MatureDJ
Master Don Juan
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
article: Why American men are getting less marriageable
- Thread starter MatureDJ
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
zekko
Master Don Juan
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It says traditional gender roles are to blame (partly). Pfft. It's more like the lack of traditional gender roles is to blame.
It does have a point though, when it points out that the US has moved to a service economy, and the majority of these jobs are traditionally female. I wrote in another thread somewhere that women's noncompetitive, nonaggressive, social, and nurturing nature make them excellent and preferred servers (in a variety of forms).
It does have a point though, when it points out that the US has moved to a service economy, and the majority of these jobs are traditionally female. I wrote in another thread somewhere that women's noncompetitive, nonaggressive, social, and nurturing nature make them excellent and preferred servers (in a variety of forms).
Who Dares Win
Master Don Juan
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I agree with you, and I would like to add that most people would like to get served from a waitress rather than a waiter generally.
Last week I went to a fastfood and found a tall strong well built guy working behind the counter, for some reason I wasnt at ease, it was just like we both knew he was out of place there.
Same thing happens when theres a fight at the club and the police station sends short fat women to check it, no matter how hard they try we subconsciously feel like they are out of place.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
zekko
Master Don Juan
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Agreed, I've even heard women say they would rather have a waitress than a waiter. It's just a more pleasant experience. And women can be less intrusive when it's called for also. Men tend to want to have some sort of commanding presence, the testosterone gets in the way.