts for 30 minutes online. It's a great medium, I'm surprised people are still so against it.
 

frisco

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Turn it on her ass and say somthing risky. IE wo wo wo i dont think we know eachother enough...yet to start telling secrets. If you dont know what to say dont jump through her loop bro
 

pvf94

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alrighty look's like I get to try the advice out tomm =P she wants to hang.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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pvf94 said:
good call, haha if she did it why can't I sort of thing.
I've always said that women don't have to be the only ones that have fun playing the game. Fair is fair, right? ;)
 

pvf94

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
I've always said that women don't have to be the only ones that have fun playing the game. Fair is fair, right? ;)
Too bad our fair is different than their fair.

haha, either way...I'll just bust it out on her if anything. "tell me a secret/ask me anything" If she does the old switcharoo on me then I get to set the tone, if she gets weirded out oh well her loss haha...though she is fine with sexual innuendo online, haven't used it in person really....I'll have to break that barrier.
 
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